Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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How about now?Do you like biscuits NOW?
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 12:45, 116 replies, latest was 14 years ago)
I always like biscuitsWhy would someone not like biscuits before?
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 12:55, Reply)
Is it only me that likes biscuitsor is everybody ignoring you because you've done something bad?
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:02, Reply)
It's possibly baldmonkey or someone doing an impression of baldmonkey.(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:22, Reply)
Good to knowAnyway, it's just an easy question for my last half an hour here. I didn't really fancy talking about politics.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:23, Reply)
normally I wouldn't contribute to a thread like thisbut yeah, I like biscuits
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:10, Reply)
Crazy times, I've just had a digestive(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:11,
Reply)
So was it bobby who had the whole facebook flounce?He's a fat illiterate cunt anyway don't worry about it.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:18, Reply)
Why do people flounce?Don't they teach at schools that The Internet is not to be taken seriously?
Kids these days.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:22, Reply)
I think it's because they get all worked up and RAWR and tell everyone how they feel but then they're too embarrassed to come back because they acted like twats
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Lisette von Falcon, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:25,
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I feel that you should know that I laughed heartily when you ignored me. (
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:29,
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Thank you.They are much better.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:34,
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I did not know of this "internet" when I was at schoolIt seems a fairly light-hearted place to me.
How is being enormous?
My Mrs keeps telling me that she is enormous and I keep telling her that I can clearly see that she is and don't need to be told.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:49,
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This seems a bit heartlessyou could at least advise her to stay off the doughnuts
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:56,
Reply)
Yeah, cos she's squashing the shit out of them(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:57,
Reply)
She has a different type of bun in her ovenYou have probably guessed that, but I am too autistic to read between any lines that may be present in your posts.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:58,
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I had more sympathy when I thought you were married to a fattyFucking breeders.
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:00,
Reply)
Good lord! I wouldn't marry a fatty!Keep 'em barefoot and pregnant, is what I say...
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:12,
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You and Mark are too similarHe says that to mee too. In fact, sometimes he just looks at me, with eyes wide open, and shouts "Wow, you're massive!"
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:57, Reply)
Hob Nob pleaseI have had a haircut, for once it is good, the guy cutting didn't try and talk to me, I didn't hit defcon bongle when my hair was washed by a busty beauty and it didn't cost me £42 like some twat paid the other day.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:43,
Reply)
I think I'll have mine done on Saturdayor Friday if I have time. I need a bit of colouring too.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:45, Reply)
Would you like a 50% off colouring voucher for Rush?It RL though, not internets
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:47,
Reply)
No reallyI went to Rush once and ended up paying £80 only for colour and dry. Not my thing; and they didn't do the colour right. I go now to a hairdresser in Worthing where each thing is £9 (with free blow dry), so at most I pay £36, and they are pretty good.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:50, Reply)
Are you allowed to colour your hair?I thought it was rather frowned upon when up the duff.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:51,
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Too late for anything to go wrong now anyway, innit?(
CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:52,
Reply)
It's okthe ammount of colouring that you need is 100 times more than what they use. If you're worried you can ask for herbal colouring, but there's no evidence of colouring causing any problems to the baby.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:56, Reply)
Well, don't come crying to me when the baby comes out purple.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:58,
Reply)
They DO tend to come out a little purple...(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:59,
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also pointy headed and covered in shit.(
CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:02,
Reply)
They are normally just pointy poos CQ(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:02,
Reply)
That's no way to talk about a baby.(
CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:08,
Reply)
I'm a bit dissapointedIt's my last day in the office, my last 15 min, and there hasn't been a "farewell meeting" to wish me good luck and all that.
I know I've been here only for a few months, but c'mon! I've put money for every single birthday, retirement and farewell since I'm here. I was expecting at least a card.
Buuu.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:49, Reply)
Good luck Aber!I er... didn't get you a card.
I was thinking of the future of the environment for your unborn child.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:50,
Reply)
Thank you!It's ok. It's only the people in the office. If I had known I wouldn't have gone to bed late for 3 days baking cakes...
Ah, I made Mark read that thread yesterday about the childbirth. He thinks you're right and that he's going to be very strong and don't leave me alone as soon as all starts.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:52, Reply)
They're secretly narked that you're fucking off after a couple of months and that they'll have to cover your workload(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:51,
Reply)
Or they're jealous of her obvious fertility.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:52,
Reply)
Yeah, well, that's probably truebut still, I've worked for this company for more than 5 years, and 6 months on this office. Expecting a card and a "good luck" is not so strange, is it?
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:53, Reply)
Agreeing with you here, you get a nice lovely cake and card when you're promoted but shit when you leave(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:57,
Reply)
If that was the case!I've been in so many retirement parties and meetings since I'm here! And put so much money on presents!
Bah, I don't care. I'm off in 1 minute.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:59, Reply)
Or if it's a small business worried about the cost of a temporary replacement in addition to paying maternity leave.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:53,
Reply)
Nope, it's not small at all80,000 employees. And they give us the minimum, minimum maternity leave that is compulsory, no more.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:55, Reply)
CALL THE POLICE !!!!One year eh, you reacon they should chuck in another one for good measure
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:58,
Reply)
6 months, not a yearYou can take a year off but 6 months will be unpaid
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:59,
Reply)
All mine have taken the year(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:00,
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Yeah but minimum entitlement is 6 months at SMP(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:00,
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I'm not knocking itJust saying
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:02,
Reply)
I wishThey give us 80% of the salary for 6 weeks and that's it. Then, until you do 9 months it's £125/week, but I think that's the goverment. After that, they keep your job for another 3 months, but you don't get paid for it.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:00, Reply)
That's better than most.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:03,
Reply)
Haha if you're lucky they'll wait until the stat expiry of maternity leave and then tell you the obvious that they won't be returning(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:56,
Reply)
Everyone leaves at the end of their maternity leave.It's what everyone expects. And to be frank, those few that do return to their jobs are fucking useless and everyone wishes they hadn't.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:11,
Reply)
they've hidden the presents behind your unborn childso they'll all pop out just at the end of childbirth. The balloons were a particular challenge, I'll have you know.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:52,
Reply)
Hahaha!That would be so much fun... if it didn't happen to me, but someone else.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:53, Reply)
*stands up*I've known Aber for nigh on some time now and I can say she has been a pleasure to work with, even allowing an old fool to steal her work as his own, thus preventing his "early retirement", she will be sorely missed, but we are sure will be a fantastic mother and we wich her the best of luck.
*pandatron engage!*
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:52,
Reply)
STOP MAKING HER CRY YOU FUCKING CUNT.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:59,
Reply)
He's punched her right in the baby now(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:00,
Reply)
And now you will raid her desk for pens, pencils and post-it notesYou heartless CUNT!
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:58,
Reply)
They hate your fucking guts, the party's tomorrow after you've gone.Hope this helps.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:00,
Reply)
He does have a delightful way of helping you to put things into proportion, doesn't he?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:05,
Reply)
Seriously though, I have typed the word proportion, in one form or another, far too many times today.Or to put it another way: disproportionately.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:23,
Reply)
Nope, sorry.I'll eat them if they are there (with some exceptions such as 'Nice' biscuits which are repulsive) but do not care a fig for them. cf cake, pudding, fruit.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:58,
Reply)
Dark choc McVities digestive biscuits with a cup of tea?What the fuck is wrong with you man?!
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 13:59,
Reply)
I'd rather have savoury food and booze than any of that gay shit.You must be some kind of menstruating woman or something.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:01,
Reply)
I'm a bloody pain, thats for sure(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:01,
Reply)
Right, I'm leavingSee you around, although probably more on Facebook than here.
Good luck, everyone!
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:02, Reply)
Good luck you!Have fun pushing a human being out of your cervix!
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:03,
Reply)
Try not to shit on the midwife!(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:04,
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Try and rhyme Quixote, go on, I dare you.(
CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:23,
Reply)
He's rightIt has to be accurate too
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:31,
Reply)
There's too may ducks and badgers around here, I can't keep them all straight.(
CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:16,
Reply)
there's no need to, sweetie.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:24,
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OK fine, I hope you enjoy your cavernous vag.(
CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:32,
Reply)
Actually, it was another play on the "straight" partbut, I don't mind being mistaken for TGB either.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 14:33,
Reply)
Only arse biscuits.not strictually true.
I do like a home made garibaldi.
(, Wed 19 Oct 2011, 19:09, Reply)
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