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# You've just inspired me to write a screenplay, 'The Anti-climax'
about a gentleman going around defusing tense situations before they have a chance to develop into dramatic conflicts.
(I helped save b3ta! Chickenhawk is no longer Arkwright., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:32, archived)
# "we thought a huge asteroid was going to hit the earth, but it was just a coffee mark on the screen. No need to worry!"
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:33, archived)
# "An intern has destroyed the paperwork for our peace treaty with North Korea!"
"Nevermind, I'll have the office fax over another copy"
(I helped save b3ta! Chickenhawk is no longer Arkwright., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:36, archived)
# 2012
We thought the Earth was heating up, but Billy here -*drags in red faced Prankster* had just dropped an industrial sized heating element into the water tanks....
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:36, archived)
# "'Mother' has picked up a distress call on a nearby planet, but I can't be bothered, so we'll just forget about it and carry on home"
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:40, archived)
# "The Nazis won't find the Ark without me"
"And even if they do, they'll all die when they open it.
I'm gonna stay here and have a nice cuppa."
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:42, archived)
# Having been fired from my highly-paid job, and lost access to my materialistic lifestyle
I've had a think and decided to just try and make the best of it.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:50, archived)
# "There goes another one."
"Open fire, you gunners could do with the target practice. And it's just an escape pod, no harm done."
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:52, archived)
# "Actually - I don't really mind the English"
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:08, archived)
# "Awww, to hell with it, you can have our Freedom too..."
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:09, archived)
# MIND THE PISS.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:10, archived)
# damn it, that's twice today.... *grabs mop*
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:15, archived)
# 2001: A space Odyssy
HAL - I'm sorry Dave I can't let you do that.

BOWMAN - unplugs HAL at wall, reboots

CUT TO screen shot - "restore factory settings - Y/N"

BOWMAN - selects "Y"

Credits roll.
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:35, archived)
# arf.
Star Wars.

These are not the Droids you are looking for

Yes they are, Now out of that Speeder Grandad...
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:38, archived)
# hahahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Halibut If you think education is expensive, try crack., Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:13, archived)
# "Luke, you switched off your targeting computer. What's wrong?"
"Nothing. I'm all right... Oh wait; fucksocks, I MISSED!"
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:38, archived)
# "The Death Star plans are not in the ship's mainframe"
"Oh well, they must have deleted them. Let's go home"
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:51, archived)
# :D
I see dead people.

You're one of them, pal.
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:50, archived)
# "You know that pretty lady ... ?"
"Actually, that's a guy."
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:51, archived)
# "...actually, there's a bastard of a storm forecast. Probably best just stay in harbour for a few days and wait this one out"
(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:56, archived)
# "I really do think that coffee table expresses my personality quite well.
"Material goods are ace."
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:58, archived)
# "What's that noise coming from outside the cabin on this dark, stormy night?"
"No idea. Let's stay put and keep the door locked."
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:57, archived)
# "You know what? I'd rather not bother with a stag party if you don't mind"
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:00, archived)
# gay
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:05, archived)
# "I've had it with missing this motherfucking plane!"
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:57, archived)
# "You want the TRUTH?! Oh, OK, well, what happened was ... "
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 12:58, archived)
# "Blue pill, please"
(I helped save b3ta! Joe Scaramanga with a G-double-O-D vibration, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:01, archived)
# "Let's stay somewhere else - I don't like the look of this motel."
"OK then."
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:05, archived)
# "Sarah Connor?"
"She's at work. Here's the address."

and

"Let's not land here, they're probably all dead. Let's nuke the site from orbit."
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 8 Mar 2010, 13:09, archived)