Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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SMEG!I declare the sausage-fest OVER!
Do you take steps to protect the real you online? Some of you lot are wide open and there are types in this world that would exploit that.
Alt: Are you any good at flirting? Do you do it without knowing and act all shocked and shit when your missus gives you that look at the supermarket checkout?
Altalt: I dunno, you folks seem to like food so what is the best use of chicken?
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:42,
99 replies,
latest was 13 years ago)
dunno dave, good question!(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:43,
Reply)
Christ, fuckers like you are so tedious'I declare the sausage-fest OVER!'? spend the rest of your days fucking the fuck off and you might get close to how much you should fuck off. twat
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:45, Reply)
comedy accounts are well LOL!(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:47,
Reply)
INCONCEIVABLE!Ooh, you cheeky fucker, I feel like I've finally made it.
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:47,
Reply)
This post represents the nadir of worldwide society to dateMcIntyre will be relieved
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:47, Reply)
Seriously, that post was a "totes amazeballs" away from being the b3ta equivalent of Twilight(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:51, Reply)
just so we're clear hereI was referring to the main set of questions, not your post here.
But Darth, srsly, water under the bridge and all that, yeah?
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:54, Reply)
Oh hell yeah, ages ago mateUmbrage was taken with the sockpuppet response, nowt else
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:55, Reply)
fucking marry him already, jeez(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:52,
Reply)
They're like smaller versions of peoplebut that's not important right now
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:05, Reply)
NoNo
Eat it
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:52,
Reply)
Is this another one of Al's socks?(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:55,
Reply)
It is the same one that you always accuse of being AlBut I don't believe it is Al.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:58,
Reply)
I don't believe that you don't believe that it's al.(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:00,
Reply)
Sherlock tangles knows his shit Ray, listen to him, you might learn something(
Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:01,
Reply)
I'd be disappointed if it was AlYou might think Al is a cunt, but surely you agree he could do better than be this prick?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:04,
Reply)
I don't remember doing anything to you, what's up?(
Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:05,
Reply)
Nothing Jim, you and me are alright.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:07,
Reply)
I don't know, I've seen Al attempt to "mix things up" before.(
Kroney, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:08,
Reply)
Well you've been here a lot longer than I have.I don't know, I get bored with all the guessing who else someone might be. If people want different identities I'll interact with each one in its own right.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:11,
Reply)
Same here, I don't give a shit about sock accounts.It's just I remember Al behaving in a similar way in the past. I don't know if this is one of his and I don't care, but it does fit past posting.
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Kroney, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:14,
Reply)
it certainly has the same prick quotientAnd the bitchiness that only a pair of enormous, pendulous breasts can engender, so yeah, totes must be.
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:00, Reply)
Do you take steps to protect the real you online? Some of you lot are wide open and there are types in this world that would exploit that.
Alt: Are you any good at flirting? Do you do it without knowing and act all shocked and shit when your missus gives you that look at the supermarket checkout?
Altalt: I dunno, you folks seem to like food so what is the best use of chicken?
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:54,
Reply)
I don't really need to know but someone had to stir you fuckers out of your torpor(
Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:54,
Reply)
try better questionsprick
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:56,
Reply)
you cheeky scamp.I can never resist a snugglewuggle.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:58,
Reply)
No. Other people should take steps to protect themsleves from me.Alt: As good as I want to be.
Altalt: for producing eggs.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 12:56,
Reply)
Not reallyI'm basically invulnerable to all forms of harmful substance, including fists, germs and nasty internet words, as my impressive track record in the field of laughing off insults from fellow b3tans will demonstrate
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:03, Reply)
didn't you flounce off for a while?(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:13,
Reply)
You're thinking of Foggsy aka Wilf Lunn.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:14,
Reply)
no, I'm not.stop shit stirring you horrid man!
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:16,
Reply)
He can't help it if his dick is so thin he can do circles while he's in there (, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:26, Reply)
Nah I just had a fuckload of work on and wasn't especially fussed about b3taNeither of these things have actually changed, no idea why I'm here really
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:15, Reply)
HahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaHahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Hahaha
Ha
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:21, Reply)
Look, do you want my number or not?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:23,
Reply)
Oh fo sho No gay man worthy of his salt would turn down an in-his-prime Oscar Wilde, and you are clearly this generation's equivalent. "To pick up men", I mean seriously, gets me every time. Genius doesn't even come close.
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:26, Reply)
I'm easily as good looking as I'm original and funny too!(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:32,
Reply)
I'm not sure which part of this is funniestThe striking originality or the suggestion that there are any men worth picking up on the internet. 50something hairy-backed truckers called Geoff with powerful delusions of adequacy and deeply troubling reality issues aren't my bag, cheers
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:22, Reply)
so if they were fit you'd be well going for it then.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:23,
Reply)
Yeah manIf you can provide a picture of yourself posting on b3ta and holding a copy of today's paper then I'll judge it on its individual merits
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:25, Reply)
*falls off chair*I'll be on the next train to WHEREVER THE HELL YOU ARE
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:34, Reply)
It's the striking originality. Final answer.Definitely the first, and easily the best, gay joke made at my expense, ever. Tangles is the yardstick, brethren
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:23, Reply)
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1662088
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:23,
Reply)
I swear you flounced once when someone said they wouldn't fuck your misses. Which is a bit silly 'cus ample bosoms aren't really that important for a one off.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:33,
Reply)
The point about me being immune to the barbed wit of the internet was obviously a joke sweetie ;-)My record in this field is less than exemplary
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:36, Reply)
How can you not know if you're flirting with someone?I mean sure, I am unreliable at spotting when somebody's flirting with me, but unless you're completely inept socially and utterly lacking in sef-awareness I...oh, this is the internet, isn't it.
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Kroney, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:07,
Reply)
is whipping your cock out at the checkout flirting?(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:13,
Reply)
No, that's boasting.It's only flirting if you start wanking.
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Kroney, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:17,
Reply)
The sausage fest is never over - it's merely resting.Alt: Your missus gives me that look at the supermarket checkout, as she bags up my 11p noodles and economy ketchup.
Altalt: jerk
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:13,
Reply)
She can "bag up my noodles and ketchup" Eh? Eh?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:16,
Reply)
Yes, but not too much.Alt: I'm excellent at flirting.
Altalt: Flirting
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:14, Reply)
is that how you bagged yourself a stripper?(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:16,
Reply)
no, it's because you always pay cash in hand.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:18,
Reply)
I work for the NHS, i don't know what cash is, I pay with vouchers.(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:19, Reply)
how many food vouchers is it for a private dance?(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:22,
Reply)
they're the scowling moaney ones, right?(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:25,
Reply)
The key is to never meet anyone IRLalt: Only accidentally
altalt: Spatch-cock it, rub with thyme, olive oil and some chilli, then fuck it
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:17,
Reply)
my facebook profile is air tightalt i have forgotten how to flirt, I was good at it until malc came along and now there's absolutely no point in even trying :(
altalt fuck it
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:39, Reply)
I think Darth is bullying me, Quentin.What should I do?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:39,
Reply)
1. try not to let it upset you, he's only projecting his own inadequacies2. gather as many supportive friends and family around you as possible, try to surround yourself with love and possitivity
3. sellotape over your bumhole THIS IS MOST IMPORTANT
4. man the fuck up and call him queer or something
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:42, Reply)
Re: 3. What about when I need to poo?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:43,
Reply)
He's fuelling his missle, we don't have time to fuck around!\film
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:44,
Reply)
Meh, most people on here know what I'm like, I have no interest in whether they use that against me or not.Alt: I vary, sometimes I'm good at it, other times I'm not. Oddly, I find I'm far better at it when I have a missus than when I don't, I think it might just instil me with a confidence that I don't usually have.
Alt Alt: Depends which bit.
Full chicken - Roast it, eat with roasties, parsnips, carrots, broccoli and gravy. Strip remaining meat off carcass, have sandwiches. Put carcass into a pan, add carrots, onions, leeks and *spits* celery. Boil for several hours, strain, add any remaining chicken back in, as well as sweetcorn, some chilli, and some noodles, make soup.
Drumsticks or thighs - Use in a slow cooked curry.
Legs - I tend to get mine pre-rubbed, so I'm not too sure here, beyond slashing it, top with salt, pepper and paprika, roasting it with garlic.
Breasts - Brown whole, remove from pan, add onions and mushrooms to pan, add a little flour after a few minutes so they go gooey. Add a glass of white wine, some single cream and rather a lot of tarragon. Whilst this cooks, cut the chicken into large pieces, and add back to the sauce, effectively poaching it. Season to taste. Possible other things to add to this - Bacon, wholegrain mustard, thyme, etc. Very nice, but not cheap.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 13:54,
Reply)
If I wanted a few pints and a laugh I'd choose you an Darth, genuine article fuckers right thereAlt: Great stuff man! I'm gonna snip this, I can tell you're the kind of guy who likes his food and yoo're in the top 5 most likeable people in this place. No sarcasm here, I genuinely think you're someone I could get on with and have a laugh.
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 14:12,
Reply)
i'm retrospectively cautiousin response to jobseeking antics and working with social media, i suddenly understand how incautiouas i WAS and try to rectify this.
there ARE links, but they're not anything i'd try too far to hide.
alt: when i try, i'm fucking TERRIBLE beyond all reasonable understandig of the word. seriously, i don't know why, but it's like my brain in some kind of frantic attempt to fill awkward silences channels some kind of boris johnson-esque character. i'm surprised they can even understand me with both feet so far in my mouth i can actually walk normally, but they can.
when i DON't try, i'm reasonably successful.
altalt: KFC. fuck you. K F MOTHERFUCKING C bitch. with gravy. by the fucking lorryload. and fuck you with your bleeding heart chickenlover rhetoric. if they didn't want to be eaten, they'd have run faster, or grown wings that worked like a proper fucking bird. they WANT to be chopped into quarters, dipped in breadcrumbs, and fried.
(, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 15:05, Reply)
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