Although this is a better news story
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-12966698
People are mental.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:02, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Dunno
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-12966217
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:03, Reply)

There's always something a bit wrong about PE teachers.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:03, Reply)

Hey kids, just call me the 'Salford Stallion'

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:05, Reply)

Alright 'Salf'?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:07, Reply)

*Fonz thumbs*

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:08, Reply)

One of mine was an ex-Wales rugby player
who made me break the ice on a frozen muddy puddle with my nose by making me do pressups and putting his foot on the back of my head.

For 'talking'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:06, Reply)

I bet you were talking about music.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 13:20, Reply)

My school had an ex-England player who was superb, a really good laugh, encouraged you to work harder.
And we had someone who'd been involved in Scotland's coaching, he was a cunt.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 13:21, Reply)

I read that this morning
what a nasty piece of work.
(berk, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:06, Reply)

Northerner in 'is cunt' shocker.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:07, Reply)

Oi!

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:09, Reply)

^ look, here's another one!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:11, Reply)

Fuck off you drug addled old hippy.
Wuv oo
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:12, Reply)

*mwah*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Our next visit from the London b3ta posse
will include a trip to Bamburgh Castle. Despite having lived near it forever, I have never been. This is something I need to rectify.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:15, Reply)

Yay!

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:16, Reply)

So, set a date then...

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:17, Reply)

Hah! Yes, I am WELL GOOD at organising things.
I shall consult the troops.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:26, Reply)

I have recieved NO MESSAGE of this
I am OUTRAGED
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:41, Reply)

and so you SHOULD be

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:56, Reply)

I went for a smoke.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 13:00, Reply)

I am well up for some of that.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:17, Reply)

Could you bear to be around Northerners for a whole weekend though?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:18, Reply)

I'll bring an SS dagger and if I get too annoyed I'll start stabbing people.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:20, Reply)

Oh Monty.
That's just an ordinary night out around these parts.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:21, Reply)

*looks hopeful*
I can bring cake...
(berk, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:30, Reply)

It's a deal!

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:32, Reply)

YAY!

(berk, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:33, Reply)

WOO!

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:44, Reply)

The defence put forward about him made me angry.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:07, Reply)

'In Salford this is normal'...?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Adam Watkins, defending, said Drake did not coerce, bully, belittle or manipulate the girls... He has more recently had a growing awareness of how wrong, inappropriate and potentially abusive and damaging these relationships were
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:10, Reply)

Oh that's alright then you fucking nonce.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:11, Reply)

Talking to yourself again, eh?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:12, Reply)

I didn't even sleep with under 16s when I was under 16.
edit: that's not a great defense... I'm not a nonce ok.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:15, Reply)

I did.
/nonce
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:16, Reply)

I bet you didn't text smiley faces to them though.
Ultimate noncery.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:19, Reply)

No, he just gazzed them cock pictures.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:20, Reply)

You forgot this
:o)
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:20, Reply)

I can't wait to abuse my position of authority and fuck you right in the ringpiece
;) The Salford Stallion
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:22, Reply)

More recently as in 'since we advised him to say this', perhaps?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:11, Reply)

+ when he got caught...

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:11, Reply)

I don't think you get to use that in mitigation unless the last sentence finishes with
"so he stopped".
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:12, Reply)

Alright Wooks?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Not bad chap, yourself?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Taking a day off work due to family stuff.
But otherwise OK. Enjoying dicking around on the internet, tbh.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:15, Reply)

You don't need a day off work to dick around on the internet.
*sweeping arm gestures*
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:17, Reply)

I do, work blocks all the *good* sites.
Still, come the 30th June I can dick around on the internet to my heart's content. Well, until the missus berates me for not pulling my weight around the house while she's at work.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:19, Reply)

As long as you've got dinner on the table by 3am, she won't have a leg to stand on.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:23, Reply)

Hahahahahahahahahaha!

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:24, Reply)

*giggles*

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:34, Reply)

oh god you're both here

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:42, Reply)

Sharing nicely, so we are :)
*chest bumps*
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:45, Reply)

I like chest bumps.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:49, Reply)

Best of all the bumps!
*chest bumps Noel*
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Woooooooooooooooo!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:56, Reply)

*gropes*

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:55, Reply)

PHWOOOOAR! :)

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:56, Reply)

love the judge's name though
JUDGE TIMOTHY MORT

"hi, I'm Tim Death"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:11, Reply)

Fuck off Pratchett.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:11, Reply)

while it is Pratchett-esque
that's not what I was going for
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:13, Reply)

Reminds me of my old German teacher
He was just over thirty, and nobbing quite a large number of students. I think the staff knew it but couldn't get anyone to talk about it. They got him because my mate (who thought he 'loved' her) dobbed him in after he refused to stop seeing the others.

I don't think I've ever been so angry at another human being. Well, not one I knew personally, anyway.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 5 Apr 2011, 12:28, Reply)