Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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This isn't /links and I'm not a sex offenderNonetheless;
www.guardian.co.uk/society/2011/feb/24/british-drug-use-falling
Because I know none of you will bother to read this, it says "The number of young people taking drugs has fallen by 30% in 15 years." The key word here is YOUNG. It's not that less people are taking drugs - it's that 15 years ago, Monty was 22.
What do you blame your fellow B3tans for?
Alt: who'd play you in a movie about your life? I call Clary
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:09, 129 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I blame you for /OT being shit.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:14,
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Why's that? Spunk in your eyes?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:16,
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Matthew Kelly's controversial pilot show that never got commissioned.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:18,
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He looks fucking terrifying these days*fears*
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:23,
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I dont like to talk about itLets just say his "Stars in your Arse" game wasn't that good
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:26,
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tonight matthew, i'm going to be........... badly torn boy!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:28,
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hahaha!I've been pissing out my ass
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:29,
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you're on form todaydo i want a burrito or a cous-cous salad to nom for lunch please?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:20,
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I love cous cous but it get's bloody everywhere.I'd go for the burrito.
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girlinthehole, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:21,
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and you have a grammar pass(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:29,
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Yes but I only like to show it for major grammar fuck ups.(
girlinthehole, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:30,
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Burrito it is.(and thank you)
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:22,
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thanks all.......burrito is is. i think i will go for falafel and coriander rice with houmous or sour cream. the other option is roasted haloumi and veg.
if you eat meat, though, the menu is HUGE. pork, beef, steak, chicken, lamb...
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:27,
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They both sound lovely!Needs more meat though
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:28,
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it is a brilliant place, i love itbut you have to go early or late, otherwise the Q goes clean up holborn :(
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:29,
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THE FUCKING WHAT GOES FUCKING WHERE?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:32,
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the fucking burrito goes down my fucking throatomg that was AMAZING. although they had run out of haloumi and veg, so i had to have chilli instead. it burns.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:52,
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I blame my fellow B3tans for my lack of love life.Alt: Julie T Wallace.
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girlinthehole, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:14,
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Some akward conversation with real life people about rapeafter some b3tans thought that sort of thing was acceptable to put on my status.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:17, Reply)
don't do the crime if you can't do the time(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:20,
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denied/suppliedoops sorry Jeff
He who observed it served it.
He who detected it, ejected it.
Whoever rhymed it crimed it.
Whoever spoke last set off the blast.
The smeller's the feller.
He who inculpated promulgated.
The one who said the verse just made the atmosphere worse.
Whoever's poking fun is the smoking gun
He who accuses blew the fuses.
He who refuted it, tooted it.
He who articulated it, particulated it.
He who deduced it produced it.
She who sniffed it biffed it.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:23,
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When you're sliding into first
And your pants begin to burst
diarrhea, diarrhea
When you're sliding into two
And your pants are filled with goo
diarrhea, diarrhea
When you're sliding into third
And you feel a greasy turd
diarrhea, diarrhea
When you're sliding into home
And your pants are filled with foam
diarrhea, diarrhea
When you're getting in a state
cos' you've left it very late
diarrhea diarrhea
When it comes out of your bum
like a bullet from a gun
diarrhea diarrhea
When it runs down your leg
like a scrambled egg
diarrhea diarrhea
You know its not very funny
but it's very hot and runny
diarrhea diarrhea
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:32,
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More of an 'English Country Garden' kinda guy, myself*fertilises the ants*
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:34,
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i was just saying that you only get a reputation for a reasoncliches only become cliches because they are TRUE.
now you had to go and bring your pestilential flatulence into the equation. not cool, man. not cool at all.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:21,
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I'll bet you do. On a nightly basis.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:20,
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Wait, Monty is 37? I thought he was in his 50's!I blame Chompy for posting that shit news link
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:24,
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37 in earth years137 in bitter twisted hate rage years
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:27,
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it's not just the size of her vagina that is measured on a galactic scale(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:37,
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*calls rent-a-thug*Hi, yeah I need you to rekick some wing mirrors off. If you can smear some jam over the bonnet as well that would be grand
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:38,
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my car is scraping along as it isI had to take the fuse out of the ABS to make it driveable
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:40,
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And I always thought the Prius was a reliable car(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:42,
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I have no doubt it isless so my Seat.
Never let Spaniards get their hands on your car.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:43,
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I'll have to blame Monty and Lustyfor me being totally unable to do any meaningful work the day after we went out. I also blame them (well Tayyabs) for the chemical warfare in the car on the 300 mile drive home
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:24,
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The fact that I now find it entirely appropriate to call people cunts for the smallest indiscretion against me.You bunch of bastards.
Alt: Tim Curry
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:26,
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I blame you for the abundance of grammatical abhorrences wreaked upon this forum daily"It's not that less people are taking drugs"?
"Less people"? "Less people"? Christ on a fucking Segway, how many fucking times? It's "FEWER PEOPLE," YOU DISGUSTING BUMWRANGLER.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:26, Reply)
I am SO happy you got here in time to read that(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:27,
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Oh do piss off,It's a logical conclusion to the extension ad absurdum of the phrase "Christ on a bike." I shall be sure to find another, more esoteric mode of transport for the next occasion on which I use that phrase, if that will appease you.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:30, Reply)
Christ in a tuktuk?bike - rickshaw - tuktuk
I'm claiming extra credit for showing my working out.
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Kroney, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:32,
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Foxy rides one of these which I think were called ITs.
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:32,
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these which I think were called ITs.
men. Hard.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:38,
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Might I suggest"Christ on a T-Rex with laser eyes that's piloting a Harrier Jump Jet with two supermodels on each wing totally lezzing off with each other"?
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:32,
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This is greatIt just rolls off the tongue
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:34,
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I imagine it's quite hard to lezz off on the wing of a jet that's doing mach 3.Just saying.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:35, Reply)
Harriers are sub-sonic/pedant
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:36,
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Jesus' Harrier can go up to Mach FUCK YEAH!(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:37,
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That's why Jesus only has committed, professional rug--munchers(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:36,
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HmmI'm not convinced by the article or the statistics, but there we go. I blame my fellow b3tans for the fact that I sit on my arse reading b3ta all day instead of doing some bloody work.
Alt - Zooey Deschanel.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:33, Reply)
And, by proxy, BerkRUN, WOMAN, RUN FOR THE HILLS
I must concede that you have excellent taste in Hollyowood actresses
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:37, Reply)
If I could look like anyone I'd look like her or Katy Perry.Being a foxy brunette I see this as only a small stretch of the imagination. Ahem.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:37,
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Katy Perry has marvellous boobagebut very poor taste in men. And Zooey Deschanel is gorgeous.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:41, Reply)
^thismy mate's mrs looks like Zooey Deschanel. He is a lucky bastard.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:42,
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I shudder when i think of that dirty crab going near her(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:43,
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I have gone right off her since that.I prefer not to have to put a woman through sheep dip before I'm sure she's clean.
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Kroney, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:46,
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making me look like a crazy person with no real friends when I say "oh em gee I was talking online the other day and blah blah"alt: I don't bloody know, I don't look like any celebrity I know
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Lisette von Falcon, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:33,
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This^Trying to explain I was talking to a blouse and cunt lips online often sounds just a touch odd
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:35,
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Nor do II only nommed Clary because I knew someone would draw the parallel so it might as well be me
My profile pics have been compared to John Barrowman (gay), Tom Cruise (let's be honest) and Johnny Galecki (no idea). All of which are foundless
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:39, Reply)
hold on, hold onyou "nommed" Clary?
I bet you thought he tasted fucking great.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:43,
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some women.not ginger ones
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:48,
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Better than Jimmy fucking Nailwho someone said I looked like. She's lying!
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:43,
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I blame them for my itchy feet.Alt: Julie Walters or Sunetra Sarker.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:35,
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This is more a timeline than a series for strikethroughs(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:50,
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I found an actor who Darth looks like.theberry.com/2010/07/06/afternoon-eye-candy-matthew-goode-21-photos/
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girlinthehole, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 14:55,
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Alt:Nathan Fillion or Sean Bean, since those are the actors that my missus wishes I looked like.
Woe.
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Kroney, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 15:08,
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I don't think anyone would stoop so low as to play me in a film of my lifeBut I've been told I look like someone in Ghost World. I haven't seen it though, so I don't know.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 15:12, Reply)
I just googled itShe has her hair in a bob and glasses. She looks nothing like me.
(, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 15:13, Reply)
I can see where they're coming from, but I don't agree(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 24 Feb 2011, 15:25,
Reply)
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