Holy shit
Profile for acid_kewpie:
a member for 6 years, 6 months and 12 days

I had no idea this place existed until a few seconds ago.

So I can be all needy and wet here???
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:42, 99 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

fuck off

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:43, Reply)

is this /talk???

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:44, Reply)

No it's Rory.
He's always friendly like this.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:44, Reply)

You can be wet. Wet helps.
Profile for NOEL!:
has posted 438 stories and 17038 replies on question of the week
*holds head in hands*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:47, Reply)

your own Judge, Jury and Executioner?
Saves time at least, huh?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:54, Reply)

I hold myself accountable for my reaction to everything that I witness.
Life is easier that way.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:56, Reply)

A cute girl at work has come in on saturday to watch the painters as they're painting the office, and she'll be in by herself.
I'm tempted to go into work anyway on account of having loads and loads of time off this week, and she asked if I was coming in as she would be there on her loansome. I've finished all my work, but I could make something up and it would look really good.

I'm not going to get my hopes of for an entire sex fueled saturday in the office, which will tick _sooo_ many boxes on my ToDo list, but it might be alright.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:48, Reply)

so
you do the gentlemanly thing and say that you'll go in so she doesn't have to, right?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:53, Reply)

Oh no, she has to go anyway, weather I go or not.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:07, Reply)

and she's going to be nekked?

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:08, Reply)

If you go in
make sure your boss knows about it, so you can get a few brownie points for if you're off ill again.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:55, Reply)

He doesn't want brownie points from his boss.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:57, Reply)

but don't tell your boss
when you do that lass
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:58, Reply)

leap of something or other
But this has got me thinking about this story - www.scotclans.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/poo.jpg
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 19:59, Reply)

'temperance hall'

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:02, Reply)

Oh aye', he gets a lovely little email automaticlly when I adjust the code and put it up to the next level, so them coming through on a saturday would be a total win.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:06, Reply)

So this girl has got the painters in?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:10, Reply)

We're all about the needy and wet here.
Pull up a pouffe.
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:10, Reply)

BGB!
I've had beer and I'm feeling naughty. What should I do?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:11, Reply)

Give me a kiss.
No tongues though because Poppet wouldn't be happy.
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:12, Reply)

I got a pretty good kiss at the bash, I don't know if you'll remember though.
It was right between the time you told me you loved me and the next time you told me you loved me, and intimated that if she and I ever split up I knew where you were.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:17, Reply)

Oh fuck no : /
*pulls t-shirt over head and shames*
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:19, Reply)

I blushed and told you you'd embarrassed me, you threw your head back and cackled and brushed your hair from your eyes and said
"Right! Now to find someone else to embarrass!"
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:22, Reply)

Oh shit!!!
I'm sorry.
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:23, Reply)

Don't be, it was excellent!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:28, Reply)

In my defence I have been rather stirred up lately.

( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:30, Reply)

Steady frisky gal!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=CX-wQlTSD9Y
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:35, Reply)

Innit!
I'm bubbling over Roota.

Go and check out the totty on Springwatch. He's a bit short but lovely.
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:36, Reply)

You're only human.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:37, Reply)

Bobby or Darth?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:11, Reply)

I ordered one of those big tubs
of Man The Fuck Up, you know, like Whey Protein off of that rugby advert, but it got lost in a parcel depot near Newport Pagnell
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:15, Reply)

Man that sucks.
I'm allergic to man the fuck up. It brings me out in a rash.
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:16, Reply)

Fuck Newport Pagnell, every time I piss in the Great Ouse they get a homoeopathic dose of my awesome wee.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:18, Reply)

then get your knitting out
and have a good cry
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:18, Reply)

where've you been in all that time?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:18, Reply)

/calendar

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:19, Reply)

how embarrassing

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:23, Reply)

I just ate a moussaka-for-two.
I'm hard like Big Jimmy Nail.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:28, Reply)

is that the father in Lion King?

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:38, Reply)

Hahaha!

( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:39, Reply)

Oh! I thought someone shouted "Finish IT!!!"
What a mistake-a to make-a.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:41, Reply)

hakuna matata and all that

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:42, Reply)

I liked it when Timon and Pumbaa had their own show.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:43, Reply)

I prefer the penguins of madagascar
but to be fair, my favorite animated series of all time is Fanboy and Chum Chum so I feel like I'm cheating if I say I like anything else
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:44, Reply)

Remember Cow and Chicken?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:46, Reply)

barely

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:51, Reply)

I loved them

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:52, Reply)

I fucking loved Allo Allo.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:43, Reply)

allo
adieu
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:45, Reply)

My mum and dad have got rockery plants that look like Captain Bertorelli's hat plumes

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:46, Reply)

Ooo! there's a very nice man on Springwatch.
Not that Chris Packham? chappie.
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:28, Reply)

Him with the gillet?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:48, Reply)

Yup!
Lush!
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:49, Reply)

Not my cuppa.
Those owls are fucking FITNESS though.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:50, Reply)

damnit - I need pictures!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:52, Reply)

The one in the green jumper
www.bbc.co.uk/nature/uk/
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:54, Reply)

THe one in the blue shirt.
www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/natureuk/2011/05/springwatch-2011-has-started--.shtml
( girlinthehole, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:54, Reply)

nah
bit old and grizzled for my liking
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:56, Reply)

Fuckin ell he's the same age as me dad

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:56, Reply)

There's nothing wrong with a bit of the silver fox.
I bet David Essex is older than your Da, and you were frothing over him the other week.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:57, Reply)

I love him, but not like that
I mean I think he's very attractive but if I met him I'd just want a pint of shandy and a game of darts with him
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:59, Reply)

a pint of HAND shandy, more like.
fnar.....
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:00, Reply)

Oh you saucy little strumpet!
How are you anyway?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:01, Reply)

I may end up losing my septic thumb
I have finally strapped it up with a bit of savlon, and I can't bend it. I hadn't realised quite how many things required the use of opposable thumbs. For example, I can't disengage my handbrake with my left hand. This is awkward.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:02, Reply)

Shit mate, sure you don't need antibiotics or something?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:03, Reply)

It's possible.
I did it a week ago, and have only just started trying savlon. If that hasn't helped by Monday, I'll go see the quack.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:05, Reply)

Savlon cream or liquid?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:06, Reply)

I used the dry spray last night
and cream today.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:08, Reply)

Hope it improves

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:10, Reply)

Ta sis.
Any news on your ism?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:11, Reply)

Doctor's phoning me monday
to tell me which department wants me first
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:12, Reply)

As long as it isn't the Morgue
you'll be fine.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:14, Reply)

If it's the top floor, I'm fucked
That's where they keep the mad people.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:16, Reply)

Hit it with a thin dose of that shit every couple of hours while, leave it open to dry if it doesn't look horrendous
I've never had an external infection I couldn't solve with sudocrem.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:12, Reply)

Isn't that what they use for nappy rash?
Do you get nappy rash, Noel?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:14, Reply)

It's antiseptic cream.
Me and kid used to call it Magic Cream cos it fixes fucking everything. Including nappy rash, which I might add I've not had for at least three decades.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:16, Reply)

Whereas he'd want you
'to hold him close, don't let him go-ooh-ooh'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:00, Reply)

The little charmer

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:01, Reply)

No.
No, no, no.

Matt Baker, though - totally would.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:57, Reply)

I still have an odd thing about Andy Burnham

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:58, Reply)

*googles*
no, funny shaped face
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 20:58, Reply)

There's a thing about borstal on the telly.
Make me stop before it depresses me.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:05, Reply)

I'm watching it!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:08, Reply)

So am I.
I should just go and clean the flat and not watch.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:08, Reply)

I'd want tea and biscuits if I was having lessons with that weird woman.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:10, Reply)

Haha, "it wowt drorp orf"

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:11, Reply)

These kids have got it made.
*Sniffs the polish*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:12, Reply)

ooh nasty fight

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:14, Reply)

I wouldn't want to play pool with him.
(Although he is missing a trick by not putting the balls in a sock)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:16, Reply)

I thought that.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:17, Reply)

Those are quite like the kids they gave me to teach in Bridgwater.
The location says it all, really.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:18, Reply)

I'd die of fear

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:20, Reply)

That's pretty much why I had my almost nervous breakdown.
If I hadn't got out when I did, I would have been fucked.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:21, Reply)

Totally

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:21, Reply)

It's why I won't go back to secondary teaching
Primary or adult. Either of those I would quite happily do.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:23, Reply)

You should have used your flare!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:22, Reply)

If you get 'gold' status you get shit loads of stuff!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:18, Reply)

Can you imagine what you get for Platinum level?
They can probably offer a shitload of stuff because no-one ever gets that high.

That teacher is like a black River Song.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:20, Reply)

More chance of winning the Readers Digest prize draw than getting that!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 16 Jun 2011, 21:22, Reply)