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Home » Messageboard » The B3ta Book of Records » Message 1549823 (Thread)

[challenge entry] Ladies and Gentlemen
Roll up and see the world's worst pun*



*officially

From the The B3ta Book of Records challenge. See all 262 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! The Boy T, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:36, archived)
# ahahaha
woo
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Kitteny Berk almost certainly drunk, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:38, archived)
# woo
and erm...
groan
(There is no Mr Spoon, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:38, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! Terry Oblong There's nobody here but us chickens on, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:38, archived)
# tops
(I helped save b3ta! Sunshine Elephant, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:38, archived)
# i don't get get it
.
(baaa, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:38, archived)
# i don't believe you.
poppet.
(I helped save b3ta! pep, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:41, archived)
# poppet
huh
(baaa, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:42, archived)
# mmm
toffee poppets!
(I helped save b3ta! Heather S likes making stuff., Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:49, archived)
# i'm afraid
the raisin ones were nicer
(I helped save b3ta! Sunshine Elephant, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:50, archived)
# They were made
in a factory in Croydon which has now, alas, closed forever. Arse.

Sorry did I say that out loud?
(I helped save b3ta! The Boy T, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:53, archived)
# I am
lovink zis.
(I helped save b3ta! GR33DY, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:38, archived)
# Groooooooooooooan
Woo but still...groooooooooan....
(Icouldsleepforever, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:39, archived)
# You should win an award
most wooyay execution of an awful pun.
(I helped save b3ta! Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:39, archived)
# hee hee hee
love the intermission, very 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang'esque' of you.

w/y/badger
(I helped save b3ta! M3Essential and The Essentials. LIVE!, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:44, archived)
# i was thinking more
'holy grail'
(I helped save b3ta! smirny ~(8(|), Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:54, archived)
# That
actually caused me genuine, physical pain.
(mr chimp, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:45, archived)
# Bwhahahhaahahaha!
That's brilliant :)
(Liv, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:49, archived)
# it might be bad...
but it's also bloody good :D
(I helped save b3ta! smirny ~(8(|), Wed 9 Jul 2003, 18:53, archived)
# Surely the world's worst pun is:
A man walks into a restaurant and orders squid.

"Certainly Sir" says Gervaise the waiter. "Would you like to choose your squid from this tank?"

"I'll have that little green one with the moustache" says the customer.

"Oh no!" replies Gervaise. "He's my favourite! He's so small, cute and friendly. Surely you'd prefer one of the bigger meatier ones?"

"No," says the customer. "It's got to be that one."

So Gervaise gets the little green squid out and puts him on the chopping block, raises his knife and... the little squid looks up and smiles at him, twitching his bushy moustache into a big friendly grin.

"It's no good," says Gervaise. "I can't do it. I'll have to ask Hans who does the washing up. He's a big tough brute, he'll be able to do the evil deed."

So out comes Hans, while Gervaise disappears off in tears. Hans picks up the knife, raises it to chop the little squid's head off and ... once again the little friendly squid looks up and smiles, wiggling his little legs and twitching his little moustache.

So Hans too finds it impossible to kill him. So the moral of the story is ...



Hans that do dishes is as soft as Gervaise with mild green hairy lip squid.

Edit: Woo of course :)
(Thiefs_Pawn, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 19:13, archived)
# You
win... there is no competing with that! hehehe!
(I helped save b3ta! The Boy T, Wed 9 Jul 2003, 20:03, archived)