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This is a question Lurid Work Stories

"I know a railwayman of 40-odd years' service," says Juan Quar, "and he tells me a new gruesome yarn each time we meet. Last week's was of checking the time on the wristwatch of a severed arm he'd just collected after a track fatality."

Tell us the horrible stories you tease the new hires with, or that you've been told.
NB By definition, these are probably all made up. Roll with it

(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Thu 5 Sep 2013, 17:33)
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O_o
People so constipated they throw up shit???
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 10:48, 14 replies)
O_o
People so constipated they throw up shit???
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 10:48, closed)
Yep
I heard this from my other half when she was working in an old people's home.
(I helped save b3ta! heyrudi has just found this setting, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 10:49, closed)
It's mentioned in Jamie's School Dinners.
The horrors that Iceland can do to you.
(McChinaman banned, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 10:57, closed)
all those fish oils and debt, poor Icelandic bastards. And they nicked our fucking cod.

(I helped save b3ta! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 11:02, closed)
*slaps knee and mugs in a Dad-joke kindaway*

(McChinaman banned, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:28, closed)
That part freaked me out too.
Something else to add to my list of fears.
(I helped save b3ta! Pig Bodine., Wed 11 Sep 2013, 11:00, closed)
People so lacking in imagination, they regurgitate /qotw replies?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 11:01, closed)
Dino-SARS

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 11:01, closed)
no youn are

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 11:37, closed)
/ac

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 11:03, closed)
I'd never heard of such a thing...
I didn't know if it was a real thing, or AB thinking of something grim... either way it disturbed me
(I helped save b3ta! skullfunkerry In case of implosion do not look into implosion, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:18, closed)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fecal_vomiting#Unusual_types
(I helped save b3ta! Vambo, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:59, closed)
It happened to my old man
Hospital messed up a stomach hernia op.

Twisted his colon. He was rough for three or four days and ended up puking black vomit. Which was basically shit.

He was a few hours away from death apparently.
(Deskbound You insignificant speck of dust, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:58, closed)
Sounds shitty

(Testricals Having a dump, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 16:37, closed)

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