i have a question
but it's too whiny for its own, so i'll chuck it in here.

i have a friend who is great fun but dreadfully high maintenance. she could take offence at the queen's speech. usually i put up with it, but last week she went too far. during a text conversation, i mentioned that a family friend had died on my mum's anniversary. she had clearly forgotten, which is fine, but then said "how did you mark the anniversary?" so i told her what i was doing on different days with different people to mark it, and her response was... "whether you meant to or not, it sounds as if you are having a go at me for forgetting." this utterly incensed me - since when was my mum dying ALL ABOUT HER?????? i was so angry that i even deleted her from facebook, shock horror. i only ever cull people from fb if i never see or speak to them and so it's a bit pointless, i've never deleted a real friend before.

now she has sent me a group email about drinks and a christmas card, so she clearly feels a bit bad, but hasn't had the guts to say anything. so should i carry on shunning her, because i am still pretty disgusted, or grow up because we're not 13 any more?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 12:56, 7 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

You know, you could actually tell her what the problem is.

( Kroney, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:00, Reply)

i did!
i sent her the harshest text i've ever sent anyone in my whole life telling her that i found her suggestion that i would use my mum just to make HER feel bad (to say nothing of the fact that i have absolutely no reason to make her feel bad, we were planning a night out ffs!) to be the most offensive thing she could have found to say. i never fall out with anyone normally, but this just wound me up beyond all belief.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:02, Reply)

And how did she reply to that particular text?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:04, Reply)

With a picture of her bumhole

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:06, Reply)

For quality control purposes
I'm going to need to see this picture.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:15, Reply)

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Has she apologised to you?
And I mean actually said sorry, rather than just inviting you to some lame drinks event.
( Kroney, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:05, Reply)

do you want to hang out with her any more?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:07, Reply)

^this
How close a friend was she?
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:11, Reply)

yeah, because this incident may have just made you come to the conclusion that you don't need them in your life anymore
don't worry about shunning them, and don't worry about being immature or something.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:12, Reply)

this i think sadly

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:17, Reply)

then don't feel guilty about it
she did something stupid, that has made you realise you don't need her around. You shouldn't need to defend or rationalise it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:21, Reply)

Fill your life with lovely low maintenance people like I do.
I can only think of one person that I've ever been friends with that was slightly problematic.
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:26, Reply)

Stop shunning her.
She just sounds a bit shit and is now at a loss as how to put right this mistake that she is probably embarrassed about.

Have you told her how angry you are/were?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:00, Reply)

see above...
it's normally impossible to upset me, but i'm a bit sensitive about my mum, esp on the anniversary!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:03, Reply)

Set her up with Bert.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:04, Reply)

Well, we do all share a proportion of our genetic makeup with bananas or something.
So I suppose technically they are related...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)

Or just tell her to 'fuck off'.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:11, Reply)

Shun her until she apologises properly
She sounds like a right cheb-end.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:05, Reply)

Stop saying Cheb!
To me, that means breast. So in essence, you're calling her friend a nipple.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:09, Reply)

I AM CALLING HER A NIPPLE
I know what I'm saying.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)

That's a rubbish insult
There are far better ones!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:11, Reply)

Fine
She sounds like a fucking horrible cuntface of the highest order.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:13, Reply)

That's better.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:15, Reply)

I'm glad you like it.
Seriously though, ditch the bitch.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)

Put her contact details on here
I'm sure one of the many perverts can set her straight.

In all reality, yes, she's a tool. But I don't think she meant to cause offence, she just sounds a bit of a retard. I've got a friend who is the same, I've just come to a point now where I'm brutally honest with her if she starts anything, maybe you could try that?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:08, Reply)

Turn up to the drinks
but throw a bucket of offal over her and storm out.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:09, Reply)

Come on, this is rswipe we're talking about
She hasn't got the guts to do something like that.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:10, Reply)

intestinalolz

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:13, Reply)

Particularly if it entrails violent confrontation.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:14, Reply)

I bet she knows a man who has.

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:14, Reply)

Something like "She's got the brains, he's got the Brawn?"

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:16, Reply)

*sings*
Let's make lots of money!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)

this is very good
even though Brawn is made from a pig's head
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:22, Reply)

I can't help feeling
everyone is making light(s) of my suggestion.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:25, Reply)

Tbh, after I said 'guts', I ran out of ideas, so had to stick offal into google, just so I could find something else!
Although I've now discovered something called Blood tongue, and I quite want to try it...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:26, Reply)

I shall look out for that at the German Market
it sounds nommy.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:29, Reply)

Really does, doesn't it?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Talk to her.
People make mistakes, have bad days, make odd judgement calls. So have a word - there's good reasons you're friends. Either that or stab her in the face with a fork.
Noel would like to assure readers that stabbing people in the face is a bad thing.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:15, Reply)

Yeah there's not enough flesh and too much bone.
Go for the kidneys if you get both they'll probably die before the ambulance arives.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 15 Dec 2010, 13:18, Reply)