I'd like to be the first of us here on B3ta to congratulate Monty on winning the Turner Prize.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:21, 71 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Oreilly?

( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:24, Reply)

*WAVES*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:24, Reply)

*tsunamis*

( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:25, Reply)

*Rides ripples*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:32, Reply)

r n
( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:36, Reply)

Rid(d)en Ripples!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:38, Reply)

*googles*
Hahahaha!
( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:25, Reply)

My mate's at the Baltic.
Apparently a streaker in a tutu ran on stage to try and steal the prize. God bless Gateshead.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:28, Reply)

Are you sure it wasn't one of the artists?

( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:28, Reply)

I'm surprise the Nigerian Whites didn't win it this year with their installation.
'Coq's move van'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:32, Reply)

heh

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:30, Reply)

I got cut up on the motorway this afternoon
by a white van with 'MJ Boyce Decorators' on the back.
I waved my fist in anger.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:36, Reply)

You should have totally flashed your boobies.

( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:37, Reply)

I've been doing that all weekend

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:38, Reply)

Yay!

( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:38, Reply)

From the BBC:
*Crime down in Liverpool - Busty lass takes credit.*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:39, Reply)

credit tyres.

Also, there was a double murder in the Liverpool area this weekend.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:42, Reply)

One for each tit.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:44, Reply)

I say!

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:45, Reply)

Sorry. I'll rephrase that.
One for you. One for Roota.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:46, Reply)

Oh no you didn't!

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:47, Reply)

Oh yes I did!
Are you going to see The Hoff in panto this year, or is Bernie Clifton doing WsM?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:48, Reply)

I don't do panto
It's 'fucking bent'
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:52, Reply)

Oh yes it is!
Hopes to catch b3th out
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:53, Reply)

Are you going?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:56, Reply)

Of course I'm not.
Why would I?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:02, Reply)

I understand the drive of the van called you 'fucking bent'

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:37, Reply)

Oh man, did that feel good? I've not give a good anger fist shake in years....
... I've done the wanker thing for cars that don't let me cross the road and are driving soooo slowly that the lights will change by the time they go past me. God, I hate that so much. The other day someone did that, and then did a u-turn to get me on the way back too. Double slow-drive-pass. I did a "AND WHAT? BITCH" thing, you know, a bit like a shrug while mouthing the words "What the hell".

But for an actual anger-fist-shake, which is way worst than a wanker-fisk-shake, I think I need another testostorne injection first.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 6 Dec 2011, 8:40, Reply)

Hahahahaha YES!
Now watch us concede twice in injury time.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:45, Reply)

Taken the lead have ya?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:46, Reply)

84th minute goal.
Could be about 4-4, they've hit the post twice, we've hit it once and missed a hatful of chances. We better win, I despise these self pitying arseholes.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:47, Reply)

Who scored for you?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:48, Reply)

Dempsey scored a tap in after Reina fumbled it.
He hit the crossbar about two minutes earlier, had a great game. I still hate him (and every other Fulham player, and in fact every footballer/person everywhere).
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:52, Reply)

Shame you didn't get my lot in the FA Cup.
I could have pointed the City Youth in your direction! :)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 21:54, Reply)

I'm too old for that nonsense now I'll have you know.
Great win tonight, never in doubt. Read all about it in The Sun tomorrow.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:05, Reply)

I don't take the Sun.
I'll read all about it online.

You still in 'the North' Baz?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:11, Reply)

It was a joke you 'nana.
Scousers? The Sun? Geddit?
And aye sir, back home in two weeks for Christmas.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:14, Reply)

Looking forward to getting back to 'the south' I take it!
I got ya joke.

Taking in any games over the festive period?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:17, Reply)

I was disheartened by the lack of 'HAHAHAHAHAHA'.
Me, my dad and brother are doing Chelsea away on Boxing Day. I wouldn't take the flag normally but two of my (arsehole Chelsea supporting) flatmates are in the home end so it'd be wrong of me not to flaunt it. £174 for three tickets!!!
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:22, Reply)

Fucking hell.
You can get a season ticket at The Gate for that.

(Well, ticket in a shit part of the ground)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:27, Reply)

I don't know why we're bothering.
We'll turn up from the pub twenty minutes late and leave as soon as we go two nil down. Actually I do know why we're bothing - my old man's paying for it.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:47, Reply)

I can't imagine
Wolf would be that flamboyant.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:54, Reply)

who'd have thunk it
evening chumps. I have done a christmas thing. Now can we be done with this christmas lark?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:00, Reply)

No.
suck it up, Scrooge.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:00, Reply)

fine!
then I shall make myself christmassy hot chocolate while wearing a woolly hat
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:04, Reply)

What have you done Captain?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:02, Reply)

been in a christmas concert
not as a twinkly christmas star, though
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:03, Reply)

Did you get the part of Mary
Or were you a wise (wo)man?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:04, Reply)

I was a sheep
and they always get lucky round here
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:05, Reply)

#sings...
Whilst shepards wash their socks by night
All standing by a truck
The Captain of the Cave came down
And gave them all a fuck.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:09, Reply)

Did you wear a tea towel on your head?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:05, Reply)

yeah, but only when I played the part
of 'kitchen utensil no. 3'
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:09, Reply)

With that sort of attitude.
You'll always be a spatula.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:10, Reply)

Fork off

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:13, Reply)

Tsk.
I'd take that as a condiment. But I won't.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:19, Reply)

you're conversation is always peppered with puns

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:19, Reply)

Have you got any winter pepper?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:23, Reply)

I won't
FALL for that one
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:24, Reply)

No winter pepper?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:25, Reply)

in summery, no

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:26, Reply)

*Ponders*
I wonder if Cavy has any somersault....
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:26, Reply)

i knew it 2was there somewhere

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:27, Reply)

*BEAMS*
I feel a bit bad Captain. I was going to book a coach to head to London this weekend. I decided to spend the extra on the train instead.

What a waste of cash.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:30, Reply)

worth it
the last coach to a b4ash tookk forever and there was no escaping the horrible girls singing and squealing in the back
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:32, Reply)

I hope so.
Night!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 22:37, Reply)

i googled turner prize winner, is he this one?
hoffstrizz.typepad.com/.a/6a0128773aba66970c01348515bb35970c-pi
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 23:16, Reply)

No.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 6 Dec 2011, 0:08, Reply)

The double murder was NOT in the Liverpool area.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 5 Dec 2011, 23:20, Reply)

Southport, wasn't it?
I've played cricket just round the corner from the house.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 6 Dec 2011, 7:34, Reply)

house pavillion.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 6 Dec 2011, 8:03, Reply)

Yup, Southport.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 6 Dec 2011, 8:58, Reply)