And as promised...

Here's a new thread!

I am all floaty after having a disastrous session having blood taken. Tea and toast made me better.

What did you have for elevenses?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:29, 100 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

MOAR BEEEEEEEEER and a fag

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)

Good girl. Keep at it!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Near the top,
if you've ever wanted to read baldmonkey and gonzo /fiction then go on talk now.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:38, Reply)

I'm both sickened and amused by that

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:47, Reply)

I've got a hard on.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:48, Reply)

Well done you

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:49, Reply)

*three thumbs up*

(PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:00, Reply)

Epic

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:11, Reply)

I had a toasted tea-cake.
Lovely it was too.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)

What do you mean by 'tea-cake'?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)

Good

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)

What did you think I meant?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:34, Reply)

maybe one of those horrible mallow things

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)

Ah, these...


I quite like them. Especially if they've got a bit of jam in them.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)

Ugh
they're worse than the puns. Vile things.
(berk, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:39, Reply)

I've not had one for years.
I might have to buy some now and see if they taste of childhood birthday parties.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:42, Reply)

pfft
that taste is of party rings, and orange jelly in orange skin boats
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:45, Reply)

Don't forget the cheese and pineapple hedgehog
presented on half a tin-foil covered grapefruit.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:48, Reply)

chessboard sandwiches
chocolate muffins and fairy cakes
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:51, Reply)

White dog shit.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:51, Reply)

Wow your parents were cruel

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:58, Reply)

Tunnucks Teacakes FTW!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:40, Reply)

Nope, some people call bread rolls or cobs 'tea cakes'.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:45, Reply)

some people
Or David Blunkett?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:48, Reply)

Hahahha

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:50, Reply)

Nothing snacking is for fatties.
Also nombies www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tees-13070369
(PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)

heard this earlier, personally i think it's hilarious
Why can't people see the funny side of stuff?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)

because they're grieving I would think.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)

meh, they probably need cheering up then

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)

I would love a funeral home that offered to put a couple of rounds through the deceaseds' brainpan
"just to be sure".
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:14, Reply)

What that story doesn't tell you in that before that poster went up
The BBC had used to the advertising space before them for this*.

www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006r9ys

*May contain fibs.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)

I thought that was hilarious
I keep meaning to watch that show. It's supposed to be zombieloltastic.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:34, Reply)

It's not very funny
but it's pretty good and worth a watch.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)

banana, twix and tangerine

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)

I want a twix
I want foooooood
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:42, Reply)

I ate my lunch

(Bazongaloid, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)

But now you'll be hungry later

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)

Ar Ey, Ar Kid!
mr b3th has a grandchild round to help him clear out his study. This appears to involve moving everything out of the study and giving it to me. I do not approve of this behaviour.

Why have people been stabbing you? *worries*

I haven't had elevenses yet, but there may be a banana in the kitchen with my name on it.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)

I love writing on bananas

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:36, Reply)

I like giving them faces.
I made a sceptical office banana a few weeks ago.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)

you need to get out more

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Out is shit!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:45, Reply)

Love it!
I would happily write on papaer made from banana skin everyday
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:39, Reply)

Whilst that is technically 'clearing out the study'.
it is also 'cluttering wherever it is B3th will have to keep this stuff'. Hmmm.

And blood, well, after weeks of it I think we're funnelling it down to low calcium/vitamin D deficiency. This is in fitting with my status as a vampire.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:36, Reply)

well, moving to Scotland should help with hte vitamin D deficiency
IDT!
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)

IDT?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)

I Don't Think!
playgroundlols
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:44, Reply)

Haha now I get it,
Mind you, even if I went to the Bahamas I'd have my factor 50 and a parasol.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:49, Reply)

I remember a certain person who, as a teenager, wouldn't leave the house on even the hottest summer day without wearing TWO t-shirts.
I think he may be part vampire himself.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:56, Reply)

And what with our celtic complexions...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:16, Reply)

I thought she was moving to London?
I've already been to scotland to have a fling, it didn't work out, I'm not doing that again.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:56, Reply)

Scotland is winning in the polls, but you never know]

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:16, Reply)

Your hubby is a grandad? oh lol.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:43, Reply)

he is also an OAP
almostnecrophilalols
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:45, Reply)

Doddgy ticker, 5 year bonds and debated probate?
I think I respect you more for this.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:52, Reply)

Friend at work buggered off home to Paris for the weekend
she has returned with french chocolate which I am trying desperately not to steal and scoff.

I am failing.
(berk, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)

If you don't want to eat that chocolte
you can give it to me. I'm hungry.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:40, Reply)

I do want to eat the chocolate
but she didn't buy it for just me, and I really ought to leave some for everyone else. But it's just so tasty good...
(berk, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:52, Reply)

Would it be wrong to put as the last point on my career plan for my manager, "profit"

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:34, Reply)

sounds perfectly reasonable to me
unless he is a miserable cunt with no sense of humour.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:36, Reply)

It's a she, I know mental!
They'll be driving next
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)

You work for a woman!?
What is the world coming to?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)

I know there'll be inter-racial schools soon!*
*fills in in Monty's absence
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:38, Reply)

steady on!
We don't want no darkies round here.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:46, Reply)

Yes
You should write: "loads of dirty money"
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:40, Reply)

It would be doubly good if he was planning to become an imram.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:44, Reply)

Ape, earlier.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:46, Reply)

That picture just makes me think of this post
Still makes me laugh every time
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:47, Reply)

hahahahahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:49, Reply)

Banana and
ginger and lemon biscuits. I'm eating the biscuits now.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Nothing yet.
I'm not hungry just yet. I might have sushi for late-lunch though.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:38, Reply)

Nothing for lunch yet
might have some houmous and sesame and onion biscuits a bit later though
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:44, Reply)

Instant coffee (black) and one of the "cupcakes*" that I found in the reduced aisle as I was picking up my lunch on the way in
Really living the high life here.

*_{I'm still having trouble coming to terms with this ghastly Americanism. As far as I can tell, it's just a fairy cake with extra butter. Like a gay Al in cake form.}
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:45, Reply)

It's a bun.
A fucking bun!
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:47, Reply)

Liking this^

(Bazongaloid, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:47, Reply)

I tend not to snack at work anymore
And if I fancy a snack at home, it's only ever Marmite on toast.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:46, Reply)

Marmite on toast. Bella's vagina
(Bazongaloid, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:47, Reply)

Nom nom nom

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:48, Reply)

tastes like swiss roll I guess

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:49, Reply)

Ha!
(Arctic roll, surely?)
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:55, Reply)

Tootsie Roll?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:00, Reply)

ham roll

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:03, Reply)

Ham toucher

(Bazongaloid, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:04, Reply)

That works the best.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:09, Reply)

AA can add the mayonnaise

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:15, Reply)

Needs less marmite

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:49, Reply)

There really should not be yeast products down there
*shudders*
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:50, Reply)

Especially not if it's that colour, either.

(berk, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:51, Reply)

*sings*
THRUSH!
Ah-aaaaah!
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:52, Reply)

SAVIOUR OF THE UNIVERSE!

(Bazongaloid, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:53, Reply)

FLAVOUR OF HER MOULDINESS!

(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:54, Reply)

I think this guy disagrees...

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:52, Reply)

I think that's my mate.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:04, Reply)

Hopefully he gets to mix in some Spaghetti, to compliment her festering dolmio sauce

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:52, Reply)

Oh...good...god O_o

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:55, Reply)

-vomits-

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:00, Reply)

I haven't eaten anything yet
I may eat some biscuits.

The only thing getting me through the week is getting some lusty lovin' on Saturday followed by probably screaming at the F1 quali with my fav b3tan ever. Oh and Wooks will probably be there too
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 11:59, Reply)

Fanta Zero and licqourice Fruitella.
I am all moody today and want to punch things.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:02, Reply)

A chicken and bacon wrap
from the sandwich lady. And a mini-muffin. My hangover is gone but now I just want to sleeeep.

And I'm supposed to be going to the gym after work.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 14 Apr 2011, 12:04, Reply)