I took four pairs of jeans to the tailors last week.
I forgot to tell him I wanted them tapered a certain way, so I went back in the next day and told him really specifically. "Yeah I know, I'm not an idiot" he replied. Just picked them up, he's fucked every pair up royally. I think he thought I asked him to turn them all into denim shorts. I may cry.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:06, 4 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Take it out on CQ - he's a spastic, you see.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:08, Reply)

Mmnnnnnng!

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:11, Reply)

I think it's time to demand a refund or the job done right.
Possibly you should get the cost of the trousers back too, knowing you they'll have been expensive.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:10, Reply)

Knowing him , they'll have been sneaked out of a shop under a coat.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:11, Reply)

They weren't that expensive, I think the most I paid for one of them was fifty quid.
It's the fact I can't just go into a shop and buy them again cos they're all a couple years old.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:15, Reply)

Maybe not in your world
But to me at least £50 is a lot for a pair of jeans.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:16, Reply)

I neglect jeans.
Cos no one really notices them. In my opinion when they look good they just blend in, but when they're bad they stick out and make you look like a twat. I've just had a break through with a specialist alterations place in Manchester, I'm gonna send them off to there to get them sorted. God knows how much it's gonna cost.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:21, Reply)

Meh, I just stick to black 501s
I am far from your league.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:25, Reply)

My favourite ones he ruined were a pair of vintage 505s
:(
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:35, Reply)

*checks Jeans*
Nope, sorry, these are 550s, I knew this was my one pair that wasn't 501s and I'd have posted them to you if they'd been 505s, not that they'd fit you, and anyway probably not coz posting other men your trousers is weird, innit?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:37, Reply)

Not in the denim world.
I've seen some weird stuff. People don't wash their jeans for years (seriously) and then sell them on for more than they paid. It's nothing to do with being a bender (although I have my suspicions), it's because apparently the 'fading' of the denim is a sought after commodity. All very odd and not for me.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:41, Reply)

Fucking hell
Are you mighty badgers love child?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:11, Reply)

I don't think I've ever known another straight bloke
as into clothes as you.
( Kroney, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:12, Reply)

I think this says a lot.
Are you still coming to the hardnuts lunch then?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:13, Reply)

It does, My friends and I are all terrible scruffs.
Yes, I'll be there. 4 works out quite well for me as I'll be able to check into the hotel and have some Dutch courage before meeting a gang of internet weirdos in an area I don't know with lots of dark, forbidding alleyways. An area that's already quite famous for a number of murders.
( Kroney, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:15, Reply)

Bugger
I was hoping you were joking. Oh well, I guess I can put with an uncomfortable silence for the sake of the lamb chops and spicy poos.

What are you like in real life?

EDIT - dutch courage should be taken with care, I've met a number of b3tans who got utterly wankered and only some of them turned out to be alright when they weren't.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:17, Reply)

A bit quiet to start with, but once I've warmed up I'm pretty chatty.

( Kroney, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:18, Reply)

Fair enough
Are you old? Like, Monty old, or are you just middling old like me. Since you've been on here 9 years I'm guessing you're not that much of a young 'un.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:22, Reply)

Haha, nobody's Monty old.
My granny was younger than him at 78 and dead.

I'm 31.
( Kroney, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:23, Reply)

So a smidgeon older than me.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:24, Reply)

So many people on here are younger than I think.
I thought Vipros was my age, I thought Naked Ape was older.

This place is bad for my ego.
( Kroney, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:25, Reply)

I'm older than you if that helps.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:27, Reply)

but his age is the same number as your IQ
so you'll have that in common!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:25, Reply)

But strangely enough it's only half the size of your waistband.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:29, Reply)

a third actually
if you're going to be a creeeeeeeeeeeeepy fb stalker, at least be accurate about it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:32, Reply)

It's always been a surprise to me
that you never entered the Diplomatic Corps.
( Kroney, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:29, Reply)

it doesn't pay well enough

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:33, Reply)

And just think of all those forrin names you'd have to learn.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:35, Reply)

Be warned: Al and I are right hardnuts. On and offline.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:25, Reply)

We're fucking mental.
Once we looked at each funny and the entire restaurant died.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:29, Reply)

God I remember that.
50 dead in a matter of seconds.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:31, Reply)

Took ages to get the bill.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:31, Reply)

IIRC they waived it on account of how fucking tough we are.
They 'didn't want any trouble', I recall.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:36, Reply)

*insert Tayyabs fart joke here*

( Kroney, Mon 12 Sep 2011, 17:32, Reply)