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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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quentin, "boring people are bored" as my friend would say
so. what is the most ridiculous/clever headline or story you've ever seen in the papers?
alt: post something in the style of another poster and we'll all guess who it is? a game that NEVER gets old.
alt alt: have you ever dressed up as a member of the opposite sex? would you?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:28,
118 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
When Celtic lost to Inverness Caledonian Thistle....
![](http://www.mcgarvey.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/caledonian.jpg)
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:32,
Reply)
that can't be real
it's up there with "wham bam sam cam's a mam (she'll need a new pram)"
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:34,
Reply)
No, it is real
The headline write had to retire after that one, surely? You can't top it
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:35,
Reply)
Unliley seeing as he ripped it off from a Liverpool Echo headline that read
SUPER CALLY GOES BALLISTIC, QPR ATROCIOUS
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Peej, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:44,
Reply)
I'm late to this
but it's definitely real.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:13,
Reply)
Killer Nazi Flies Invade Europe
Was a Sunday Sport headline years ago.
"it's Paddy Pantsdown" is my personal favourite.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:34,
Reply)
WWII DOUBLE DECKER BUS FOUND ON MOON VANISHES
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:35,
Reply)
i liked that on "spitting image"
esp when he came on and said "this campaign was fought on the slogan MY VOTE!
and sadly, that's all i got"
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:50,
Reply)
That needs to win awards.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:53,
Reply)
my friend says 'only boring people get bored' and she has a point, but i was referring to that tedious arguement taht was going on all morning
alt: I AM FAT AND CRAZY WHY WILL NOBODY LOVE ME???
alt alt yes, yes
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:32,
Reply)
alt: stop stalking your gf at lunchtime and give her some space and maybe she will stop dumping you?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:36,
Reply)
i didn't see her today, shes got a flood in her backyard
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:38,
Reply)
Ah, that time of the month
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Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:40,
Reply)
What Jeff said
Alt: This thread is fucking shit.
Alt Alt: Nope, never.
(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:36,
Reply)
Super Caley Go Ballistic Celtic Are Atrocious
After Inverness Caledonian Thistle battered Celtic at football.
Alt: No. Such games are for bennys and proles.
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Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:37,
Reply)
MARTIN CAN YOU PAY ATTENTION AT THE BACK PLEASE
(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:41,
Reply)
I haven't
alt: *pun*
altalt: yes, no.
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Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:37,
Reply)
I should be working but I've got my hands down my knickers
(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:38,
Reply)
darth foxtrot
that one was easy
(
Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:40,
Reply)
I need that family fortune sound that says neit
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:43,
Reply)
eee-arr
www.televisiontunes.com/Family_Fortunes_-_Wrong_Buzzer.html
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:49,
Reply)
Cheers Quint
(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:55,
Reply)
*Takes out knife* *Drinks coffee*
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:38,
Reply)
I had no idea my boyfriend was a smack head, but then he had no idea I was shagging my brother
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:39,
Reply)
forty shades of what now?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:43,
Reply)
nah that bird who looks like a bloke, bella just looks like a mess, a fat bloody mess
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:44,
Reply)
ah do you mean beky letters?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:48,
Reply)
Yer, it's one rule for one and a different for another from the clique man
How come she never got hounded mercilessly for loving the 'wrong person', fuckin rules of society man
(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:55,
Reply)
beckyletters did her brother?
why do i never hear the good gossip?
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Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:06,
Reply)
It's ok to bang on for years about Roberts minor indiscretion, but Becks fucked her brother and nobody bats an eyelid
This place is weird
(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:13,
Reply)
I'd never heard about it before
maybe she didn't explode online and tell the entire internet?
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Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:18,
Reply)
I think we need some kind of breakdown database where this info can be searched
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:20,
Reply)
There's sickening evidence that can be added to the database
www.b3tards.com/u/e908521f1c6e8c370697/jizzbox.jpg
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:11,
Reply)
I like this.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:21,
Reply)
right, see, youll never guess waht
tricky fuked sasha ovre the desk right and then johnny right he craked one out ovr it and i gave him one LOL LOLLOL your fat
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:44,
Reply)
i don't know any johnny?
tricky never fucked sasha, although he tried
i was gonna say something about louise earlier, i forgot what it was though
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:47,
Reply)
I remember reading a headline in a Irish newspaper
After some bloke got attacked with a golf club at a garage.
'Petrol Pump Punter in Pitch and Putt Pummelling'
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:48,
Reply)
sounds better with an irish accent
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:49,
Reply)
Julio Babtista leaves Arsenal because its to cold here here
Weather forces Baps out
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Peej, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:49,
Reply)
good afternoon quenders
one has just hiphopped in from one's paul smith shoot reeking of givenchy and oozing suaveness.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:50,
Reply)
monty
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:50,
Reply)
don't be silly
there was nothing about nignogs
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:52,
Reply)
it was monty
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:53,
Reply)
Alright PD
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:01,
Reply)
The guy who broke his foot kicking a terrorest in the nuts while on fire.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 15:52,
Reply)
Always been my favourite
![](http://www.terrierman.com/ramsay-sex-dwarf.jpg)
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Apothecaries' weight - I'm a cyborg, but that's OK, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:00,
Reply)
That'll teach it for luring disco dollies to a life of vice
(
Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:09,
Reply)
OH god yes, I remember this, DING DING, winnner
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:13,
Reply)
OH god yes, I remember this, DING DING, winnner
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:13,
Reply)
OH god yes, I remember this DING DING, winner
(
scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:17,
Reply)
^^hehe stupid hat.
obsidian nipples ARNO.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:20,
Reply)
you greedy fucker
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:34,
Reply)
OK, now you've confused me.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:35,
Reply)
YOU ATE GORDON RAMSEYS SEX MIDGET
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:38,
Reply)
It's a wicked headline
just a shame the story turned out to be bollocks.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:18,
Reply)
alt no fatties, etc
Alt alt yes of course, I used to be a lesbian, a hasbian roffle
(
Lisette von Falcon, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:06,
Reply)
I dunno, I don't read tabs very often and the other rags don't really like comedy headlines
Alt alt: fuck yes. Back in my "9 stone" phase I could do a pretty passable pre-Beckham posh spice.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:17,
Reply)
Darth?
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:18,
Reply)
haha, but no. that was an alt alt not an alt.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:19,
Reply)
I've heard a single alt is best
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:22,
Reply)
Oh, I dunno, there are few very underrated blends out there.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:27,
Reply)
PROOF!!
If proof were needed
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:29,
Reply)
Of what?
That I know a lot of shit? that's hardly news.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:32,
Reply)
I know more shit than you.
Most of it biblically.
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Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:37,
Reply)
Fair play.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:39,
Reply)
You are all incorrect about everything, I should know I work at a university or some shit
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:23,
Reply)
Oh come on, that could be at least three of us.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:26,
Reply)
or just you three times?!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:27,
Reply)
That would be Roota.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:27,
Reply)
Al doesn't work for a uni
He works in a portacabin plannIng holes
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:27,
Reply)
In fairness I've never claimed to be right "because I work for a University"
I'm right because I fucking am. Except, apparently, when I'm not.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:31,
Reply)
k2k6
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:27,
Reply)
What happened to him?
Did he fuck his brother too?
(
Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:31,
Reply)
Not that I'm aware of
He did seem overly sweaty handed on several occasions, but within normal off-topic parameters
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:33,
Reply)
Normal distribution of sweaty-handedness
nice.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:33,
Reply)
I work at a Uni and I am always right
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Peej, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:31,
Reply)
unless it has to do with scale or perspective
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:37,
Reply)
'Worksop Man Dies of Natural Causes'
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:30,
Reply)
'Hop Off You Frogs'
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:30,
Reply)
I just accidentally tripped up a small child running down the train carriage
He is now crying
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:31,
Reply)
"accidentally"
I bet you're sniggering as you're typing, you cunt.
(
Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:31,
Reply)
superfly? monty?
no, defineitely battered? yes?
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:32,
Reply)
Not Battered
He'd have "accidentally" glassed the kid.
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Kroney, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:32,
Reply)
Well done!
Kids shouldn't run round on trains
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:32,
Reply)
Explain that it's a good life lesson for him.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:33,
Reply)
Good work.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:57,
Reply)
Blind woman gets new kidney from dad she hasn't seen in years
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Peej, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:33,
Reply)
yeah, but where did he want his blinds?
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:35,
Reply)
No, she went of her own Accord.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:37,
Reply)
AHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAAHA!
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:39,
Reply)
AH NOAH!!!
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:42,
Reply)
This thread is more than a tad lacklustre.
Come on, flids. Look lively.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:36,
Reply)
*goes home*
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CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:47,
Reply)
Alt: Rah Rah Rah. Daddy bought me my flat and I only attract homosexual men darling.
Obvious post is obvious.
What else is going on pissfaces? I am home from work early and spending time with my daughter. Later I will go to the pub.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:46,
Reply)
punch her fucking face in battered, she was looking at your pint
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:47,
Reply)
That's child abuse.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:49,
Reply)
child abuse fun for the whole family.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:54,
Reply)
I can't believe you're saying this!!!1
Just because some people are in social housing in the Stoke area doesn't mean you can just hit them!!!!
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:52,
Reply)
hitting them would be preferable to living in stoke
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:58,
Reply)
motorhead is what teh thing at the top of a guitar is called
and anthrax is a poisonous thing
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Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:57,
Reply)
'motorhead is what teh thing at the top of a guitar is called'
No, it isn't.
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Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:18,
Reply)
^^wrong, again^^
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:20,
Reply)
It's a peghead or a machine head
As the tuning bits are known as tuning pegs or tuning machines. The name motorhead comes from a Hawkwind song referencing the American slang for someone on speed.
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Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 18:15,
Reply)
Primal Scream did a great cover of Motorhead.
Even Monty approves of it.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 18:22,
Reply)
alt alt
I've dressed up as other species*, does that count?
*not like a furry or anything
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:55,
Reply)
Alright?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:55,
Reply)
evening
you're not dead then?
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:57,
Reply)
One lives in hope.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:03,
Reply)
I thought he lived in London
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:04,
Reply)
hope Stoke.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:04,
Reply)
LOL
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:04,
Reply)
Am I bollocks
Fucking NAILS, me.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:05,
Reply)
careful
make sure you've got your tetanus injection up to date
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:06,
Reply)
Tetanus needs a Monty injection, not the other way round.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 17:06,
Reply)
oh yeah
Swansea Herald of Wales, back in 1995 had an article on the front page about someone finding a potato that looked like a fish "it was 6 inches long...it looked exactly like a turbot"
it was all we talked about in uni that year
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:57,
Reply)
IT'S THE SUN WOT WON IT
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 18:19,
Reply)
I'd forgotten about this one
www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/7902348/Transvestite-had-sex-with-a-dog-at-English-Heritage-castle.htmlalt alt: yes, once. A horrific experience for all involved - I have good legs for a skirt though..
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Apothecaries' weight - I'm a cyborg, but that's OK, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 18:45,
Reply)
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