Ok, I need £5 secret santa ideas, not including any kind of delivery, but prefably from a company where if they do chrage delivery, they'll do other stuff I want.
The rigged Secret Santa at work turned up trumps this year, it's for my smoking buddy. It's a girl (with long term boyfriend), She likes good food but rarely has many kind of what I'd call luxories. I don't mind spending a little bit over the limit for the prize as she's pretty safe. Prefably from www.firebox.com or www.play.com .
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:37, 77 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Get her a book from the bookman
Nothing says Happy Christmas like some bankrupt stock someone is hawking round the average office.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:47, Reply)

Alright Jeff?
What's a bookman?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:50, Reply)

I think the company is called 'the book people'
I'm on my phone so I can't post a link.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:54, Reply)

I've used them and got some good bargains.
Usually it's crap I don't want.

Good for kids books.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:57, Reply)

*Waves*
I've had a shit day. I'm gonna go for a pint.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:59, Reply)

I have wine.
Have fun : )
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:00, Reply)

I thought about buying some wine on the way home
but I didn't.

This remarkable story is available in my latest book: 1001 Fascinating Broadsword Anecdotes available NOW from all good retailers.
( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:05, Reply)

*puts on Amazon favorites*

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:08, Reply)

I'll google 'em =)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:57, Reply)

edible undies, duhhhh

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:51, Reply)

I wonder if anyone has ever used them before in a sexy way.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:58, Reply)

only insofar as consumer testing that question. I expect there's a Which? survey about it.
in anger I very much doubt it.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:00, Reply)

Allow me...
http://www.thepresentfinder.co.uk/categories/under-5
Now if you'll excuse me, I have laundry to attend to.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:52, Reply)

thing is, most of that appears to be pure junk.

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:56, Reply)

I'll be honest you here b3th, you maybe very pretty, but that link is rubbish.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:02, Reply)

You've never been to the indoor market
At Weston Super Mare have you?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:05, Reply)

Fair enough.
Just so you know, the chances of me sitting on your willy have just reduced.
Try ebay. You can get some good stuff there fairly cheap. I myself am currently selling some rather nice xmas gifts for exactly a fiver, with free postage.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:07, Reply)

I didn't realise it went into minus numbers =(
0o000o0o0og, what stuff?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:13, Reply)

Can't link from my phone

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:14, Reply)

www.theliterarygiftcompany.com/secret-santa-190-c.asp
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 18:57, Reply)

naahhhhh

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:03, Reply)

she's more of a dumb slapper then?

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:12, Reply)

MAGNETS BULBS AND BATTERIES!
Christ, I spent literally minutes leafing through that book as a youngster.
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:05, Reply)

I like the look of the Edward Lear Bookplates
and think I own the illustrated cat cards/envelopes
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 20:07, Reply)

www.amazon.co.uk/Adult-Candy-G-String/dp/B0017HSSTA/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1322679592&sr=8-1
( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:00, Reply)

You know what mamma likes.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:01, Reply)

HAPPY MOTHER FLIPPIN CANDLE!

( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:02, Reply)

FANKOOOOO!

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:02, Reply)

Do people really want chomping teeth around that area?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:05, Reply)

I wouldn't mind chomping my teeth round YOUR area, know what I mean?

( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:06, Reply)

Fuck all that, get her some cheap crap from John Lewis.
www.johnlewis.com/Search/Search.aspx?SearchTerm=Gift+Ideas+For+Her+Under+20#&&/wEXAgURU2VhcmNoRXZlbnRUYXJnZXQFH1NlYXJjaFJlc3VsdHNHcmlkMV9VcGRhdGVQYW5lbDEFE1NlYXJjaEV2ZW50QXJndW1lbnQFZVNSVC9TZWFyY2gvU2VhcmNoLmFzcHg/U2VhcmNoVGVybT1HaWZ0IElkZWFzIEZvciBIZXIgVW5kZXIgMjAmT00tUGFnZU51bWJlcj0xJk9NLVNvcnRPcmRlcj0xJkNhblJlcz0xAcQhrXQg+bruAkBzlgk6mim1d8Y=

I'll have a starry rubber duck please:
www.johnlewis.com/231300162/Product.aspx
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:04, Reply)

Starry starry duck. Paint your palette blue and grey. Look out on a winters day.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:07, Reply)

HUMMMM, *think*

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:13, Reply)

Just get her a box of her regular tabs
She'll appreciate it far more than any of the other crap for a fiver, and shows that you've been paying attention around her, something which long term boyfriends never do. She'll start seeing you in a different light mark my words, possible fling potential.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:09, Reply)

Very clever Rory.
I can see you have expertize in this area.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:10, Reply)

Gonz needs to be addin another squirt of that zeisty aftershave that she says she loves, and giving her meaningful glances whilst smoking, but also to look thoughtfully into the distance at the same time
chicks really dig that
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:14, Reply)

*sighs*

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:15, Reply)

BITCHES BE KERRAZY

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:16, Reply)

alright bbz?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:23, Reply)

Me or Rory?

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:28, Reply)

Both of you.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:34, Reply)

Huzzah!

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:37, Reply)

0o0o0oh, sounds arlight.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:15, Reply)

I got my phone gonz
Only just gone through the setup process, but I've got to say that I'm pretty impressed. And I'm a lifelong Apple cynic.
( Kroney, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:13, Reply)

They're very very good at what they do, check out this, it'll help....
lifehacker.com/5607809/lifehacker-pack-for-iphone-our-list-of-the-best-iphone-apps
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:14, Reply)

Cheers!
I shall have a browse once I work out how to transfer my mp3s.
( Kroney, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:28, Reply)

they got you, huh?
hope you recover soon.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:21, Reply)

Everybody hates the popular kids
I've already run into the famously locked down aspect of it, just trying to import stuff using a PC with no iTunes. But the interface is really slick. It depends on what you use it for, I guess. I really just want a nicely put together phone. I don't want to be fucking about with it too much.
( Kroney, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:27, Reply)

the "just works" factor
clearly is worth a lot. Android does not generally "Just work"
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:38, Reply)

as an aside...
I had 4 hours sleep last night and feel fucking miserable. I'm supposed to go for my weekly swim tonight. Should I

1) Go, and stop whining, I'll feel better for it.
2) Tell swimming to blow itself.

ta.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:21, Reply)

Fuck it and go home.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:26, Reply)

I'm already home, which makes it even harder...

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:52, Reply)

Swim, then you'll sleep like a log tonight.
This message was brought to you by Saying the Opposite of BGB.
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:35, Reply)

I was supposed to go to the gym tonight and didn't bother.
I did hoover the house though.
( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:36, Reply)

didn't?
plenty of time left. go!
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:37, Reply)

No you didn't.

(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:38, Reply)

i reckon he vacuumed it.

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:42, Reply)

Despite all hints to the contrary, I can assure you that BGB is a lady.

(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:43, Reply)

I use the term "lady" in the loosest possible sense.

(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:43, Reply)

Kinda like her...
*knows when to stop*
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:43, Reply)

*waggles eyebrows*

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:47, Reply)

there are NO women on b3ta.
woman != lady
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:51, Reply)

Yes I did.

( girlinthehole, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:46, Reply)

sounds like a good plan for life.
additional forces have told me to go, so I'll give it a whirl.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:37, Reply)

Try shotdeadinthehead.com

Some of the mouse mats are funny.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 19:52, Reply)

some all funny complete shit
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 21:38, Reply)

Best chocs you'll get for a decent price.
www.hotelchocolat.co.uk/
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 20:07, Reply)

Buy her a turkey baster.
Then depending on her reaction you can judge if: A] she wants kids by someone other than her bf and B] if she'd like you to supply the relevant goods.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 21:37, Reply)

How did your meetings go today?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 21:54, Reply)

Mixed.
Thanks for asking.

First two 6/10. Final one 9/10 - partly as I am more suited to that position and partly as I had rehearsed for it by having two interviews prior to it.

Shattered* now though. Forgotten how tiring it all is.

*Shattered Battered. Ha fucking ha.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 22:16, Reply)

Have a beer and get an early night.
I'd have texted you, but my battery has gone.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 22:19, Reply)

Evenin' Peeps.
how are we all?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 21:58, Reply)

Arr.
Good cheers. You coming out for a pint next Friday?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 22:00, Reply)

Should be, Mable's or somewhere new?

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 22:03, Reply)

Have a gander at the calendar.
The original suggesting was the Blind Beggar.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 22:04, Reply)

Will do. if it's Lahdin I can be there after work.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 30 Nov 2011, 22:08, Reply)

Hey Gonz.
I got one of the teachers at work, she loves to bake and makes lots of cakes and brings them in. I bought one of those GIANT cupcake moulds. £8.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Wed 30 Nov 2011, 23:58, Reply)