My mate used to love Staus Quo
She followed them everywhere.

In the early days her and her friend used to try and hang out backstage, and finally the other one pulled Francis Rossi.

He took her into the back of the white transit van they had parked outside and rocked her world, while my mate had to stand outside it, smoking fags and keeping dibs.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 22:18, 1 reply)

Howard Jones Pop twat
He of "New Song" and "Glad to get to Know you Well"s dog used to shit in my front garden while he was holding its lead.I shouted "Oi" at him once.
(Crapgaz, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 22:16, Reply)

The patron of my college record label was Robert Plant.
Americans always find it fucking amazing when I say I've met him. His old guitarist for his solo tours was our lecturer, and he was always coming to our showcase evenings. I spoke to him at length about the kids we had as signings, and what we were up to and future goals and that. To be fair, everyone round here has a story about him - my ex used to go round his for Sunday lunch quite a lot too.

He is an arrogant, self-absorbed cunt and I tried my hardest to avoid talking to him at every opportunity.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 22:14, 7 replies)

Another couple
I used to work for David Dein, the ex vice chairman of Arsenal.

Also used to work for a tool hire company, and once delivered a 200 ton bottle jack to Duncan Goodhew.

Last week Boris Johnson cycled past me at Aldgate.
(username failed moderation, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 21:59, Reply)

Waiting for the guests of honor to show after a Chicago Symphony Orchestra concert in 1970,
my wife met one of my friends, who then paid his grocery tab by writing pornography. My wife, wanting to being published herself, talked shop with him in blunt language, which would be problematic if overheard.

I watched out for others getting too close, but I failed to see that Daniel Barenboim and Jacqueline DuPre had entered from a door I thought closed off and they had huge grins on their faces as they stood between my enthsuiastically smut-talking wife and friend.

"Hello, we must be going."
( tromboner cherophobia is my kind of fun, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 21:48, Reply)

Garth Brooks
I was in Garth Brook's kitchen once.
(uncle_bud is not the jelly roll king., Thu 20 Sep 2012, 21:40, Reply)

Genuine disaster
I was in a genuine disaster once. 'Twas called the Quiberon disaster. A cross channel ferry (called the Quiberon) had an engine blow up half way between Plymouth and Roscoff. If you looked really carefully you would have just been able to make me out on the front page of the local paper that day.

EDIT: Oh. And I stood behind Sally Breton from The Office and Not Going Out once at an Eddie Izzard gig in the queue for the cashpoint.
(Benjimawoo, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 21:32, Reply)

I stood next to Dr Legg from Eastenders
Well, the actor who played him.

It was at a bus stop on the Finchley Road (NW London).

We both got on the bus. I got off at Golders Green but he was still on.
(Bitter and Twisted, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 21:18, Reply)

The Who
Keith Moon pissed on my shoes at a Who gig in Buxton.
(Hoaxy The only living boy in new cross, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 21:18, 1 reply)

I shared a flat in london with an aussie mate who was working as a landscape gardener
His crew were working on Madonna's house in holland park. he never met her, but once they snuck into the house and took photos of each other posing on her bed.
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:59, Reply)

A double one really
A work colleague's dog once had a fight with Billy Bragg's dog.

And I got that in "Lames To Fame" in Viz Comic.
(rogerzilla, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:57, 1 reply)

I know someone who was a regular extra in Neighbours.
Her role was to sit in Harold's Coffee Shop, in the background silently and enthusiastically mouthing fake conversation, engaging occasionally with the main characters but never with actual words.
(augsav forgot about B3ta, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:55, 1 reply)

Spuds and Greavsie
B3TA virgin...

I once had a wee wee next to Jim Bob from Carter USM.

Once pushed one of Menswear down some stairs.

Once gave an interview to an Italian music mag pretending I was in Menswear.

But my greatest claim to fame is that Jimmy Greaves mum taught my mother in law how to make roast potatoes.
(binkydawkins, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:54, 1 reply)

My mate shagged Melinda Messenger before she was famous.
I believe it was in a nightclub car park.
( Peej, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:41, 2 replies)

Without realizing it I once served Russ Abbott half a larger
it was another member of the bar staff that told who it was after I served him, there was a bit of an atmosphere in the pub that day.
( CysticSpazzGland has just puwked on your mum, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:37, 2 replies)

One of my friends is mentioned by name in a Manic Street Preachers song...
I can't think of anything more likely to propel my band to international megastardom than that...
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:37, 2 replies)

i once saw george clooney standing just 10 foot away from me
It was in that film with jennifer lopez as I'd arrived late and had to sit in the front row. You know you should guard yourself against getting the wrong impression by the expensive gemstones that jennifer lopez possesses, as she still has deep ties to the working class community in which she was raised and this actually grants her some sort of authenticity.
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:34, Reply)

One of my mates bumped into Vinnie Jones in Leicester Square
"Alright Vinnie?" he said, nonchalantly as anything
"Who the fuck are you?" snarled Vinnie
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:32, 1 reply)

I have a few tenuous links to fame.
I went to school with the guy who owned the cat in the Coronation Street titles, and I met the cat (his father also managed Liberace at some point).
Whilst at school I gave a bloody nose to the guy who would go on to marry Kirsty Gallacher.
My brother was mates with one of the Kaiser Cheifs.
My brother's wife's sister is in a soap.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:25, Reply)

I win
I've got a football signed by Windsor Davies.
( spingers, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:22, 3 replies)

Snooker Loopy
Years ago I found myself having a meal with my parents in a well known Glasgow Indian restaurant. I was facing the kitchen entrance, every now and again faces would appear from the door staring straight at my direction, even the head waiter was staring intently. Eventually said head waiter approached and asked, "Excuse me, are you by any chance Stephen Hendry (famous Scottish snooker player)".
Laughed that off, but parents reckoned we would have got the meal for free if I'd brass-necked it!!
(cargoeng, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:19, Reply)

Britney Spears
I woke up in attention seeking Britney Spears look-a-like Lorna Bliss'(she was recently on X-Factor or something) flat in Camden. She was half naked, she got into a fight with her neighbours then kicked me out in the pissing rain, with no phone, no money and no jacket. I lived in Guildford at the time and had no idea where I was. It took me 8 hours to get home.
(kendohmassif Fritzl Burger Monkey Chode, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:16, 2 replies)

Albert Marshmallow wanked over my CV
And sold me paracetamol when I thought it was ecstasy. In spite of being totally the wrong shape and size.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:10, Reply)

Modfather
I nearly pissed on Paul Weller backstage at Guildfest.
(kendohmassif Fritzl Burger Monkey Chode, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:08, Reply)

Not 30 minutes ago
I was sitting a pub near some Emmerdale cast members.

This actually happens several times a week so is really a claim to heavy drinking on my/Emmerdale actors parts.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:04, 2 replies)

Bob Fossil
I had to carry Rich Fulcher of Mighty Boosh fame back to the Palace Hotel in Buxton from a nearby house party. He was wasted, could hardly walk, weighed a ton and the pavement was icy as fuck, I managed to get him to the hotel lobby were I left the receptionist to deal with him. He was a good laugh though. I also had a spliff with Noel Fielding earlier the same evening.
(kendohmassif Fritzl Burger Monkey Chode, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:03, Reply)

rude harrison ford
he bumped into me on the tube platform, although to be fair to him i wasn't lookng where i was going. i also didn't recognise him until a friend pointed him out. if you're reading this harry, sorry.
(bumbandido mildly flaming, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 20:03, Reply)

I've been on a popular British motoring show a number of times as an anonymous racing driver. Unfortunately I'm not allowed to make a claim to fame or now even tell you who I am... Was great fun though!
(Rumbling Bear rumbled on, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 19:53, 2 replies)

My mate shagged Justin Fashanu.
Before he was dead like.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 20 Sep 2012, 19:45, 3 replies)