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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Oh for fucks sake, you can't all be doing work surely?
alt: Buck your ideas up!
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:34,
86 replies,
latest was 13 years ago)
Just completed my weekly meeting with my direct reports. Forget dedication being what you need, delegation is where it's really at.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:35,
Reply)
Is it strange passing orders down when you're always looking up?
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:37,
Reply)
I only employ people shorter than me*
*this may not be true.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:39,
Reply)
true possible for much longer
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:41,
Reply)
Why? Am I supposed to be shrinking or something?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:42,
Reply)
You're running out of midgets to employ.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:46,
Reply)
It's damn difficult to find enough of them during panto season.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:49,
Reply)
Oh no it isn't!
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:04,
Reply)
LTI.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:04,
Reply)
Do they all sing "we're off to see the battered, the wonderful battered of Oz"
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:42,
Reply)
They refer to me as The True Messiah.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:43,
Reply)
Their union is called the 'Lollipop Guild'
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:47,
Reply)
I thought it was the Mickey Mouse Club?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:53,
Reply)
Who's the leader of the gang that's made for you and me?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:55,
Reply)
Gary Glitter?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:57,
Reply)
Is that cockney rhyming slang?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:59,
Reply)
B.A.T.T.E.R.E.D.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:57,
Reply)
L.I.L. B.A.T.T.E.R.E.D.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:05,
Reply)
F.U.C.K.O.F.F.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:07,
Reply)
Lil Battered fits the music too.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:08,
Reply)
B.A.T.T.E.R.E.D
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:13,
Reply)
I'm building an Apple Deployment server
sorry
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Peej, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:39,
Reply)
building an Apple Deployment server extremely dull and probably gay.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:42,
Reply)
I wish I was gay
I'd go out and fuck a bloke.
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Peej, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:03,
Reply)
you're building a tree waiter?
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:42,
Reply)
OH BOY THE APPLE STORE IS DOWN ! NEW PRODUCTS OH BOY OH BOY
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:52,
Reply)
Sorry Bob, remiss of me.
I actually was working. For about five minutes, then I decided it was a shit idea.
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Kroney, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:44,
Reply)

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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:49,
Reply)
Oven cleaning is without doubt the worst job in the home.
I feel really sorry for the guys that had to clean out that fucking lot.
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Kroney, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:54,
Reply)
Polish cleaner joke lolz
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:55,
Reply)
I've been off for a week, so have had some catching up to do.
I've caught up now so I'm knocking off in ten minutes.
Alt: I never did when the teachers at school demanded it, I don't see why I should start now.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:48,
Reply)
I am marking time until 4pm
when I can go and watch the footie and have free beers.
Alt: I have got a lot done today. No one was more surprised than me.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:54,
Reply)
me. the three young boy scouts that I 'did'.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:56,
Reply)
Get me in.
I love football.
When I say football, I mean 'free beers'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:01,
Reply)
Are you wearing a suit with your hair trimmed to short back and sides?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:09,
Reply)
In a sense.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:10,
Reply)
Specifically what sense?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:12,
Reply)
A ‘completely made up, untrue’ sense.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:14,
Reply)
In a sense that is nothing like wearing a suit or having short hair and more closely resembles Worzel Gummidge.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:14,
Reply)
I found out last night taht the granddaughters had no idea who Worzel Gummidge was.
I did a sadface.
I hope you are bringing up your daughter to know the great literary classics of our time. Well, her parents' time, anyway.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:16,
Reply)
I certainly will be. I will also teach her that science fiction and football are both fucking shit.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:18,
Reply)
and that the moon landings didn't happen, what a lucky girl to have a wonderful, open minded daddy
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:20,
Reply)
I will allow her to make her own mind up about things like that.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:22,
Reply)
good man
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:25,
Reply)
why are we whispering?
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:26,
Reply)
It's my new thing when replying to battered I write in tiny writing as he is tiny. I'mbeing considerate and helpful.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:27,
Reply)
Captain Pugwash, The Flumps and Bagpuss too, I trust?
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:23,
Reply)
The author and illustrator of Captain Pugwash was mates with my mum and my brother and I still have signed copies of the books with a really nice message written in all of them. I must find out where they are actually.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:26,
Reply)
+ sell them for drug money
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:27,
Reply)
Drugs are bad mmmmmkay.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:28,
Reply)
My kid's getting all 32 episodes of Capt Pugwash for her birthday.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:54,
Reply)
That's good parenting, right there.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:57,
Reply)
That is fantastic. 10 dad points.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:00,
Reply)
His wife might have something to say about him teaching her about his ex girlfriends.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:26,
Reply)
hahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahaahahahaahahahhaa
*breathes*
ahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
*prolapses*
ha.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:12,
Reply)
Yup.
Typical Monday here, very busy. Or at least, it was. I was at a wedding do last night, and I'm still drunk. What fun!
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The Luggage is haunted..., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 14:58,
Reply)
Did you get so pissed you can't remember what you did aka 'getting Pratchetted'?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:02,
Reply)
Pretty much, yes.
I recall one woman trying to put pink lip gloss on me, and something to do with an inflatable guitar and My Chemical Romance's "Black Parade".
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The Luggage is haunted..., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:03,
Reply)
Oh dear.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:06,
Reply)
I've seen some of the photos.
Surprisingly enough, I looked quite sober.
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The Luggage is haunted..., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:27,
Reply)
ober traight
/boredasfucklols
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:59,
Reply)
Is Australia really that bad?
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The Luggage is haunted..., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:02,
Reply)
Yes
Anything else?
Here's one for you: who was cast as Marty McFly in Back to the Future before Michael J Fox?
If you google it I'll take it as read that you spunked in your grandma's eye. (
I'm assuming this anyway)
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:09,
Reply)
Tom Selleck
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Kroney, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:14,
Reply)
Eric stoltz
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:21,
Reply)
Didn't even need to google it.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:26,
Reply)
You're some kind of wonderful guy Davvers
No mistakin'
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:28,
Reply)
I know everything 'bout nothing, me.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:30,
Reply)
Christopher Lee?
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Kroney, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:30,
Reply)
i'm off from one job today but i gotta go help at the family business
If you get my meaning
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Lisette von Falcon, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:05,
Reply)
Not really? Hi KSwiss.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:06,
Reply)
When you say family business do you mean doing head jobs for crack?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:07,
Reply)
runnin hooch cross state lines
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Lisette von Falcon, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 16:07,
Reply)
I was doing computer club this morning
and then our internet fell over so I had to play a computer game for a coupe of hours.
Now I'm back. Hope this helps.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:14,
Reply)
More helpful than your racism on my facebook yeah!
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:15,
Reply)
"Yeah, I'm Irish, begorrah"
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:16,
Reply)
Alright, you got me, I'm from Zimbabwe.
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ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:18,
Reply)
Grobelols
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:22,
Reply)
A coupe of hours.
Very posh. How many hours is that? Coopay of hours.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:19,
Reply)
Miss! Miss!
Stunned is making fun of my gonzism, Miss! send him to the exclusion room!
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:21,
Reply)
Expressing sexual perversions online or merely spelling words incorrectly?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:23,
Reply)
a little of column A...
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:24,
Reply)
I was working
Or at least pretending to work (from home) whilst wanking over fantasy celebrity catfight stories and chubby porn vids. I'd almost done a 'double-up' when I realised I had to pick the kids up from primary school. In my disappointment I left 10 minutes early so I could pick up a 2 litre bottle of Frosty Jack from the local Mace. I downed it in the school carpark and left the empty at the back of the car after pretending to look for something in the boot. I spilt a bit on the passenger seat whilst I was chugging it down so I had to rub a half-sucked Strepsil over the wet patch so the car didn't stink of alcohol when the missus got into it and she'd know I'd been up to my old tricks again. I got back alright and chewed a pack of chuddy and another streppy to hide the smell of cider. I'm back in bed now with the laptop, logged into Logmein and sent a few emails, just enough time to stroke one off before the England match.
Alt: OK
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:48,
Reply)
I must say
I enjoyed your book immensely.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:53,
Reply)
Not my book gramps
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 11 Jun 2012, 15:53,
Reply)
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