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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I wondered what was going on when that muppet Zane Lowe was talking all over all of the songs he played this morning
why does he do it?

also, I have never heard him play a single good song.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:37, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I wonder why anyone even lets him breath.

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:41, Reply)
the same could be said of everyone who works at Radio 1
they're all fucking shit.

I only turned off Radio 4 because I was getting bored with them banging on about VAT
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:43, Reply)
What's going on with the vee ay tee?
Up from 17 and a bit to twenty!
stupid government making me pay more
Think I may go and have a shit on their door

this amazing moment of politicalness stuff was brought to you by the Monster Munching Badger Party
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:45, Reply)
I don't know how I feel about it
they've got to make up the deficit somehow I suppose.

what I really want is for Al to tell us what he thinks.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:48, Reply)
Al is probably still stuffing his face

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:51, Reply)
I'm eating an apple actually

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:54, Reply)
i was going to have an apple for lunch...
... it ended up being a hot falafel wrap and wholemeal rice salad (with chilli flakes and toasted almonds), now i can't move. humph.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:57, Reply)
Yeah you do

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:53, Reply)
Yep.
I hope Chris Moyles goes first, the fat, unfunny, useless fucking twat.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:50, Reply)
He appears to be a cunt of the highest order

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:43, Reply)
I like him.

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:44, Reply)
he'd be one of the least offensive on Radio 1
if he didn't talk all over the fucking songs
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:45, Reply)
least offensive on Radio 1
is like calling someone a high-functioning Downs. It's the best you get but it's still not great
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:47, Reply)
a perfect metaphor then

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:50, Reply)
Hello there.
Happy New Year.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:52, Reply)
hello darling monty
happy new year xx
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:56, Reply)
where's my happy new year?
or am I still in the doghouse? I've forgotten...
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:59, Reply)
i think you were suitably grovelling
so you are forgiven. but not forgotten.

did you have a good new year, not pining after my pencil skirt tooooo badly were you??
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:00, Reply)
splendid!
I did have a grand new year, and managed to get you and your skirt out of my head long enough to appreciate how nice my mrs looked.

More importantly though, I looked the business, particularly while wearing amy hat and playing the drums.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:02, Reply)
Amy hat?
Just know that I would totally be Paintsmashing Amy Winehouse straddling your head right now if I wasn't busy CATCHING CRIMINALS.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:04, Reply)
hehe
a shame you are busy then
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:14, Reply)
you should have bought her a pencil skirt for christmas
i was really tempted to buy a new sexy one in selfridges over the weekend, because my old ones are now falling off me, hoorah. but it was leather with a bit of a long slit going on, and i thought my boss might not approve, somehow.

are there fb pics of you rocking the casbah then??
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:06, Reply)
He actually bought her a pencil for Christmas
because he is a miserly, evil shitbag.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:10, Reply)
Leathery with a long slit?
Have you considered cosmetic surgery?
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:10, Reply)
a wee bit of vejazzling
will sort that right out. Perhaps a touch of moisturiser.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:13, Reply)
A clothes peg or two left on overnight can do wonders

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:15, Reply)
funny you should say that
depending on what happens IRL, i may regale bore you all with the tale of the peruvian plastic surgeon...
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:14, Reply)
Did he snort coke off your breasts, while telling you how he could reduce the upcoming sag on then?

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:16, Reply)
yeah
he suggested tying a rope to each nipple and hoisting it around the back of my neck. said it was the only way.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:19, Reply)
I think we might subscribe to the same websites...

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:27, Reply)
Does he specialise in nose reconstruction?

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:16, Reply)
ironically that is kind of the point of the story
although not in the way you meant!
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:18, Reply)
I have a feeling if I ever meet her, and she remembers my remarks, I might need him...

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:27, Reply)
we had an abstemious christmas
because we are skint, so skirts were out of the question. She did get herself a nice dress the other day, but that is because her sister is getting married a bit later this year.

There are indeed pics. You can view them my going to pics of me on facebook.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:13, Reply)
that's my evening sorted then
well, after such other excitements as the gym and washing, anyway.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:15, Reply)
try and ignore the fact that I appear to be wearing slippers
and if you can't do that then at least appreicate that they coordinate with the rest of what I am wearing.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:17, Reply)
slippers???
this has just taken priority over my washing
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:18, Reply)
Vippers in slippers...

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:20, Reply)
this has a peculiarly catchy appeal

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:23, Reply)
just like me

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:24, Reply)
I found they went excellently with smart trousers, shirt, tie, waistcoat and hat

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:23, Reply)
And to you, sweetness

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:04, Reply)
Thanks Monty
how are you?
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:57, Reply)
Apparently he is surprisingly OK in person
and 'knows his hip hop'.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:48, Reply)
Then again, doesn't Tim Westwood have a near encyclopedic knowledge of Hip-Hop?
That doesn't make him any less of a twat.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:51, Reply)
I bet he talks over songs in person as well
afternoon Mr B. Good christmas etc.?
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:51, Reply)
That's what hip hop is you spastic.

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:53, Reply)
Hahaha!

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:57, Reply)
No
This is hip hop.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:57, Reply)
Not bad sir - yours?

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:03, Reply)
very nice thanks

(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:11, Reply)
Ok Monty, you might think that
But look at what he says are 'Masterpieces'
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:01, Reply)
I have no opinion on him
other than he is foreign and therefore a cunt.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:09, Reply)
Nothing wrong with Zane Lowe
apart from a little over exuberance sometimes.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:54, Reply)
nothing wrong with over-exuberance
but talking over the songs all the time is shit, and as I mentioned before, I have never once heard him play a good song.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 14:57, Reply)
I don't believe you V man
sounds like one of those over exaggerated internet claims you hear about to me.
(, Tue 4 Jan 2011, 15:00, Reply)

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