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# Instructional Pamphlet
(I helped save b3ta! Microwave, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:14, archived)
# oooh....
words....
(I helped save b3ta! Ratsta, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:15, archived)
# Stop using your mums lipstick!
(I helped save b3ta! Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:16, archived)
# had Jehovas Witnesses give me one of their magazines yesterday
I felt a bit cheated that it was the April 2007 edition. Where can I complain about this?
(I helped save b3ta! Elvis of Nazareth This isn't a sig, it's a fucking liberty., Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:17, archived)
# Complain through prayer
(I helped save b3ta! Microwave, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:18, archived)
# *slowly backs away*
any chance of some less satantic adventures, Mr Microwave?
(I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:17, archived)
# "no"
(I helped save b3ta! Microwave, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:18, archived)
# The number of the devil is 616
don't forget the area code tho
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:17, archived)
# also the devil is just God's most beloved angel who was kicked out of heaven for not loving Adam/man
These religious types really can't get anything straight
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:30, archived)
# I remember some teacher
telling me it was because god came back and found him sitting on his throne.
Never thought to question it before, but then I'm not that bothered as it's all just mythology to me.
(I helped save b3ta! fuscous, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:45, archived)
# but, but, but... God is everywhere!
thus he can never "leave" his throne....
:D
(I helped save b3ta! The King of Hats Cone of shame, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:54, archived)
# .
(I helped save b3ta! The Snockerty Friddle, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:20, archived)
# Now this I like.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:22, archived)
# and dont forget the jaffa cakes
(I helped save b3ta! The Snockerty Friddle, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:23, archived)
# Oh my goodness, how woo.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:26, archived)
# hahahaha!
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:23, archived)
# We were wondering if
we could talk to you about JAY-sus
(chili_kitten Cheese, peas and honey bees, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:22, archived)
# I'm scarily reminded of "Se7en"
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:23, archived)
# Satan's just as fucking shite as the rest of them.
(I helped save b3ta! drbroon abloooobloobloo, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:24, archived)
# Talking about satan..
the most memorable interview I had ever read, was with an american "rock star" who's name eludes me.. He told of an attractive female fan wanting to be 'taken' backstage..

so he did.. but when she stripped and got on all fours, she had a huge pentagram tattooed on her back. Then she asked him to "Fuck her in the arse, for Satan".

Freaked out, he thought "there is no way I am fucking you in the arse for satan"!, so he shoved a shampoo bottle up her instead.

that is all I have to say about satan.
(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:27, archived)
# Now that rings a bell.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:28, archived)
# what brand of shampoo was it?
(I helped save b3ta! Winthorpe Sim-Sala-Bim, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:29, archived)
# It was....
nah...its gone..sorry.

She was then on the bed saying "OOH SATAN" with the shampoo bottle twitching..and he just sat in the corner until she was done.
(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:35, archived)
# Probably johnson's no more tears
(I helped save b3ta! Winthorpe Sim-Sala-Bim, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:39, archived)
# There is a shampoo thats dildo shaped
but im not saying any more on this subject
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:30, archived)
# It hurts
but I'mm not saying any more on this subject.
(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:33, archived)
# I found a book on google books
called The Ultimate guide to anal sex

Im not saying any more except please dont eat the cucumber in the fridge
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:35, archived)
# Thats cool there is an Ultimate guide..
If you don't know what you're doing, its gonna be pain all round.
(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:37, archived)
# By Tristan Taormino?
Get it.

edit: that might not be the one I'm thinking of, actually.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:38, archived)
# Confirmed
Its quite fascinating but my inner voice is saying its wrong to keep reading it. But also its making me laugh. Help.

Linky poos prob NSFW www.amazon.com/gp/reader/1573440280/ref=sib_dp_pt#reader-link
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:44, archived)
# It's great
the accompanying videos are worth a look as well. Most people who can't 'do' it are generally willfully uninformed about the process, and it's a great book to start off with.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:46, archived)
# I wonder what other Ulitmate Guides are needed?
(I helped save b3ta! boff FL OZ, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:49, archived)
# The misinformation tends to stem from people just not knowing what they're doing..
Yes its gonna hurt.. IF you don't use lube, and or the guy goes at it like a porn star.

Women can have the most intense orgasms through anal sex too..
(TheRiddler Hmmmmm... I concur., Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:56, archived)
# is this meant to be disturbing/scary/offensive?
you're only going to be bothering some fundamentalists with this, and they'll probably kick your face off
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:28, archived)
# Rebellion
ure doin it wrong

www.b3ta.com/board/8816291#post8816384
(I helped save b3ta! The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Fri 10 Oct 2008, 15:31, archived)