Changing bodies
I was just reading on another forum that different sports change our bodies (obviously), and I was wondering...

how has your body changed over the years and what's caused it?


*Awaits obvious puberty/sex gags*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 18:53, 22 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

First fact of 2009
The Pope can speak fluent Klingon.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 16:30, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Britain
It's damp and about 5C. We can't even have a proper winter.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 16:26, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Tesco Express........
Browsing the shelves of the local Tesco Express earlier....

note the following observation, Spicy Chicken Curry pot noodle = 89p, beef and tomato pot noodle = 89p and bizarrely chicken and mushroom 87p.....

can anyone shed any light? maybe there is less shit in the chicken one to kill me, i may have prolonged my life by several minutes choosing the cheaper option, then again, i may have cut it short
(Sir_Digby_Chicken_Caeser [email protected], Fri 2 Jan 2009, 16:17, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Good morning fellow QOTW'ers
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and New Year. I did. It was fucking ace.
And my new apartment is coming along nicely.
This year is gonna be a gooood year!
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 15:41, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

It's been blizzarding all day
The snow cave my landlord's kids made looks awesome enough to sleep in (if I were drunk and locked out say..) and there is fine powder snow up to my knees even in the centre of town. Awesomeness for new knee high boots I say!

AND I am going snowboarding tomorrow, broken shoulder be damned! (Likely :p) Happily I have an appointment with a physio next week :D

Just a mad post of happy. Enjoy!
(darras jeg har en grevling i hodet. Grevling, grevlang, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 15:29, 11 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Here's your chance
to decide how I get drunk tonight.

Someone gave me a bottle of Chivas Regal whiskey. I don't normally drink whiskey and I'm not a huge fan of drinking spirits neat. I don't wanna stick shitty cola in it, so...

YOU get to decide what I mix it with.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 12:00, 28 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I love you guys.
You make me whole again.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 9:10, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Good morning.
Is anyone about?


( wanderlust, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 8:04, 57 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Oh Hi.
Isn't it awfully fluffy on here? Not like that bally awful /talk. Gosh what a bunch of horrid poor people. One is to understand thet most of them heve weight issues, a bit like our cook. She is jolly tubby and deddy says she eats too much food and so he is going to reduce her wages which is fun.

We went shooting on the estate today. I didn't bag a single bird which was disappointing but then deddy bought me another horse, so I didn't mind too much. *snort*
Well I must go now as my boyfriend, who has a title *snort* is munching down on my ladyflaps as I type and one is going to give him a jolly good squirting.
Pip Pip and new yars greetings. *snort*
(******, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 19:16, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Happy New Year
to one and all
x
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 1 Jan 2009, 19:10, Reply)

What crap Christmas gifts did you get?
What I got for Christmas... Best present ever, cotton rich mens socks!!!!


(aroe_m0rre, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 17:17, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Who wants to be the first QFTL user to get themselves wound up, or over-excited as JMG is on?
No fat birds.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 1 Jan 2009, 16:29, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

oh
great
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 13:42, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Happy New Year to all!
Here's hoping 2009 is a good one!

I have recently been introduced to the work of Tim Minchin, and it's very good. What new experiences will you be having in 2009?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 13:17, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

An all time low.
Last night I was in bed and fast asleep by 10pm. This was due to a knackering day of decorating and cleaning, exacerbated by starting a bottle of wine at 5pm. Not even back to back Father Ted episodes could keep me from my bed. I was rudely awoken at midnight by bloody fireworks so I put in my ear plugs, (I have a neighbour who sings), and drifted off back to sleep.

Someone who shall remain nameless didn't even send me a HNY text. *pout*

Boys are rubbish!
( girlinthehole, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 13:13, 6 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

A cup of milk just exploded in the microwave.
Just a normal cup of full-fat milk. Exploded all over the microwave.

Google isn't being forthcoming with a reason why it would do that. This disappoints me greatly.

This post was brought to you by thesecondquietestdayoftheyearfortaxis.com
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 8:52, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

New Year
Things that are great:

New Zealand being pretty much the first ones to have the New Year

Things that are not so great:

Working at a pub for 17 hours on New Year's Eve.

Things that are great:

Starting 2009 by getting pissed on the free champagne provided by my boss, being paid by said boss, and running around serving customers whilst out of my tree (nothing to eat all day, so I was drunk fast)

Not so great:

Working at 10am this morning after 4 hours of sleep. Feeling like a pig shat on my head.

Happy New Year!
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 7:02, Reply)

HOGMANAY!
Fucking amazing! It genuinely brought tears to my eyes. The whole thing was just a magical experience. I cant think of a better way to ring in the new year.

PS. Dont clip the covers off the parking metres. The police wont like you!

Happy New Year to you all :) :)

I have champagne
(i should have joined myspace, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 2:04, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I still have 5.5 hours left of 2008....
So let me know if you stil need anything from here and I'll pick some up on my way out of the year.
And Happy New Year to the rest of you who have actually moved on*.

*Ya know, cause I'm a bit slow and still stuck in last year. Yeah, that was supposed to be a really funny joke but we all know that Merkins aren't all that witty. Though when you think about it, Workboresme will be the last of the lot to hit 2009 since she is 2 hours behind me, but she is far wittier than I. Although, now that I think of it, there are a couple more Texans on b3ta, of course they are all in the same time zone as I. And now my joke explanation has gone on long enough so I'll just end it here.....as it was a bit of a crap effort and all. Perhaps I should just take up drinking as I seem to be far funnier when I drink....at least to my mind I am.
( flirting with badgers What? It sounded good at the time., Thu 1 Jan 2009, 0:35, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Last
Or first :)
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 1 Jan 2009, 0:00, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Last fact of 2008
In her spare time, Cameron Diaz constructs life-sized Lego models of famous baseball players
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 17:46, Reply)

Bastard
couldn't find any vol au vents in the shops.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 16:46, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have a quick fashion question
for you all.

Which cufflinks should I wear this evening?

Details within...
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 16:14, 12 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Here's to 2009!
Hope you all have wonderful New Years Eve parties!
As the majority of you are sleeping off your hangovers at 8am UK time tomorrow, I'll just have started celebrating.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 16:05, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Merry Christmas, Mom.
I'll get it there as soon as I can.



EDIT: *tut*
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 31 Dec 2008, 14:28, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Happy New Year
From me and Mrs Legless.

She's on call tonight and we're seeing the New Year in together watching the fireworks before the inevitable calls for her to go back into work to patch up some fuck-wit who's just driven into a wall.

But at least we were together as the year ticked over.

It's 2009 here in Oz.

God Bless You All.


Cheers

Edit: first
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 13:13, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

The Holly And The SHIT
When they are both WANK
Of all the CUNT that are in the PISS
The BASTARD FUCK WEASLE __________________________
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 13:09, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Fact of the Day
In an average year, Aeroflot uses 92 miles of Gaffer Tape
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 12:33, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

FIVE SWOLLEN RINGS!
4 colostomy bags
3 French letters
2 testicles
and a __________ in a __________
(Jam Mincer Geordie is oiling his biceps, Wed 31 Dec 2008, 12:04, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)