Someone should prepare an "official" bash report
Ideally painting as many people as possible in a bad light, so that they feel compelled to set the record straight. Did Rachelswipe really beat Al unconscious? Did Gonz actually receive a full-body massage from three b3tans who have taken out a superinjunction to prevent their identities and even gender being revealed?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 16:34, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

So tempted...

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 17:13, Reply)

Ok then, I'll do my best, no doubt I'll forget some people.
• Clendrix was as great as ever, she's a bit swell to tell you the truth.
• Monty ran off at 11ish saying something about a rezided sigh about having to have sex this month and all he wants is a break from it, and how he wants to dump Lusty but doesn't know how to tell her.
• Wookie was counting down the moments 'till his birthday and celebrated with a wank in the toilets.
• Berk made some lovely scones and eye candy for everyone.
• Bill got drunk, and then more drunk.
• Lampers and Lamper's Friend and Amberly had a huge* orgy with SportsCrow**. Bill tried to come along, and as much as Lamper's Flatmate wanted him there, Bill was insistant in waiting in the bushes and watching and SC*** wasn't down with that.
• Raki, 'swipe, Berk and I think a few others had a blowjob competition where there was no clear winner except Enigmatic. I fished for an invite but didn't get one, because I figured out of all the women there, at least one of them would get self esteem issues about the ratio of boys-to-girls and that would be a perfect chance for me to friend-zone myself.
• BGB, Bloke With Awesome Facial Hair, DG, Chickenlady, TGB and everyone else who I haven't mentioned yet was also pressent and pleasent.

* Does 4 people count as a 'huge orgy' ? I donno, never been in one really, it's only one step up to a threesome really, it's essenchally the bare-minimum required amount of people for an orgy.
** Ok, I'm 50/50 if it's sportscrow or supreamcow, I get their usernames very confused.
*** Oh man, win, I could use the innitals, YEAH, TOTALLY MEANT THE RIGHT ONE, WHATEVER ONE IT IS.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 17:21, Reply)

The highlight of my weekend is buying some ASDA bubblegum flavoured ice lollies.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 17:25, Reply)

You paint such a good picture Gonz
I must bash at some point.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sun 3 Jul 2011, 17:37, Reply)

They're really really good ice lollies.
I think I would like for you to come to a bash at somepoint, just so.... you know....maybe possibly hopefully could be.... nah', you wouldn't.... Ok, I'll throw this out there, into the open, the wild blue yonder. We could meet up, enjoy a drink together, have a conversation like normal mostly-grown-ups. I promise if we hug I won't sniff your hair and sigh.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:03, Reply)

Do I have to change my user name again
to "Bloke With Awesome Facial Hair" or will you ever remember my name Gonz? I do so like it when they remember my name in the morning.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 3 Jul 2011, 17:40, Reply)

It's up to you really, I don't remember words begining with 'Qu' that well, I can only think of the word Quiz and Question.
And I know there are lots of words that start with 'Qu' because they even made a spelling rule about it, that a 'u' always follows a 'q'.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:05, Reply)

I promise I didn't google to get those two, I actually remembered those words.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:06, Reply)

I would like to breed you, monty and Berk together and I think we could recreate King Charles II.
King Charles II was the party king, his dad got fucked over by Cromwell, and everyone was like "yay, the king is gone, we can now all be free from the monarkee", but when Cromwell came about he banned people having fun in any shape or form, so the people were like Fuck This Shit and got KC2 involved who was like "YAY PARTY TIME".

He had your facial hair, Monty's tallness and lust for getting wasted and berk's georgous curly locks.

I imagine they didn't litterally say "yay party time", probably more "Huzzah, the partieth doest commith".
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:10, Reply)

So you want me and Monty to spit-roast Berk
in order to re-incarnate a long-dead party-king?

I'm not sure it'll work but damnit I'm game if Monty and Berk are.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:16, Reply)

I don't really know science that well, I don't know how it all works, I don't even understand how ballpoint pens work unless they create a vacum that pushes the ink down the ink-barrel an then the roller gets a bit of ink and that gets put on the paper.
Wait a sec, if that is how it works, then I guess I do know science.

Anyway, Berk is the scientiest agmonst us, so I imagine it's a matter of some sort of orgy*, OR, or, they extract the sperm directly via the testical via the use of a scalpol. Then putting the two sperms in a large hardon collider going at opersite directions and hope they combine... and then the rest is all pretty normal turkey baster stuff.

Anyway, I love this (press the CC button): www.youtube.com/watch?v=War-7M9Nv3A

* I've got to stop reffering to threesomes as orgies, it shows my lack of knowledge.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:32, Reply)

I like the song
it reminds me of this guy, www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iRTB-FTMdk&feature=relmfu who is my latest and greatest musical discovery.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:37, Reply)

Oh I like that a lot, I'm gonna get his stuff, that'll be my new music for this week.
Do you know Dan Le Sac v Scroobulus Pip's stuff? Angles is my alltime face album. I think you'd like this...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=uKrf81_5Bg8
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:44, Reply)

you can buy from
www.professorelemental.com
may I recommend The Indifference Engine well worth £5.

yeah, tune's not bad, not in love but it could grow on me.

Edited to add: you might also like: www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSflRlHPay4 although I prefer Elemental.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:48, Reply)

Sweet, I'll go for that now.
I've heard of the gentleman rhymer, one of his vids went viralish (I think it was chap-hop). London deffo has the best rap in the world, I think I'd really like paris-rap if I knew french.

Oh my, that reminds me, I was talking to some very pretty french girls after the pub last night, but had to inform them that Birmingham is not just around the corner.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:57, Reply)

Fine, the court accepts your plea
of "not guilty due to Gonzism", but I'm not changing it again so soon.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 3 Jul 2011, 18:12, Reply)