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# Time for some pulp.
What thrilling exploit should I send this adventurer on?

(I helped save b3ta! JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:42, archived)
# The search for
a par 38 lightbulb in local DIY stores. He has to follow the clues from store to store and is often thwarted by empty shelves with just a small label to show where these mythical beasts once dwelled.
In his adventures he has to cope with evil DIY staff and incomprehensible public announcements.
There will be a particularly gripping scene where he has to queue for 45 minutes to ask the clueless idiot at the information desk for information.


Or a quest for squirrels with tits.
(I helped save b3ta! wheelybird mreee!, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:43, archived)
# Squirrels with tits
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:43, archived)
# ^ this.
Well, actually, no.
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:45, archived)
# Why not?
(I helped save b3ta! spaceage, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:46, archived)
# I'm feeling a bit sick this morning.
/trying to get out of PE blog
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:47, archived)
# Maybe a squirrel with tits,
will do you good.
(I helped save b3ta! spaceage, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:49, archived)
# 50 laps for you Gruntfuttock!
MOVE!
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:49, archived)
# *grumbles*
alright, I'll try.

/too much Calvados last night blog
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:57, archived)
# I am drugged up to the eyeballs because of a cold
I feel floaty, hmm wait I've swapped my pain pills for my friday night pills again havent I?
/wearing neon coloured clothes and massive goggles blog
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:49, archived)
# dave!
dave....
no, he's gone....
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:50, archived)
# *helium balloons that were attached to my chair I had no idea about, pop due to loss in air pressure at the high altitude*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:54, archived)
# going up the khyber!
*sniggers*
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:43, archived)
# Bwahahaha!
I too have the sense of humour of a 6 year old :)
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:45, archived)
# he probably wants it back, you know
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:48, archived)
# He didn't mention it
when I fed him his weekly bucket of slops in my basement
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:49, archived)
# to...
the newsagents to get some milk and 20 Bensons!
(I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:43, archived)
# The long bread and milk run voyage to Sainsburys
(I helped save b3ta! The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:44, archived)
# The quest to steal back the Jade monkey
from the zombie nazis
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:44, archived)
# well
I wouldn't call Jade a monkey; they might get all offended.
(haberman is singing in the changes, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 12:23, archived)
# Could you send him round the corner to the chemist's to pick me up some lemsip?
Oh, and while he's at it he could just nip into the co-op on the way back and get some of those nice coffee cupcakes.
(I helped save b3ta! tipassoi, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:45, archived)
# nad some fruit pastelles....
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:47, archived)
# He's after the treasure of King Solomon's Mines
which is being guarded by ancient robots!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:46, archived)
# Possibly in bikinis, I don't know.
there may be dinosaurs too
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:47, archived)
# Ancient robots eh?
Like wot they are in Laputa n stuff
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:47, archived)
# Or Indianna Jones and the fate or Atlantis type thing
or Laputa for that matter
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:48, archived)
# I bet you cried when they destroyed the robot on top of the castle
sniff
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:50, archived)
# He was a lovely Robod!
I visited a few Studio Gibli shops in Japan - I have 3 Laputa keyrings and a face flannel with a laputa robot on it
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:52, archived)
# Not that i'm jealous or anything, but
YOU LUCKY BARSTEWARD!!!

*books ticket to Japan*
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:54, archived)
# Here's one
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:58, archived)
# I love Studio Gibli films
yet to see "My neighbour Totoro" though.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 12:00, archived)
# That's very good too
Faves are Spirited Away and Laputa
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 12:03, archived)
# My all-round fave is probably Princess Mononoke
The train scene in spirited away always brings a lump to my throat.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 12:08, archived)
# Oh, I dunno,
some ludicrously impossible feat.
And that gun's only got one bullet, which he will only shoot (nemesis/former friend) with due to some mystery past.
Or something.

Or maybe he's going to Rio, baby.
(I helped save b3ta! Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:46, archived)
# /piratesofthecarribeanblog
(I helped save b3ta! Weetobix, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:47, archived)
# emptying the cat litter tray
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:48, archived)
# the horror of it all!
(I helped save b3ta! Laird Dave Draws Now charges to take off his clothes., Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:50, archived)
# find the lost city of denizens!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:48, archived)
# Birmingham?
(I helped save b3ta! wheelybird mreee!, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:49, archived)
# Pipingrad's in a better state than Birmingham.
....it only suffered a massive, nuclear-style explosion.
(I helped save b3ta! JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:50, archived)
# Eating some jammie dodgers
(Toshiro thinks Chloe is #1, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 11:58, archived)
# searching for the
sailmaker.
(haberman is singing in the changes, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 12:13, archived)
# Have him take on
THE HOOKE INSTITUTE

Dun Dun Dah
(I helped save b3ta! Cocodaye Miasere likes chips and peas, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 12:47, archived)
# Heh...
actually, they're both on the same side :)
(I helped save b3ta! JollyJack - a stench from the past, Wed 26 Sep 2007, 13:02, archived)