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This is a question How clean is your house?

"Part of my kitchen floor are thick with dust, grease, part of a broken mug, a few mummified oven-chips, a desiccated used teabag and a couple of pieces of cutlery", says Sandettie Light Vessel Automatic. To most people, that's filth. To some of us, that's dinner. Tell us about squalid homes or obsessive cleaners.

(, Thu 25 Mar 2010, 13:00)
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There are two kinds of people in the world...
Those that wash up before they have a meal, and those who wash up after. I fall unfortunately into the former category.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 14:03, 38 replies)
And those that wash up both before, and then afterwards.

(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 14:17, closed)
What about the type that only does washing up when one runs out of spoons?
Not me of course, only added for completness.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 14:46, closed)
Technically speaking
That's a genus of its own.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 14:55, closed)
A subset maybe
not a whole new genus.

Mind you I'm sure there are some new species evolving in my sink at the moment.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 15:23, closed)
especially if like me
you have a lot of spoons. I've used a wooden spoon to make a cup of coffee with in the past.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:10, closed)
I resort to having my weetabix in a pint glass
so I don't have to run out of bowls either.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:36, closed)
I like that idea
might try it for other cereals
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 17:01, closed)
Good for cornflakes
but not for museli.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 17:25, closed)
What about the type that doesn't even do the washing up once out of clean spoons?
I refer you to this tale.
(, Tue 30 Mar 2010, 10:25, closed)
Another subset
Whenever I live communally I am clean and tidy, its just when alone I'm an utter slob.

I have used a salad serving spoon for cereals though, but that was the last straw.
(, Tue 30 Mar 2010, 12:42, closed)
there are those of us
who see how many dishes they can wash during the adverts
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 15:13, closed)
During the adverts on a non-terrestrial channel
It's possible to do the lot, including the roasting tin and the pan that the chocolate sauce was made in.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:12, closed)
very true
bbc 1 & 2 are not so good for doing the dishes
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:24, closed)
you could take the TV into the kitchen.

(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:50, closed)
it's a big TV
but it's only a small flat, so i can see the telly from the kitchen. unfortunately, the sink faces the other way :(
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:55, closed)
then you need
an arrangement of mirrors, prisms and lenses to make it easier.

Or plumb the kitchen into the living room.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 17:22, closed)
i'll have to stick to mirrors and prisms
as the council might get a bit pissy with me if i re-plumb their kitchen
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 18:04, closed)
here in Spain adverts can run from 30 seconds to up to EIGHT FUCKING MINUTES!!!

Imagine how many dishes you could clean in that time.
(, Tue 30 Mar 2010, 9:51, closed)
I always moan when people stack plates
you have to wash both sides then!
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 15:20, closed)
I have a dishwasher

(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 15:21, closed)
A smugicity 6000
with croisant dispenser I shouldn't wonder.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 15:24, closed)
Only the butler knows how to use it.

(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:24, closed)
I wish I had a butler :-(

(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:32, closed)
Look, I did volunteer, but you poo pooed the idea
Ignoring my inability to wash up by hand, do you want a fucking butler or not?
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:34, closed)
I'd have to give you an interview
you need to be the right sort.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:48, closed)
I'm clean and polite, what else is there?
I could re-wire the cottage while your walking the glens.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:53, closed)
while he's wanking the glans?
you're a sick, sick person
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:56, closed)
You git
I had to check my spellings there.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 17:23, closed)

(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 18:03, closed)
Me too...
I'm just too fucking lazy to load it...and when I do get around to loading it, the fucker sits there for days afterwards waiting to be unloaded.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:07, closed)
We got one a couple of years ago
It's a godsend because previously, pots used to pile up next to the sink, now they're hidden in the dishwasher. We also forget to unload it. I think if we washed everything I doubt we'd have the cupboard space to put it all.

Incidentally, Asda are doing box of 60 Finish tablets for £6.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:14, closed)
buy the tablets in Makro
we get several thousand for about 4p
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:32, closed)
I presume you mean 4p each
and what brand? I'm one for buying such stuff in bulk when there's an offer on.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 16:51, closed)
I was indulging in a spot of hyperbole
they are the good Finish ones. Big boxes for cheap prices. The mrs actually buys them, her office being near Makro, but they are cheap. Have to buy a fucking big box though.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 17:01, closed)
Well done robbersdog,
This is turning into /OT
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 17:25, closed)
but classier
and more erudite
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 17:51, closed)
There's butlers and everything.
(, Mon 29 Mar 2010, 18:01, closed)
That's not one of Tuco's

(, Wed 31 Mar 2010, 17:41, closed)

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