More god bothering.
I have little time or respect for these fuckers. Mainly due tho their urgent need and desire to park as close as humanely possible to 'gods house'.

Nearer to thee indeed.

This rush, panic and general excitement means that they tend to park anywhere they can. It doesn't matter that it might be

1)Inconsiderate
2)Selfish
3)Dangerous
4)Lazy
5)Annoying
6)Thoughtless

All that matters is that they don't have to walk an extra 30ft to begin their pathetic supplication.

There is LOADS of places to park, a bit further up the road, and not really that far, not far at all.

Tell you what, best park in the bus stop there, yeah...I mean, there won't be any mothers with puchchairs (or fathers), school kids or the elderly wanting to get on or off the bus now will there. So long as you are as close as you can get to the FUCKING door.

Time after time I have had to repress the urge to stop the car and systematically key every car that somehow contravenes my own 'sensible parking' law. Either that or get a loads of those hard-as-fuck-to-get-off stickers, that simply says CUNT, and stick it to their windscreen. Fuck it, even a piece of A4 with obligatory magenta cock would suffice.

So to sum up, if you go to church, actively enjoy and believe in it all, the fair do's, but you are still a stupid cunt.

if however you go to church, actively enjoy, believe in it all AND be a selfish cunt. Then let god be your judge. Failing that I will judge you when you get out by standing beside your car with a placard saying

"A Selfish CUNT parked here"



Death based religion anyway, you're welcome to it ya fucking rockets..
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 23 Feb 2009, 17:14, 10 replies)

stickers work

the israeli war machine was ground to a halt for all the 'end the occupation' stickers stuck on peoples fridges in Tipperary . . . shittin it they were...
(The Cats Twat, Mon 23 Feb 2009, 17:34, closed)

Even better was that guy in Tiananmen Square.
Held up ONE sticker- one of those cool holographic ones- and stopped a column of tanks. Single fucking handedly.

Stickers are clearly an awesome tool for peace.
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Tue 24 Feb 2009, 10:34, closed)

Yay...
....any reason to stick it to them is ok by me.
(NoveltyCondomHead Clanks Wams., Mon 23 Feb 2009, 17:42, closed)

Sidewalks are pretty rare in these parts
But I specifically moved to where I live because it has some.

So it really raises my bile when a-holes park on them. I've folded peoples mirrors back a few times to let them know it's not appreciated.

I'm going to print up some passive-aggressive magnets to stick to their doors.
(Richy_T hundreds if not thousands of dollars, Mon 23 Feb 2009, 17:49, closed)

I fucking HATE people parking in busstops
or on the pavements/corners/doubleyellows/in my arsing parking space with flat number painted on it. To be honest I'm not a massive fan of cars. Are some people unaware that they're in fucking great machines when they try to take you on whilst crossing the road (not that you can see because some other cunt in a van has parked on a corner. Don't know about stickers but I do a lot of wing mirror bashing. (wheelie-bins being left on the pavement pisses me off to, so sometimes there's the glory of bin kicking into some cunts bmw.) I've also been known to walk over cars, but only in extreme repeat offender cases.
(popiellajones, Mon 23 Feb 2009, 22:25, closed)

I have a metal lanyard on my bag.
If a car is parked by a selfish cunt on the pavement, and I have to force myself past it, the entire length of the car often gets accidentally scratched along its whole length.
( sm.pl.crt.rs I don't fucking know, do I?, Mon 23 Feb 2009, 23:15, closed)

I have a bunch of keys...
When I used a pushchair for the Sparklets, I used to hold the keys in my hand... wooops. Oh deary me..

Serves the bastards right!
(Beer Elf Thought this was like a campfire, anyhow, on, Tue 24 Feb 2009, 11:22, closed)

.
How's about all the pillocks who insist on parking as close as possible to the entrance to the gym? Somewhat contradictory methinks.
(beer, Tue 24 Feb 2009, 15:15, closed)

I recommend
1) smash car window
2) Release handbrake
3) Roll vehicle into the centre of the road
4) Reapply handbrake
5) Retire to safe distance
6) Await carnage, with a pack of sandwiches and carton of Um Bongo.
(magic the cat will someone please think of the kittens, Tue 24 Feb 2009, 19:34, closed)

There's a church near me where this happens
So, every so often the neighbours complain because church visitors park across their driveways, or in their driveways (WTF?).

During the mass, the priest will tell the parishioners that the neighbours are complaining, with the tone that they (the neighbours) are all going to hell anyway so don't take it too seriously. If the neighbours were good christians, then they wouldn't mind the inconvenience.
( Sextant goes to him is emotionally erect, on this day, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 8:30, closed)