Haunted Halls of Residence!
Kinda story and a prank!

At uni in Leceister in the early 90's, our Halls of Residence were these 4 big victorian houses which held about 20 people each - a really cool place to live! Fairly big spooky houses and 1 room had lots of wood panelling in. 1 of lads living their was convinced one night he saw something.

He woke up cold one night, looked to the end of his bed and saw a small figure about 4ft high, dressed in a robe, hood up move past the end of his bed, pause, turn it's head towards him, turn away, then continue towards the window and vanish thru the wall. He wasn't the kind to make this shit up, had never seen anything before and was TOTALLY convinced it happened - he was screaming at the time and woke his room mate! He didn't sleep properly for the rest of the term.

Anyway, cruel twunts we were, saw this as a classic time for windups, involving, but not soley being :

1) Getting the spare key, letting ourselfs into his room at 3am, hiding in a dark corner and making 'odd' noises till he woke, blatantly shitting himself - he's just run out without checking. We did this weekly.

2) Middle of the night again, Opening his curtains, moving everything out of the way and creating a 'path' to the window, as if something unnatutal had made it during the night

3) Put my coat on a coat hanger and a bit of washing line, hood up, lean out of window ABOVE said haunted room and dangle the home-made 'ghost' at his window. People heard his high pitch shriek from 2 houses up. it was a long one 2. about a minute of screaming without a breath. impressive.

4) His room was on the ground floor, nearest the house phone. We'd ring it from a phone box, just once, then hang up. or leave it off the hook... swaying....


He believed EVERYTHING

If any of you went to Demontfort Uni pre-'96 when they sold them off, the house was called 'Town End Close', you'll know what i mean

Good Night. Sleep Tight. MMWWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA
(TheManofScience, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 12:37, Reply)

ouija
my friend and i were messing around with a ouija board in her room. it's very weird because although i don't believe for a second that a ghost is pushing it, on the other hand, i KNOW neither of us was doing it, simply because of the random stuff it was spelling - things like "emancipate, you don't need to be hung up on such a snorting chuffer" and other words that we would never use.

aaaanyway, there was a bad smell in there, and the light kept flickering, and we were getting a bit nervous as the glass was flying round the circle really hard. then it spelt out "beware! i am a de" before we started screaming and ran downstairs.

my ex was watching tv down there. he was not amused to be interrupted at first, but then he was highly amused. he spent the next 3 weeks yelling "beware! i am ade!! adrian the devil!!!" to irritate us...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 12:35, Reply)

ghost busters dont cross the streams!
Once we were going to take the dog for a walk but couldn't find the umbrella, so we went with out it, when we returned..... bom bom boooooom it was in the middle of the lounge! Why the fuck would a ghost use an umbrella?

When I was about 10 me and my friends used to go ghost hunting, my friend had a pupett crockadile on his hand... I forgett his name (the crocadile's)

Any way there was this storm drain where we thought a ghost lived. Any way this kid was quite serious about ghosts.

One day we found an old CO2 Fire exstinwishheerrr (sp?) So we ran to this kids house and told him we had seen the ghost in the old wood. So he and croc hand came with us.

When we got there, one of my mates was in an old shed with the exstinwisher (cant fucking spell!) We told the kid the ghost was inside, just as he built up enough bottle to open the shed door, my mate let go with the CO2, croc hand shat his pants and ran off!

Funny as fuck!

If your bored go to your local church and ask the vicar if you can borrow some holy water. Report to me what he says.
(ruud316, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 12:28, Reply)

The Haunted Science Lab
I work as a Science teacher at a school which, despite a lot of added-on buildings, has a bit of a creepy air about it. During my first half-term, I got a new Nokia phone and decided to have the noise of a girl laughing as my prompt for when I get a text (Nokia users, it's called "Cackle" and is on all polyphonic phones if you care).

During a Year 8 class, I was helping a group of rather timid girls with their experiment when, all of a sudden, I recieved a text from a mate organising the night's drinking. Unfortunately, as it was new and hadnt worked everything out, the laugh was loud and really noticeable. One of the girls turned and said "Did someone just laugh then?". As they all agreed, I played dumb and then, being an EVIL TWAT, mentioned to them that there were rumours of a little girl ghost wandering around the school.

Little did I know that this would lead to the entire lower school believing my lab is haunted, and lead to four girls crying hysterically when we had a lightening storm during the lesson.

I MIGHT come clean when they leave in Year 11.
( Rev. A-MOL is lurking around these parts again, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 11:59, Reply)

The bumper book of ghouls, ghosts and practical jokes.
1. the rolling mirror of fate.
some of our neighbours had a teenage/early 20's son who purportedly saw dead people, we were sitting in their living room one day and from by the side of the settee where i was sitting a mirror rolled out and round in reducing arcs until it settled on the floor dead in the middle of the the room. it had been leaning against the wall at an angle so chances are even if it had rolled by itself it would have fell over as soon as it rolled out past the settee.

2. the haunted dimmer switch of doom
in our house at the same time as the mirror thing happened our dimmer switch in the living room would go from barely on (low-light) to being physically fully turned around and the light on full in a split second with myself and my mum both sitting the other side of the room and no one else in the house.

3. the phantom door handle rattler.
sitting in my bedroom one night in the house on my own watching tv i heard what sounded like one of our cats bounding up the stairs and then the door handle on the room next to mine being rattled (our cats learnt to jump up and hit the door handle when they wanted to be let in the house). i went out on the landing and all the doors were close so i checked the other bedrooms thinking a cat was locked in somewhere... nope. i head down stairs and all the doors were shut in the hall as well so the cat hadnt gone back down either. i still have no idea what made the noise.

4. the ringing phone of terror.
in the same house we had the phone disconnected for years, when we finally had a new line fitted i was in the house alone that evening and i had about 30 calls at random intervals where the phone would hang up either as i went to answer it or had just picked it up. it would only happen if i was in another room (i waited by the phone for 20 minutes and it didnt ring until i went in another room despite being minutes apart at some point) no one we knew had our number yet and even my mum didnt know it so it wasnt here calling.

5. the jumping table of beelzebub.
sitting in my nans living one one sunday evening with about 8 members of my family all watching telly when out of the corner of my eye i notice some movement at the end of the room (it was a long living/dining room) i turn my head just in time to see the heavy oak dining table drop an inch back on to the floor with a loud thud and then rocking from side to side from the impact. everyone was at least 6 feet away from the table and it was a big heavy table (seating about 6-8 people).

and the fun ones...

6. the country lane of blood.
myself and some mates were driving around bored out of our skulls so we decided to drive down some scary country lanes. we reach one and my mate dares me to get out and wait in the (pitch) dark until they reach the end of the road, turn round and come back (about 5 minutes). i agree on the proviso that i get to hang on to their shoes (so they dont leave me there). i get out of the car and as soon as they are out of sight, i put one of the shoes in the middle of the road and hide in the bushes a bit further along. when they return they slow down at the shoe and as they reach it i jump out of the bushes and shout. cue my mate executing an emergency stop and two very high pitch girl like screams coming from my two male mates. them being shaken up and me laughing my arse off for the rest of the night.

7. the tale of the escaped mental patient.
again driving in a friends car one evening we were bored and thoughts turned to scary stories. knowing my best mate is gullible and easily scared i started telling him a revised version of the axe murderer/mental patient who attacks the boyfriend of a couple after he gets out of the car to investigate a noise and the girlfriend then hears a banging on the roof and it's said murdered with her boyfriends head. well i said it happened in the woods we were in at the time, back when we were little (about 8) and it was a mental patient who escaped the local hospital. i also said it made the national papers but as it was local our parents probably didnt want us to know about it but i'd read about it anyways. my other mate picked up on the wind up and embelished/corroborated the 'facts' until my mate was 100% sure this actually happened. we later park up somewhere (gullible mate in drivers seat, me in back seat directly behind him) and while we're talking i slowly wind down the window put my arm out and bang as hard as i can on the roof above his head. cue him screaming like he was going to die and jumping so much he hit his head on the roof, it scared him so much that when it came to drop everyone off home he refused to drive the last bit of the journey alone and made my friend go with him and then paid for him to get a taxi back to his own house (about £10).
( HatBeard, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 11:54, Reply)

At 14
Me and my friend 'Guv' and a couple of others were intrigued, and decided to try and do a Ouija board.

Well, it went shit from the start. We tried to find summat to use. It ended up being the back of a monopoly board. We used his mom's brass thing type vase off the fireplace. It was in the 6weeks hols, so june sun was shining.

We just couldn't get the room dark, but we continued.

So, piss poor curtains letting light in, a shit board, shit vase, and some scruffy notes we'd scribbled out for lwtters and words.

Just as we were about to start, 'Guv' bottled it because he 'didn't want the house to be destroyed'. So, that was it. Pussy

and I've never even thought about doing another one til now.
( Mart No Fool No posts but lots of stalks recently., Fri 21 Apr 2006, 11:48, Reply)

I went into HMV and bought an album entitled "Cradle of Filth". Sort of went downhill from there.

( Laughing Boy, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 11:42, Reply)

Tarrot card crap.
Soon after starting uni, I spoke to a girl on my course, who happened to be into tarot readings and all that, after showing her the abandoned mental asylum (seriously, storthes hall student village has it all!) she offered to read my cards.

A few nights later I got a call asking me to go round so she could read my cards, I was sceptical, but decided to keep an open mind, plus, she might introduce me to some fit friends, so I was up for it.

The alarm bells should have started when I walked to the flat, waved to her, and her friend, who I'd never met, and looked like an insane Harry Potter, but as a girl, waves at me with all the enthusiasm of welcoming a long lost brother home.

So we went into the tarot reader’s room, and things started getting weird, the crazy looking girl was grinning like a spastic lobotomised cult member, and Turkish belly dancer music was playing. Then came the cards, I was asked to do a few splitting of the deck then up came my deck. I got a lot of wands, which apparently, made the suit card, the knight of wands stronger. I was told I had the knight of wands, the king of swords and a few others that didn't sounds as cool. I hoped to hear I was to be a great warrior, and to save the world from despair and evil, after all, KING OF SWORDS, the Knight of wands furthered my belief I was to fight evil, after all, it is a knight!

No, they didn’t mean anything cool, the king of swords was upside down, so it was reversed, I believe. It meant I would meet a cruel man of ill intention, but some other cards meant I would reminisce and make peace with him.

The best part was that the first thing she said was "So, I see your a family man?" my response was "Erm, no. I'm kinda glad to be away from them." the second statement, "Well, you are either home sick now, or will be soon." I didn’t want to leave at the end of term and never missed home at all. There were a few other things, but those few things stuck out as the least vague, and so far, have been totally wrong.

Tarot cards eh?

No apologies for the length, she didn’t introduce me to any girls and wasted an hour of my life.
(Mong goose, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 11:20, Reply)

I see mad people
Has anyone noticed how mad people seem to be able to tune in to spirits (or claim to)??
Our local has its resident mad person who claims to talk with the resident ghost (the landlord who hung himself, oh how typical). He says he tells him what to order and hates the new manager.
Then again, the other day he told me I was "Peter Pan's Slut" so maybe I shouldn't listen to him.
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 10:57, Reply)

graveyard fun...
We went on a school trip to the local churches graveyard (we had fun trips) and me and a couple of mates thought it'd be funny to freak out the people who were being really superstitious (not walking over graves and stuff) by pretending to summon the dead, waving beads around and chanting and crud like that. Didn't work though (the summoning that is, the people were getting well annoyed - which was good enough for us). Then the teacher said that all the gravestones had been moved, so weren't actually at their graves - cue mass hysteria from the people afraid of walking on graves.

As for the comeuppance, well we did no work and got shouted at repeatedly for mucking about, and then again for doing no work. Eh, you can't win em all - but they wouldn't have messed if I'd raised something.
(Eldraduffin is not paranoid, they ARE all out to get him., Fri 21 Apr 2006, 10:54, Reply)

And here's the maths
Flash mind reader's secrets EXPOSED.
( calgacus Non sum qualis eram bonae sub regno Cynarae, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 10:50, Reply)

Contacting the dead?
Daphne & Celeste interview:

www.girl.com.au/d&c.htm

Q: How did you meet Celeste?
Daphne: We've known each other forever.

Q: How old were you both at the time?
Daphne: We were about eight years old.

Forever + 8 years = surely we are interviewing dead people here?

(PS: I didn't know anything about D&C until they turned up in the "heckles" qotw, since I long since left the UK. My beloved homeland appears to be self-destructing into pap. Sigh.)
(Fred Trellis I am her son. Get over it., Fri 21 Apr 2006, 10:42, Reply)

ouija board as a young teenager, at some stupid party
question: can we talk to sid vicious?

answer: NO

question: why not?

answer: BECAUSE HES DEAD
(Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 10:28, Reply)

Don't call the ghost a turd
When I was still living at home strange things used to happen - noises, smells, cold spots and a strange man who used to watch you wee.(Yvette Twatty Fielding eat your heart out). My mum used to deny the existence of the cheeky-chappy but absolutely refused to go into my bedroom alone where most of the 'activity' was.
Some friends came round one day and I was telling them the latest happenings. One of them, a previous non-believer, was seriously taking the piss. "There's no such thing and anyway, I bet whoever he is he is a right TURD". Suddenly there is an almightly BOOM from upstairs and the lights go out: I've never seen anyone run so fast with a damp patch in their kecks. Hee hee.
The best bit was as my brother, who we didn't know was in, came tumbling downstairs laughing his pants off after having pressed the circuit breaker, the naughty scamp.
Pervy ghost got his own back though - as he started to feel my nipples after that in bed :/
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 10:26, Reply)

Not really...
But I've played Dungeons and Dragons once or twice.
(Catfish Ma, why can't I draw? "Because you have fins dear", Fri 21 Apr 2006, 10:18, Reply)

God sends a sign
Years ago I worked for a particularly crap tabloid called the New Zealand Truth, kind of made the Sunday Sport look like Arts & Letters Daily. There was no bollocks it would not print, apart from one instance ... a day after a moderate earthquake struck a town in the central north island, the chief reporter recieved a phone call from a strange little man:
- About this earrrthquake in Edgecumbe, said the strange little man (imagine a Mr Bean type voice)
- Yes, said the reporter,
- welll, you know how animals are supposed to behave strangely before earrrthquakes, dogs start howling, birrrds start building nests..
- yes, yes
-well, the night before the earrrrthquake, me and my friends were at a prayer meeting, when suddenly...
-yes, yes, go on..
- a GIANT CICADA CLIMBED THROUGH THE WINDOW AND FLEW AROUND THE ROOM. AAAHH AAAAAIIEE DEAR GOD
He could have told us more but he was too distressed.
We let that story go.
(mudskipper, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 9:58, Reply)

Off Topic?
Is it me, or has this QOTW turned into a collection of ghost stories?

And no token references either!
(Catchag "You know!....For Kids!", Fri 21 Apr 2006, 8:40, Reply)

apeloverage

All of the numbers that could mathematically be the right answer have the same symbol next to it. They're all multiples of nine.
( Digeridude Lord Wellington's Beef Trapeze, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 8:06, Reply)

awnted 'ouse
My mate used to live in a house across the road from a church. The house was supposedly built on an area where a building where the monks used to live once stood or something. Many strange things happened there including his Mum being prevented from entering the kitchen by an unseen force and his sister seeing the ghosts of two little girls laughing on the landing (the laughing of the two girls was heard on many occasions). I was a bit sceptical about it all until one night I stayed at the house. In the early hours of the morning I awoken by the family dog, who was very old and died not long after, growling and barking at the closed door to dining room. The dog never barked at anything normally as she was so old and hard of hearing, but there was definately something in that back room that she didn't like very much.....needless to say I was bricking it and didnt sleep a wink for the rest of the night!
( surfpunk 's not dead, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 7:45, Reply)

why people believe in ghosts/god/magic (not coz they're stoopid)

Download this Flash animation -

www.apolitical.info/mindread/psychic.swf

it purports to be able to read your mind to see what symbol you've picked. The first time you do it you'll probably think "it's one of those things where you add 20 and divide by 2 and add the number you first thought of, and it always ends up with the same answer". But then you'll pick a different symbol and it still works - and most likely you'll come up with all kinds of explanations which are much less likely than the actual one.

Conclusion: the answer people instinctively reach for isn't always the one that makes the most sense.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 7:36, Reply)

Grandad
Oh,and also,because my Grandad died at my Nans house,I used to be scared to sleep over there. Id hide uner the covers until I fell asleep because I was scared I'd see his ghost. Never did though.
(Miharu, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 7:19, Reply)

I like being brave...
A while ago,I worked in a big posh hotel/restaurant place. The kinda place where they hold functions like weddings and school leavers balls. Id been there a few times before taking the job and its a huge,beautiful old building.

My job was basically as one of the slave team of waitresses at weddings,and one day,in the kitchen,our huge,industrial size jar of mustard ran out,so the kinda head woman (tiny,chavvy lady in her mid 40s,wearing a ton of gold) said to some chav tart i worked with "Go down to the cellar to get some mustard,wil you?" The girl was like "Oh,do I have to? Cant I take someone with me?" It was then decided I should go cos I was new and i needed to learn my way around.

On the way there,the girl explained to me,the cellar was apparently haunted and a medium had come an told them it is the ghost of a young boy from when the place was a stately home. The boys parents used to lock him in the cellar when he was bad,and somehow he had died down there.

"Cool" I thought, "I can prove how brave i am to the wussy chav!" So I looked at the dark cornery bit that was meant to be haunted,and I must admit it was damn scary. Then,as we were about to leave,we heard a small noise,like when you cough but you are trying not to. We shat ourselves and ran.
(Miharu, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 7:16, Reply)

I got an email from a stranger

which offered to increase the length of my penis.

Astonishingly, I have a very tiny penis. EXPLAIN THAT SKEPTICS.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 6:20, Reply)

VERY haunted work
I work in a wine shop and it is haunted. I'd like to say the building has a long and spooky past... but it doesn't. It was originally a drive-thru fast-food restaurant in the 1950's, and was a country/western bar after that (okay that's KINDA scary). No deaths, no horrible surgery, nothing. Anyhoo, I used to work nights, and the damnedest things would happen. All the lights in the beer cooler went out one night. Two people on shift, both of us behind the counter, no customers, all the doors locked., nothing stacked in fornt of the lightswitch. No explanation, but both switches were in the OFF position. Same thing, late at night, and all 7 cooler doors slam closed, and open to the limit of their hinges, over and over, for about 30 seconds. Countless werid smells and sightings. Often one of our staff will comment that there's a customer out front, always an older gent, and would I mind watching him while they go and stock the beer (as we do last thing every night, and it requires being off the salesfloor) No-one there once I'm out front but they'll swear up and down that there's someone there. Worst story comes from a former staffer who let themselves in one night after close for a bottle of wine, and had their wine knocked out of their hand as they were leaving. I NEVER go into that store alone after close. Creeps me right out.
(Savitar, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 5:44, Reply)

The International Hostel in Ottawa, Canada
was originally a prison, condemned in 1977 for cruelty to prisoners and reopened the following year as a hostel. It is said to be haunted by a man who was the last to be publicly hanged in Canada. Examining the evidence today says he was framed. The hostel is considered one of the most haunted places in North America.

My friend from Australia, unaware of the ghost stories, checked into that very hostel. She walked up to the third floor lounge room, and halfway between the second and third floors she felt an excruciating pain across both thighs. The pain remained for three days, until she had checked out and left the hostel.

Upon hearing this, I was amazed. I informed her that the third floor lounge room was once the prison surgery, where amputations were regularly performed without anaesthesia.
(ghettobooty, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 4:50, Reply)

My girlfriend...
When she was in early elementary school, a bunch of schoolmates egged her on to dismember a big dragonfly. She cut it into small bits, prolonging its death before the final cut.

Years later, she and her unrelated middle school friends got out a ouija board at a party. And guess who contacted her? The dragonfly. It told her it hated her and that it was waiting for her in the afterlife.
(racetraitor has an alibi for, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 3:39, Reply)

Well...
We lived in an old house (the front plate had 1901 on it, although we knew the house was built in 1907).

The house was... odd to say the least. There was something not quite right, and it showed rather well:

First, you never felt alone, even if the house was empty. It always felt like someone was in the same room as you.

Secondly, things would fall off of shelves randomly. Even things that were just put up (and properly so they wouldn't fall) would fall down a few mins later.

Thirdly, the second bedroom had someone in it, in the sense that at night, you could feel someone looking at you from the window, as if they were sitting on the inside. When I had that room, there were times where I turned away from the window, and the presense felt like it got closer to me.

Fourth, we were all away on holiday, except my dad who didn't want to come with us. Our parents room was the one at the front of the house. Directly down the hall was the bathroom, the second bedroom's door was halfway between the two. The parents had a full-length mirror set up, and it pointed down the hallway. One night my dad was in the bed, and he looked towards the mirror, only to see a woman standing in the bathroom. (We were all away on hiliday, so it wasn't us!). This freaked my dad out so much that he didn't sleep for the rest of the time we were away, to the point where he stripped all the wallpaper from the breakfast room.

The final clue that the house wasn't right came from the "incident". One night my mother and my sister and me were in the house. We were all upstairs, in our own rooms, attempting to get some sleep. There was this almighty crash, like something huge had broken downstairs. My mother and my sister assumed it was me, and I assumed it was one of them too, since neither left their room to invesitgate. In the morning over breakfast, we discussed the noise. "I thought it was you"... "No, I thought it was you..." We searched the whole house to find what had broken, and to this day we never found anything.

NeoThermic
(NeoThermic Mon 9 Apr, 22:49, Fri 13 Apr, 16:28, Wed 19 May, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 3:11, Reply)

Ah, messing with the dark side you say?
Fair bit of experience with that, although that's not relevant to the story here. I was about 13, and staying in London with my Dad. He was doing something to the bathroom which made it smell of paint stripper and oranges- getting rid of the mould or something. Anyways. He looks out of the window, and sees a huge orange light in the sky. "James!" He calls. "Come look at this UFO!". I calmly walk out, bursting his UFO bubble... "Dad, that's an airship you dosy git".
( jim_bob can herd cats., Fri 21 Apr 2006, 2:55, Reply)

Messing With The Dark Side, eh?
We put on the album and played Wizard Of Oz next to it, like it says.. un-canny.

I do recall a bunch of my loony friends telling me that they tried a Ouija board once, and ended up contacting Elvis. This wasn't as monumental as you might expect, because apparently he ended up just telling them to fuck off and leave him in peace. Fair enough.
(Poogle, Fri 21 Apr 2006, 2:53, Reply)