Righty-ho, another new thread seems to be necessary.
If you were creating your B3ta account for the first time today, would you still choose your name as it is now, or go for something else?

If the latter, what?

I've posted this before but I think I might go for 'Queef Richards' this time around.

Alt: my enthusiasm for hip hop has been reinvigorated over the past week. I've fallen back in love with it again in a big way. What are you enthusiastic about these days?
Altalt: What are you disillusioned about? What's let you down?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:35, 107 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

I've used sportscow for loads of logins so I'd probably stick with that I think
Queef Richards is a good one. Maybe I'd take Prick Dagger
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:36, Reply)

I would change it, probably to my RL nickname, as I'm now pretty sure I don't know anyone on here

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:36, Reply)

Bent Spastic is taken I think.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:37, Reply)

I didn't know your mum posted here?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:40, Reply)

*Naked Ape eagerly crosses out the "your mum" item on his hand written list of zings*
"Five points" he says smugly to himself, "I'm really winning the internet today"
(PsychoChomp, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:42, Reply)

The internet is the last thing I'd ever want to win at, although i appreciate that your goals in life are pretty basic and wish you good luck achieving them
Move out of family home by age 27
NHS Senior adminstrator by 2019
Achieve level 40 Orc Warrior on "Skyrim" by 2013
Grow convincing beard date TBC
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:47, Reply)

I've done all those things already.
Except it was a high elf, not an Orc
(PsychoChomp, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:49, Reply)

Was it a warrior?
Because you didn't choose your optimum warrior race, there.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:50, Reply)

you dont have classes in Skyrim
Its like Naked ape doesnt even know what hes on about.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:59, Reply)

I no nothing about Skyrim you are correct
Something about Vikings i think
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:03, Reply)

No, but you skill up in specific areas based on your focus
and some races are better in those areas than others.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:21, Reply)

Well I don't know about the others, but i would contest your beard achievment

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:51, Reply)

Your words cut deep.
No one has ever thought my beard was drawn on in eyeliner if that helps.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:06, Reply)

you've got a fucken prickname?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:38, Reply)

i do, well wen I'm with my school chums anyway

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:40, Reply)

bent spastic

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:41, Reply)

I'd not pick this
I have no idea what I would change it to though.

Thanks, I'm here all week.
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:37, Reply)

'Cool', but also 'story' - with a hint of 'bro'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:38, Reply)

That was the angle I was aiming for

( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:40, Reply)

you mean you want to be wiv da angles?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:41, Reply)

No just 4EVA IN UR HART

( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:07, Reply)

Great thread right here.
THis time in 2 weeks a nuclear powered rover the size of a mini is going to be moving around Mars, but everyone will be talking about the Olympics, shit eh?
(PsychoChomp, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:37, Reply)

I like changing my name frequently. Try and keep the Bob part or none of you would know who had posted all the witty content.
Whatcha monty.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:37, Reply)

i'd call myself the Baron

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:38, Reply)

WOuld you be free and easy with your body?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:43, Reply)

I have enough to go around

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:51, Reply)

only for cash

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:57, Reply)

Cooking, in the last year I've really enjoyed cooking and learning new recipes
i have a day of Asian cooking comng up, just need to decided which cusine to choose.

altalt: My ability to exist without lovehandles, i suspect i could be skeletal but still have them.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:39, Reply)

if i wanted to change it, i'd change it
i am enthusiastic about my upcoming holidays.

i am disillusioned about my friend's wedding. she is marrying a gimp. a cheapskate gimp. i am going to have to wear a ballgag so that i don't start coughing when the vicar asks of any good reason why, blah blah blah.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:40, Reply)

I respectfully suggest that your opinion when it comes to blokes might be on ever-so-slightly shaky ground.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:43, Reply)

i've made mistakes in the past, monty
and i'm the first to admit i've undeniably done a lot worse. i've even managed to find a lot more cheapskate. but still.

THIS GUY IS A TOOL. HE WANTED "THE DRUGS DON'T WORK" FOR THEIR FIRST DANCE, FFS. BECAUSE HE THOUGHT IT WAS "ROMANTIC".
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:45, Reply)

He sounds like a comedy genius:
isn't it about a terminally ill person?

I like this chap. He sounds excellent.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:46, Reply)

It's about somebody in the last, final death grip of cancer, or something.
Sounds pretty appropriate for a wedding, to me.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:47, Reply)

bitter and single lols

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:48, Reply)

Yep!
Though I'm not bitter about being single. More the way it came about. Just in case you care. Which you don't.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:49, Reply)

But i do care Kroney, I care a lot*



I REALLY don't care
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:52, Reply)

It's ok,
I actually am bitter about being single.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:53, Reply)

pop into central Slough on a Friday night
they'll be loads of quality gash out
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:56, Reply)

you mean this quite literally, don't you

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:57, Reply)

I pulled once at club in Slough when I was about 21 and working there.
And she wouldn't put out on a first date. I was absolutely shocked, I thought SL postcodes were Def Con Scrubber.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:00, Reply)

I saw someone shout at a woman, "Oi peachy, show us your growler"
and she did, through the kebab shop window...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:01, Reply)

nuthin' but class.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:01, Reply)

that was in Oxford rather than Slough

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:02, Reply)

Ugh
No.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:59, Reply)

you see your shit up there about fucking elves and fucking computer games?
weeeeeeeeeeellllllllllllll................
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:23, Reply)

I have many varied hobbies and interests.
You also want me to fix your computer.

sooooooooo........
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:30, Reply)

he wrote it for his mother when she was dying of cancer
the suggestion was NOT an ironic one.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:53, Reply)

She should have given Monty a call, I'm sure he could have sorted her out with something more effective

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:54, Reply)

It was his father that died
But he maintains it's about his relationship with his wife and it is actually a love song.

Either way, it's morose and also fucking impossible to dance to.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:56, Reply)

he's a hockey player
he has been in hospital 5 times this year.

all injuries caused by hockey!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:57, Reply)

He's obviously shit at it then

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:58, Reply)

at it
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:00, Reply)

that too

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:04, Reply)

For some reason I now have Sonnet going round my head.
Fucking brain.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:59, Reply)

You povvos need to stcik togeher
for warmth mainly
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:48, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1680684
(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:47, Reply)

i would pick something else for sure, dunno what tho
Alt what's made you fall back in love?
Altalt no sleep! At my cousins and this fucktard puppy won't shut up and I think a cat has "shit under the bed
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:54, Reply)

maybe try cleaning up the shit
he heard the new Chris Brown feat. Nicki Minaj track
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:58, Reply)

no. this room is ridiculously dirty and im not crawling around to find it.
When my room was dirty it wasn't this bad. Who knows what else I'll find

Which song was it? I've got the new nicki cd. Beez in da trap be beez in da trap
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:03, Reply)

I think I'd stick with captain placid
I'm really enthusiastic about driving again. I'd really gone off the whole thing to the point where I'd actively avoid travel by car if I could.
I' disillusioned with work, can't get motivated or started. I need a project and some guidance.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:56, Reply)

run down some cyclists, you'll soon be enjoying driving again
as for work maybe you should try killing yourself? I'd guide you to slit your wrists ina warm bath for maximum horror.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:59, Reply)

I always give cyclists a wide berth if possible - enough room for them to fall over without me running them over as well
As to killing myself - other than the meh factor of work I'm too contented to do that, perhaps you'd like to go first?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:06, Reply)

I'd stay the same as it's my full-time prickname
I wouldn't want to let Q down.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:57, Reply)

cheers badge, i appreciate that
big time
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 11:57, Reply)

HE LETS HIS GIRLFRIEND DOWN EVERY MORNING!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:00, Reply)

i don't want her to burst while i'm out

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:01, Reply)

burst badger?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:16, Reply)

if only he'd let me
lol
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:16, Reply)

I think I'd stick with DiT.
Alt: I've really got back in to sports as a whole, but particularly football and cycling. I'm also trying to do Twitter again, but I realised I don't have much to say unless it's sport-related.

AltAlt: I let Al down yesterday. I feel bad about it.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:04, Reply)

Course I'd choose the same name.
It's clever and witty and very fitting. I thought so when I joined b3ta and I still think so now.

Alt: design, art and sci fi.
Alt alt: job hunting.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:06, Reply)

BORED NOW
CAN I START KICKIN OFF AGAIN?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:09, Reply)

Fuckin clamshell packaging cunts

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:10, Reply)

La Senza?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:16, Reply)

eh?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:16, Reply)

im no longer a fan of cats
After being with my dog for so long and not being around them I realise how annoying they are
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:11, Reply)

Rubbish.
Cats are awesome and dogs smell.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:19, Reply)

I'd go for either Lionel Blair or Nick Griffin for my username.
Alt- I got back in to house recently. I may also get back into skating, I need to get toned up again.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:12, Reply)

ice skating?
in the skin tight glittery sequins?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:23, Reply)

he's trying to one-up darth, the cheeky cunt

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:24, Reply)

soooooo mannnnnny striiiiiike throoooooughs...

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:26, Reply)

surely a "+ stick"
would do?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:29, Reply)

you wish, babygirl
Skateboarding. It's great exercise and properly tones legs, stomach and arse.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:24, Reply)

It is an activity that 32 year old men definitely don't look ridiculous doing, too.

( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:28, Reply)

meh.
Would I care? Of course not. 32 year old men look silly doing loads of things.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:31, Reply)

Rodney Mullen is 45 and still looks awesome

( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:31, Reply)

I'm sure.

( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:32, Reply)

dozer will be poot;ling around york though, not ripping ripping it up in LA or Miami

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:33, Reply)

I still skate
I reckon I look less ridiculous skating than I do cycling
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:35, Reply)

I'd just got the hang of fakie when I stopped.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:39, Reply)

York has some good spots actually.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:36, Reply)

Rodders is a legend, he really is.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:33, Reply)

I'd choose Dog The Bounty Eater.
Alt: I'm not enthusiastic about anything at the moment. I'm more jaded than a chinaman's mantlepiece.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:25, Reply)

Re your Alt...
I hope you'll be over this by September. Not sure I fancy a hip hop night out.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:26, Reply)

like you won't be too cunted to understand any of it

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:27, Reply)

That isn't the point.
I don't have 'da riddum' for a hip hop night.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:31, Reply)

Catholic night?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:37, Reply)

Those bitchez be guilt trippin'

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:41, Reply)

You could see my freestyle breaks

( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:29, Reply)

I dunno Jeff, give it a go.
Have a listen to the fabriclive mix by DJ Spinbad. It's great.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:29, Reply)

Hahaha "spinbad"
Like the sailor. I get it.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:31, Reply)

Hahaha "Kroney"

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:32, Reply)

I don't always take the piss, you know.

( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:33, Reply)

dunno why you laugh though.
It's just a stage name, it's like when bands have a name rather than just calling themselves 'Tony, John, Brian and David'.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:35, Reply)

Monty has their first yellow vinyl gatefold sleeve limited edition 12"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:36, Reply)

I thought the pun was funny.
I like puns. It was quite clever because it's "Spinbad", "spin" for the DJ bit, "bad" being the colloquial "street" term for "sick", "illin'" or otherwise "good" ie "badass". It also references a pirate. Pirates are also "sick", "illin'" or otherwise "good" ie "badass".

In conclusion, I "laughed" because it was "funny".
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:39, Reply)

I got called a pirate in Nation of Shopkeepers
Even though their door policy proscribes them.

I even explained 'the angry pirate' to the barman.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:42, Reply)

I have never successfully delivered a completed Angry Pirate.
I have tried though. I have tried.
( Kroney, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 12:43, Reply)