Looks like I won't be going back to Libya anytime soon.
Should you be stockpiling baked beans and bottled water in case the uprising spreads to whatever dull cul-de-sac you inhabit? I was all set for the Zombie Apocolypse but this global unrest thing might mean new plans.

Who would you put up against the wall, come the revolution?

Alt: anyone want to buy some Gaddafi memorabilia?
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:47, 120 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I think it's a joke,
It's not exactly hard for europe to extend a no fly zone over libya. What's the UN even doing.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:49, Reply)

What exactly would they do though
if Libya were to continue to use fighter jets to murder it's own citizens?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:50, Reply)

have a bunga bunga party, I'll wager

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:51, Reply)

POTD

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:09, Reply)

aiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeee

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:11, Reply)

They would put a no fly zone in place
and engage any of their jets/helicopters with their much better missiles from about 10 miles away.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Oh really? Do you really think that a European country will engage in a demonstrable act of war against the Libyan military?
I don't think that's going to happen is it.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:57, Reply)

call-me-dave has already disappeared up the egyptian arse
they'll have to send clegg out to libya
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:11, Reply)

It was officially requested by the Libyan delegation to the UN

(PsychoChomp, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:14, Reply)

I know
but which country is actually going to fire a missile at a libyan fighter jet? It won't be Italy, since Bellusconi is Gaddafis best mate. And I don't think any of the other countries really has the stomach for a war over something which won't affect them.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:21, Reply)

But we're in the mighty morphin' save-people-from-despots club.
"We topple dictators and regimes!"
sometimes
when there's oil and smack
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:31, Reply)

It's nuts.
Amazing how the UK can invade another country on some flimsy pretence for humanitarian concern and yet do fuck all when an unhinged dictator starts bombing civilian protesters.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:52, Reply)

Let's be fair
they have bombed the fuck out of him before. They like to spread their bomb-based love around, the UK government.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Yeah. They're the STD of the developed nations.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:54, Reply)

Ain't it just

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:57, Reply)

Ugh
Just started watching Al Jazeera now. I've been putting it off all day.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:52, Reply)

*awaits Monty making his joke*

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

*waits patiently*
This really is fucking horrible. I hope that meltyfaced cunt is torn limb from limb by dwarf hamsters.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

His son did a degree here,
but it's neeeeever mentioned.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:57, Reply)

They all do
That's how I'm friends with a member of the Bruneian royal family.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:59, Reply)

Did you let them have a go on your "Munchy Box"?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:01, Reply)

Not likely
But I did cook christmas dinner for him and his missus the year before last.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:02, Reply)

He took her up the broon-eye

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:09, Reply)

He stopped when he found a sultan(a) lodged in his japper.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:10, Reply)

found a sultana lodged in his japper +realised the lube was pig fat
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Indianmutinyof1857lolz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:35, Reply)

All the despots send their kids to the West for schooling.

( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:59, Reply)

It is, he gave one of the london unis a shitload of money, they said they would give it back if they hadn't already spent it.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:06, Reply)

I mean it's never mentioned round 'ere

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:22, Reply)

That's because they weren't Scouse and they weren't dead
so nobody is giving them a minutes silence.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:24, Reply)

Like any scousers even KNOW he was here doing a degree.
If he wasn't in the Richmond having a pint of mild, he wasn't worth knowing.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:32, Reply)

*leaves revolting teddy from Clinton's*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:36, Reply)

It has to be the one with the blue nose and the stitching on his heart
heart hart
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

I'm going to stockpile bleach
so I always have a clean toilet in case I need to invite people round.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

toilet ringpiece
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:54, Reply)

It removes the musky odour too.

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:58, Reply)

Top idea.
That way you'll also ensure the survival of the species.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:54, Reply)

I'll just trade my good looks and sexual prowess for food and water.
Come the revolution there's a couple of guys that can go to hell but mostly I'm the forgiving sort.
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

You'll have so much food and water you'll be the queen of the north west.

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Hell yeah!
Stick with me Al and you'll be fine.
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

*sticks*

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:58, Reply)

You can be in charge of stockpiling lube.
I'm going to need a quite a bit.
( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:00, Reply)

The Saturdays, oh you didn't mean it in that way did you.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:54, Reply)

It's super-happy-fun time in the Islamic world at the moment, ain't it?

( Kroney, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

No, but I'd like some Yasser Arafat crisps.
They looked boss.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Are they falafal flavoured?

( girlinthehole, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:01, Reply)

Salt n Sheikh.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:04, Reply)

I prefer his peas.
ARAFAT PEAS!!11!!!!! LIKE MARROWFAT!!!!!!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:06, Reply)

I've gone off those and I used to love them,
I used to hate mushy peas and now I love them.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:23, Reply)

But mushy peas are just Marrowfat peas
that have been cooked for a while
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:24, Reply)

And the texture is totally different

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:33, Reply)

...in saline solution and shitloads of sugar.
Nice one, povvos.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:36, Reply)

Not everyone makes them like that

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:39, Reply)

I've just put in Band of Brothers, never seen it before but it's HBO
so can't be shit. Plus it will get me in the mood for this war we're about to have by the sounds of it.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:02, Reply)

Someone I know is in that.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:05, Reply)

that's quite cool, is it a part that's significant enough to watch out for?
or just a walk on background kind of thing?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:07, Reply)

Yes I think so.
He was also in Snatch and is playing Al Capone soon. His name is Stephen Graham.
www.imdb.com/name/nm0334318/

I know his wife really. She worked for me a few years ago.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:16, Reply)

he is famous, good actor.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:28, Reply)

People who go on about zombies.
Alt: yes please
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:05, Reply)

I prefer vampires.
Not that Twilight shit though.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:07, Reply)

I find either to be monumentally tedious
*yawns languidly before hailing a Hackney carriage to gentlemen's club in St James*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:12, Reply)

I wish the world was like this.

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:23, Reply)

Montys world is EXACTLY like this
if you came over to England we could show you.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:23, Reply)

does her wear breeches?
I'd quite fancy a bloke that wore a cravat and breeches.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:26, Reply)

I am a dissipated Victorian gentleman idler.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:38, Reply)

It's grim.
I've been out to Libya a couple of times for work and it's such a beautiful country with an amazing history but with a bizarre way of life - police escorts, conversations with probable spies, vast oil fields in the desert, murals everywhere, the supposed remains of IRA training camps. Actually, lots in common with Norn Iron. Except the oil fields.

It's just horrendous to see such ruthless fucking barbarism.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:06, Reply)

My mother went there on her own.
Loved it, she did.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:07, Reply)

Aye, it's fantastic.
An archaeologist's wet dream.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:08, Reply)

my friend said that
she said it was v surreal to be swimming in this beautiful place whilst there were soldiers with guns marauding around the cliff top
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:10, Reply)

Greek and Roman shizzle everywhere,
no tour guides...no tours. Magic.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:12, Reply)

yep - Greek, Roman
and some of the most amazing rock art in the world.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:19, Reply)

So the polar opposite of this, then:


Who the fuck is that on the right? Simon Weston?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:23, Reply)

You git, I was looking for something from David Oxtoby.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:25, Reply)

MY EYES!!!
OH GOD, MY EYES!!
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:30, Reply)

At this point in time I absolutely do not give a fuck about Libya
I am concerned with the health of my pet rat Eric, England's piss-poor performance in the field against the fucking Netherlands and what I'm having for lunch, in that order.

No offence to any Libyans present

Alt: Monty
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:09, Reply)

It all boils down to the same thing
Abuse of power by those who will never pay for their crimes. The rich do it all the time, if it's not overt like firing upon their own citizens, it's covert things like the cunts in Wall Street or those in ivory towers the world over who lie, cheat and steal every day.

Injustice is everywhere, but I'm more enraged by the white collar crime than the despots.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Christ, everyone's having a go at RSwipe today

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Well, it's her own fault
being seduced by the devils wallet.

What makes it worse it her utter incompetence when it comes to money, at least if you're going to be a bastard and rake in the millions, make it worthwhile, don't piss it up the wall on £10 boxes of salad.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:18, Reply)

Oh I don't know
There's an argument there that if she spends as much of her life as she does making that money, then she has the right to spend it how she will.

Honestly, I can't say that I'd be that much better with money if I had that much of it. Money's value is entirely relative.

The griping about taxation is perhaps edging towards being rich, but whatever. Fair play to her.
( Kroney, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:24, Reply)

you wouldn't spend it on a fucking salad would you?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:25, Reply)

I spend about 3 or 4 quid on lunch a day
that's probably a much larger percentage of my wage than ten quid a day is of hers.
( Kroney, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:26, Reply)

probably
you digusting fucking pauper
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:36, Reply)

Woe =(

( Kroney, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

to be fair
i would consider a surf board a total waste of money, it is indeed all relative!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:36, Reply)

it would be a waste of money to you
because you wouldn't use it. Whereas I could use a salad and would consider £10 to be way too much.

It's more a case that I just wouldn't spend that on lunch anyway. Mine probably costs less than £2.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

"piss it up the wall on £10 boxes of salad", what?
You're implying here that she's going broke because of it, and who are you to say what qualifies as "pissing up the wall" and "wise spending" for her?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:30, Reply)

Well for one thing, she's always complaining about being broke at the end of the month
and for another, I'm taking the piss. I still think £10 for a salad is a bit much though.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:31, Reply)

Don't ruin my fun, Al
I haven't got out my white knight tunic in ages.
( Kroney, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:33, Reply)

how dare you take the piss out of something so dear to my heart
the demise of that fucking salad place has broken it into little pieces. i'm having to schlep up to m&s today and it's NOT THE SAME.

not the- ooooh. lemon meringue and white chocolate cookies. they might have to be mine.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:35, Reply)

I was kidding
Bitching about RSwipe's repeated treatise' on how much she earns/spends is like going off on one about how Chompy has no right to claim he's clever or witty
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:30, Reply)

Really? I think the kind like the african generals who send their troops to rape and murder civilians, feed children smack and give them guns, are way way worst than someone who's fiddle accounts.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:27, Reply)

I'm with you on that, Gonz.

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:31, Reply)

*raises fist in solidarity*

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:32, Reply)

me three
although both are bad
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:33, Reply)

Those African Generals are monsters, but they inevitably get overthrown
Those who 'fiddle accounts' (I'm talking about the billions of dollars of fraud, that arguably caused the global recession) will never get convicted, because they sit above the law.
Edit: This article infuriates me.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:31, Reply)

I still don't think that making money dishonestly
or even in the case of many of these people, perfectly legally, could be compared to ordering your soldiers to carry out mass rape and mutilation. Especially since many of those people will never be convicted.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:33, Reply)

It's all injustice, which I hate
But I'm desensitised to the horrors that happen in these African countries, whereas I am not desensitised to the Ivory Tower greed.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

I think the ones who do it for personal gain, such as the MPs Expenses thing are far worst, as they were in a possition of trust.
Those who are hired to make sure their employeer they have to pay the least into the system, like taxes, are doing what their job is intitled _and_ is within the confines of the law.... a good accountant pays their own wage.

And those who do it for personal gain, like moving money out of a company and into their own pockets, get cault out eventually
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

The link I posted goes some way to explain why the top end ones won't get caught
The article is very long though, and I admit is only one side of the argument, but it makes for compelling reading.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:39, Reply)

Ach well,
as long as your pet rat Eric isn't gunned down from a model plane, the entire England team aren't burnt out or crushed by tanks, and you don't have to eat cous cous for lunch then you're probably fine.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:18, Reply)

This is exactly my attitude
Thank you for understanding
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:27, Reply)

I've been in contact with the Sun over their headline for when Gaddafi is enventually toppled.
I thought "Gaddafi Fucked!" was right up there with "Gotcha!"
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:12, Reply)

I still can't believe they didn't go with my Hendrix headline:
'Rock star chokes in Jimi riddle'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:13, Reply)

I'd publish that.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:17, Reply)

Come the Revolution
First up against the wall will be whoever knocked me off balance last night so I fell over.

Then probably every tv show judge ever
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:13, Reply)

Buy bigger shoes.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpoGy_WIcCY
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:18, Reply)

You need some cooking shoes (c) Gonz 2011

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:33, Reply)

Now what i want to know
is that how I, who is not working, cannot keep up with the conversation or find time to post. Yet the rest of you who are pretending to work can.
Am I just too old for all this?
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:25, Reply)

S'lunch
At 2pm I'll be back to occaisional snipes.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:29, Reply)

Passes zimmerframe and colostomy bag

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:30, Reply)

I am fucking old so no.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:33, Reply)

we're just better

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:35, Reply)

May be this is it
I have been making jam and painted a chest of drawers.

I am also waiting for the plumber, where do you think he might be?
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:37, Reply)

filming porn

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:38, Reply)

He's just finishing up
then he'll have a couple of viagra and be right over to adjust your inlet valve.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:43, Reply)

He'll need to flush her drains and unblock her wastepipe

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:44, Reply)

What kind of paint did you use?
I have some wooden shelves to piant and I always pick the "wrong type"
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:43, Reply)

I used the one I found in the cellar.
It is a Satinwood from B and Q. I'd used it before for a sideboard and it's lasted quite well.
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:49, Reply)

Satinwood eh?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 13:52, Reply)

One word of advice
Don't do what I have just done at put drawers in a chest of drawers without putting the knobs on first.

yfrog.com/h2iaevj
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 14:01, Reply)