Christ that thread is massive.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 17:46, 128 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

said the tailor

(PsychoChomp, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:03, Reply)

wheras this one, it appears, is miniscule :(

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:05, Reply)

So's your mum.
Evening.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:07, Reply)

An astute observation
What's the score on the job front, Dozer?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:21, Reply)

SFA at the moment.
My CV is out there, but no luck.

I'm seriously considering selling my meagre body for dollar.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:23, Reply)

Take it nothing came of the law firms then?
Obviously not.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:25, Reply)

One knock back, another that I'm waiting for a response from.
Did I tell you about law stuff?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:27, Reply)

You must have done because I know about it
Training contracts, yeah?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:29, Reply)

Yeah.
Fingers crossed and all that, but I feel so fucking glum at the moment about everything that even if I did get an interview I'd fuck it up with nerves and negativity.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:31, Reply)

What is it you do at the moment?
(Evening everyone by the way)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:36, Reply)

Pensions Administration.
DB schemes.

More tedious than SpankyHanky.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:38, Reply)

Can you take a short-term sideways move within Financial Services with someone else
Whilst you hunt out what it is you really want?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:41, Reply)

I am trying that.
I used to work in Financial Services marketing.

I am CIM qualified and everything.

Maybe I am too hip hop for the industry.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:43, Reply)

Maybe employers are concerned that you'll start scratching financial records.
You might want to change your name on your C.V from MC Audit as well.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:44, Reply)

My DJing name is Paradigm.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:45, Reply)

I don't know what this is
I'm just about old enough to remember Callaghan's Winter of Discontent but there's an awful lot of general fucked-offness out there, coupled with specific individual fucked-offness such as yours.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:38, Reply)

You don't know what what is?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:39, Reply)

He doesn't know.
That's what makes the whole thing so very, very sad.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:41, Reply)

Does he have alzheimers?
If so, Al wants them back. He can't remember where he left them.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:42, Reply)

There's a box of Heimers in my loft.

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:44, Reply)

Yes, I know very well what this is, and why, and that was a daft thing of me to say.
There's a general malaise about where we're going as a nation which is amplified by individual situations of lack of opportunity.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:42, Reply)

I made biscuits
And they were nice. Where are YOUR biscuits?
(Deadly Octopus no deaths since, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:49, Reply)

There is a lot of this biscuit making going about on B3ta.
I have shop bought biscuits.
( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:51, Reply)

Yo stop frontin' and use ya head
www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5lcpz90d_o
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:55, Reply)

Dat Shit to Make ya Head Knod till it Break Off.
Are you trying to seduce me with choooooooons?
( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:59, Reply)

If only I could, fair Blousie.
For verily, I wouldst.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:00, Reply)

Too late fayre Plum for I am off the boil.

( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:01, Reply)

I have some Nu Skool Breaks on now.
Koma & Bones remix of an Uptown Connection tune.

Vinyl FTW!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:22, Reply)

But mine are all different shapes and look like a drunk person made them
But delicious they are. Very delicious indeed.
(Deadly Octopus no deaths since, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:55, Reply)

In my biscuit cupboard

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:52, Reply)

A very reasonable place to have them
But what type are they? And on the subject of biscuits, what happened to Lincoln biscuits, the crumbly dimply ones? I miss them. I should try and make those next.
(Deadly Octopus no deaths since, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:59, Reply)

John Wilkes Booth shot them

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:00, Reply)

i have no biscuits

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:18, Reply)

I cooked dinner tonight for my family
soup for me naturally.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:57, Reply)

alright Amberl?
I am listening to some vintage DJ Shadow on vinyl

What Does Your Soul Look Like? Part 2.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 18:58, Reply)

Yer that mix I was going on about
www.discogs.com/James-Lavelle-MoWax-Crew-60-Mins-Of-MoWax-Shit/release/1540220

Totally worth a listen
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:15, Reply)

Blimey some right tunes on there. I have a few of those on vinyl, like the Andrea Parker tune.
Do you know where I can get a copy?

And it isn't mixed by Lavelle. Most probably The Psychonauts, like they did for 'his' Cream Live and Tribal Gathering compilations back in the 90s.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:17, Reply)

Originals are rare as hens teeth, I could only pick up a copy. I can send you a copy of a copy.
The excursions mix is a sweet number too www.discogs.com/Various-Excursions/release/8064
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:24, Reply)

I have Excursions on CD
And a few of the vinyl releases- strangely it was meant to be a techno spinoff, but they put out Hardcore Hip Hop by Shadow with a Chief Xcel tune on the flip as one of the releases.

I suppose they had to put a Shadow tune on the label to make sure it sold.

I actually have two copies of one of the releases, if you want it, give me a shout. It's DJ Solo feat JT- Pressure. There's a Peshay remix on the flip.

12" of course.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:27, Reply)

Cool blud
Anyway yeah if want that copy gaz or summit
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:32, Reply)

Gazzed bbz.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:35, Reply)

I've had sooop too.
Carrot and coriander.
( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:00, Reply)

Scotch broth here
and a carrot
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:35, Reply)

Evening chums!
and what a delightful day.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:01, Reply)

Not really.

( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:02, Reply)

i was just trying to be up tempo
it's a rainy, shit day. BUt I did buy some wine

why's your day not delightful?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:03, Reply)

Boring day but I had a good session at the gym and have wine too : )

( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:06, Reply)

yay!
I went to the gym, too. First time in a while. It was good. Knacked now, though
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:07, Reply)

We is sisters innit.

( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:09, Reply)

*something smutty about sisters and lesbians and threesomes and that*

(Bazongaloid, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:10, Reply)

totally blud

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:11, Reply)

lol
fortyshadesofgrey.blogspot.com/
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:14, Reply)

Blimey, she's in Bristol now, is she?
I can drive through Heaton again without worrying/fantasising about running her over.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:18, Reply)

I thought I'd pretty much cleansed my great city. And now I'll have to start all over again.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:21, Reply)

Look for a squalid squat
With AA panting outside the door.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:24, Reply)

There'll be various sightings of a fat kraken in Bristol over the coming weeks, you can give the locals the heads up

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:25, Reply)

"It's ok she's mostly harmless, just fat, stupid, and highly irritating"

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:27, Reply)

You've got to admire her hutzpah!

( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:23, Reply)

We've discussed her fanny enough thanks

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:26, Reply)

I gave blood today
The quality of the biscuits was very low, so I went to Waitrose afterwards and bought large chocolatey cookies.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:09, Reply)

Hehe!
I believe the NHS is not what it used to be Al.
( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:10, Reply)

They've got one more shot Blousie
one more chance at a different location in January, if it doesn't get any better I'm gonna start taking my own biscuits in with me.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:11, Reply)

I think they tempt the poorer classes into giving blood with their inferior biscuits but also this means the middle classes are in revolt.

( girlinthehole, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:14, Reply)

when I gave blood I didn't get a buscuit
I did get a trip in an ambulance, though
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:12, Reply)

Did you collapse and need to have it put back inside you?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:12, Reply)

was nearly unconscious and spasming for an hour or so
they did lots of heart monitoring and stuff I barfed on a paramedic.

Then they did a blood test. This seemed like a bad idea, but turns out it was fine
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:14, Reply)

also
fnar fnar
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:15, Reply)

I hjadn't intended that bit to be smutty, but it was

(Bazongaloid, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:16, Reply)

i've been making chili
It may be too tomatoey.
Never made it before. You're all welcome to pop by and have some.
lol jk ur totally not invited
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:34, Reply)

Let it simmer for a bit to reduce the toms, and if needs be. Add a bit more chili powder.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:36, Reply)

there's a fuck load of chili powder
It definitely needs to simmer for a while, I'm just worried other people won't like it
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:40, Reply)

Try it, and if it tastes like shit, go to Krusty Burger instead.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:41, Reply)

that's not an actual place, jeff

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:47, Reply)

It is. I've seen it on the telly.
The Simpsons eat there quite often. So nah!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:47, Reply)

i saw a flying horse on telly one time, where are they at?

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:49, Reply)

they are in teh sky, obvs

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:50, Reply)

:(
awww I luuuuuuurve chilli, though, I've not had any in ages
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:38, Reply)

pop by and have some

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:47, Reply)

Don't do it Captain. You'll get there and she'll be all 'haha! Fuck off'
And send you home without any dinner.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:48, Reply)

well should be OK, it's only round the corner, after all
I'll just pop in to mexico and get chilli there if she won't let me in
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:49, Reply)

As long as you've got a plan.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:51, Reply)

she could go there first and bring back ingrediants for margaritas

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:53, Reply)

will do

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:56, Reply)

no way cap'n i'd never do this

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:51, Reply)

Bet you would.
Either that, of you'd give Captain a bowl of chilli and Captain would say, 'It's quite nice, but maybe a bit too tomatoey for my taste' and you'd go mental and shoot her in the face because all Americans have guns.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 19:57, Reply)

i'd probably take it a step further and sling her from the nearest tree, since im a redneck and all

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:18, Reply)

Yeah. You could, like, TOTALLY set fire to a cross as well.
Klansaway!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:28, Reply)

Put a little bit of sugar in it.
It negates the acidity of the tomatoes.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:16, Reply)

ohh ta!

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:19, Reply)

Not too much mind!
Otherwise it just becomes unbearably sweet. Maybe a level teaspoon or two.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:23, Reply)

it smells like pasta sauce

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:26, Reply)

Needs more chilli then.
Whack a couple of extra fresh ones in.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:29, Reply)

i have none

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 20:31, Reply)