BBC NEWS LINK
www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-18968229

I would lol hard if I recieved that text. Who would take this shit seriously?

How are you going to enjoy the sunshine this afternoon?
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:02, 123 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

sympathy reply

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:03, Reply)

sympathy argument

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:03, Reply)

Sympathy changing the subject and claiming thats what I meant all along.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:04, Reply)

Sympathy reply tailored specifically to your last post
much in the way that supermarkets operate.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:09, Reply)

Ah yes, I'm so glad Naked Ape showed me the error of my ways on that one.
Well, told me he could show me the error of my ways, he just wont.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:13, Reply)

He did
It just wasn't tailored especially for you
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:14, Reply)

It's TOP SECRET marketing stuff Chompers,
it's not for the likes of you or I.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:14, Reply)

That's true, that's true. If only I had known what I was talking about :(

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:16, Reply)

My mum would.
She took one of those 'virus by telephone call from India' calls very seriously indeed. The dozy bitch.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:07, Reply)

Ha ha, they're so fucking obvious as well.
I see where you get your technical knowhow from.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:08, Reply)

In fairness she didn't actually believe the fellow
but she did think she'd been personally targetted as opposed to it being some poor cunt sat in a tin shed in Bongo-Bongo land with a Hampshire phone book on his lap.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:11, Reply)

Yes, I've had elderly relatives saying they're worried about their computers...
One uncle of mine pays some bloke to download all the 'updates' his pc needs. The bloke has unrestricted access to my uncle's laptop at all times. I strongly suspect it's full of pr0n hidden somewhere.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:09, Reply)

Blimey Mark II
First a Windy Pig and then a chickenlady

Has Noah started posting on here or something?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:15, Reply)

Noah's been busy keeping unicorns at bay.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:18, Reply)

Good lad
Sticking their fucking noses in all the time
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:29, Reply)

Nearly had the dodo's eye out.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:37, Reply)

People take chain letters seriously
People will believe most things, especially if they think they're at risk.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:07, Reply)

Why are people so stupid? I think we need to put some smart pills in the water.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:10, Reply)

But who would make the smart pills, and what would they have in them?
Someone would get scared because they'd watched Soylent Green and it'd all be banned.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:12, Reply)

If they made smart pills, some div would choke to death on one.
Also, hello there.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:13, Reply)

I haven't heard the word 'div' in years :)
Hello too!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:14, Reply)

We're not too far off "smart pills" they could be widely available in the next 5 years.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:15, Reply)

Quick
Forward this on to 4567 people you know within 10 seconds and see what happens*


*4566 people message you back calling you a cunt
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:13, Reply)

"If you don't forward it you'll have bad luck for seven years"
And this is different to my everyday life, how?
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:16, Reply)

Good afternoon, lovely lady.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:38, Reply)

Afternoon, how're you?

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:42, Reply)

Not too bad thanks, you?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:46, Reply)

Fine thanks.
Busy uploading all my work stuff to Dropbox so I can get more space to download crappy tv torrents :)
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:51, Reply)

Woo!
I've got quite a lot of crappy TV to catch up on at the minute, including 3 series I downloaded but I haven't watched past the first episode in any of them.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:58, Reply)

What were they?

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:00, Reply)

They're programs broadcast on television, but that's not important right now.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:11, Reply)

Psych, The Mighty Johnsons and Sanctuary

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:23, Reply)

it took me 2 minutes to figure out that 'psych' was the name of a tv show
i thought you were pj and duncaning her
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:26, Reply)

Never heard of any of them.
What are they about? I don't tend to watch much on tv these days, instead waiting for boxed sets and torrents. Although I have just signed up for Sky+ anytime where (apparently) you can look at ten years of tv.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

Anytime Plus is rather good

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)

Haven't managed to get it working yet - our telephone line needs sorting out as when I connect it all the broadband is knocked out
Think we probably need to get a man in to sort it.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:37, Reply)

I managed to wangle a free wireless connector for mine as usefully my living room does not have a phone point

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:39, Reply)

Ah...
I have the wireless connector....ooh, I wonder if I can just get it to work then...
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)

Psych is another buddy cop show, it seems. Looked quite funny from the trailers, so I picked that up.
The Mighty Johnsons is an Australian comedy series about reincarnated Viking Gods, very funny so far.
Sanctuary is odd, I can't really describe it beyond that yet.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

Almighty Johnsons is Kiwi
Very good though.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 16:25, Reply)

What about this one?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-18970461

'Got any 'O's?'
'Paanty 'ose?'

'Nah, underage 'Os.'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:08, Reply)

Who'd have thought a guy who looks like that would be charged with a sex offence?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:09, Reply)

I reckon he's innocent for sure.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:12, Reply)

Good "recent" pic there

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:13, Reply)

Ha ha, I didn't notice that.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:14, Reply)

AA 25 years ago

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:29, Reply)

At the end of next month, you'll be fairly correct.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:38, Reply)

Hmm, which month could you mean?

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:44, Reply)

End of August, I mean.
So, you're either Battered or Al?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:46, Reply)

Al has been disproved and in the case of t'other how very dare you

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:47, Reply)

Poor bastard.
Appearing at Uxbridge Magistrate's Court.

Insult to injury, right there.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:38, Reply)

If that picture was him at 19 i'm not surprised he ended up a nonce
no woman would touch him.
( Peej, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:26, Reply)

Idiots and old people, I'd say
Pint after work, that's about it, really.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:39, Reply)

I had a wander round town at lunchtime
It was lovely and not at all chock full of short skirts

Our office is currently at 27.5C though
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:52, Reply)

i'm going to take my shirt trousers shoes socks and pants off, and run into the sea in a very un-british display of youthful exuberance.
then run out and stand on the beach shivering and imploring my testicles to descend back into their intended container.
then i'm going to eat, drink, and smoke.

there is a celebratory reason for this sort of behaviour, other than mere sunshine.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 14:58, Reply)

Are you celebrating because you had two lunches?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:01, Reply)

one lunch
trying to be less fo a fat fuck lately.. gym and the like. no, it's for another reason
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:04, Reply)

Are you celebrating a recent win at the national vagueness on the internet awards?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:06, Reply)

i can tell you this much
i am definitely on the internets. at points.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:13, Reply)

Glad we cleared all that up there
*mops brow*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:13, Reply)

haha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:13, Reply)

ok basically
since you've internet-grilled me like a fucking e-ribeye
i done handed in my notice at one job and got another closer to home. 2 hours closer to home.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:16, Reply)

See, this is a good thing
Now hand back in the crown of vagueness at once
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:18, Reply)

it is rather a good thing, isn't it?
3.5hrs a day minimum of my life back. plus a social life in my home town, where i'd just moved before starting the epic commuting job.. all in all you can see why i might be rather chipper.
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:22, Reply)

Can I get a woop?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

you can get a
'splendid old bean' or possibly a 'top-hole wotwotwot!'
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)

Much better

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:39, Reply)

Olympic torch guy has just come through Uxbridge
on a fucking bus.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:01, Reply)

I think they should have just sprayed petrol all over the route and then lit it.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:02, Reply)

That would have been class!
The long distance runners in team GB could then be forced to keep ahead of the flame
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:14, Reply)

I just had a Cornetto Enigma.
It was very nice. I also had some cookies. I really, really like biscuits.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:18, Reply)

Or was it?!?!
*wiggles eyebrows*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:19, Reply)

Yeah it was.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:22, Reply)

Hugz4U bbz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:24, Reply)

*snuggles*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1681980
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:25, Reply)

I am with you on that one.
I only ever buy from when Tesco's have them on the cheap, then I binge my ass off on them. My record is five.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:27, Reply)

By which I mean 'my favourite record is by 5ive'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1682063
( Kroney, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

No, that's not the one I have - it's 'Get on Up' as Vidkun Quentsling below has correctly surmised.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

Beers soon.

( Kroney, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

Yes please.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

Beer tonight!
WOOP
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

Kid tonight - double woop!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

I like this
Is this before she departs on holiday?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)

Payday this weekend
so any time after that, really. Before it gets cold and rainy and dark in the evenings again, for preference.
( Kroney, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)

get on up?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

It's achingly beautiful.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:30, Reply)

you fat fucker
i must be diabetic or something, i was falling into a coma after each one last night

beer might have been a factor
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

I'm fit as a flea, me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

On your canal dog maybe

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

He was 'nom'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

...by which I mean 'a caring and sensitive lover'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

Genuine officelolling all over the place now
you cunt
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

By which I mean 'I have fleas, me'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:31, Reply)

I totally drove past where you must work earlier. Twice.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

Way cool, brah.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:35, Reply)

Fat fuck

( Kroney, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:28, Reply)

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Yeah, taht's right, I drew a luger what of it?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:27, Reply)

Quints, I sometime get a bit of a lob on when I see you posting.
Is that normal?
( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

He is pant-twitchingly entertaining at times

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

don't ask me mate, i ain't a plumber

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:32, Reply)

Oh, in which case you can't fix my radiator either.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:33, Reply)

i'd give it a bash

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)

You should follow a 7 point plan

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:34, Reply)

TGB's lovely ex-company delivered me two towel rails for rather cheap
Go TGB!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:36, Reply)

Oh man, they only delivered me one.
She must love you more.

:(
( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:40, Reply)

Huge they were too
Actually worked out as cheap as buying one from most other places I looked
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:41, Reply)

Yeah, the special TGB discount made them phenomenal value.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:44, Reply)

eh?
"worked out as cheap as buying one from most other places I looked"
so the same price as if you'd just gone to a shop and got it?

what saving?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

Half price you fucken MORON

( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:55, Reply)

nobody mentioned half price
check my quote again MOTHERFUCKER
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:56, Reply)

YES HE DID YOU SPASTIC TWAT!
He said the cost of two from TGB was the same as one from somewhere else. Which means it's the same as HALF FUCKEN PRICE YOU DICK EARED WANKSOCK.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:59, Reply)

HE DIDN'T HE SAID HE BOUGHT TWO AND THEY WORKED OUT AS CHEAP AS BUYING ONE FROM A SHOP
HE DID NOT SPECIFY THAT THE ONE FROM THE SHOP WAS TWICE AS EXPENSIVE AS THE TWO THAT HE GOT FOR HALF THE PRICE
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 16:02, Reply)

I got a free banjolele with them
This made them both bigger and cheaper
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 16:06, Reply)

i'm always being bullied :(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 16:11, Reply)

I had a BBQ last night
Homemade mixed beef and lamb burgers, tonight we're doing lamb chops.

I put them in to marinade in oil, garlic and vinegar last night.

I predict they will contain a significant percentage of win.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:42, Reply)

What kind of vinegar?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:43, Reply)

I don't know why I wrote vinegar.
I meant rosemary.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:44, Reply)

I thought it seemed odd
But a red wine type vinegar could help to break down the meat a little
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:45, Reply)

yeah i hate lamb

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:53, Reply)

Do I have to start every thread today?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:46, Reply)

No.

( Bazongaloid, Tue 24 Jul 2012, 15:48, Reply)