The guy sitting near to me keeps doing lines from Monty Python & The Holy Grail
What should I throw at him to shut him up?

Alt: Outside of the above and Withnail & I what is the most quoted film by people in your social circle? There's a good line in the film 'Highlander' about oafish clansmen but I can't remember it right now.

Altalt: Best sauce to go with a bacon, egg and mushroom bap/roll/cob/sammich. Or no sauce at all?
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 15:55, 98 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Don't be silly nobody here has a "social circle"

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 15:58, Reply)

I've got a chalk line around my "gaming pc" which I don't let anyone cross over.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:00, Reply)

Please stop assuming your own inedequacies are shared by everyone else.
Thanks x
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:01, Reply)

can you all just grow up a little you lot act like stupid kids.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:01, Reply)

You're spoiling this site which used to be a lot of fun

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:02, Reply)

Or perhaps just slightly less shit.

( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:04, Reply)

YAY!

(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:06, Reply)

I was just thinking about you...
as proved on FB!
( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:06, Reply)

Awesome!
How are you?
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:07, Reply)

Making people redundant.
They don't like it.
Neither do I, really.
I wish I was a psychopath.
How are you?
( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:08, Reply)

Oh that sucks, can you come and make some of our staff redundant?
But you'll also need to find replacements as we really need staff, just not the incompetent shitcunts we currently have.

I spent an hour this morning making a crib sheet on how to use our telephones.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Maybe I should come over there and be your PA.
How fucking awesome would that be?
( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:12, Reply)

It would be brilliant.
We actually need someone to do lots of admin things, but the job would be at our main office, so not near me :(
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:13, Reply)

I might apply anyway...

( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:16, Reply)

Did you just do a sick and then post a picture on facebook?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:08, Reply)

I hope you get loads of sexaully agressive messages and it makes you cry and your girlfriend has to step in to sort everything out.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)

Now Chompy,
this isn't playing nicely, is it?
( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)

He deserves it, I saw him use an apostrophe incorrectly once.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:10, Reply)

A what?
(Ninja edits are one thing - monging back in ten minutes later to clear up your slops is quite another.)
( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:11, Reply)

HAHAHAHAHA
What a twat.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:13, Reply)

SHUT UP YOURE ALL BULLYING!

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:14, Reply)

Dear God, man,
think about your grammar and punctuation.
( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:15, Reply)

His grammar's dead! Don't be so insensitive!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:21, Reply)

4eva in ar harts and mindes tho

( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:22, Reply)

He's worse than Mighters.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:14, Reply)

There are few things worse than Mighters in this life Monty, one of those things is fat bobby.
I'm honestly not sure if you can count Chompy in with that group, but I'm willing to give it the benefit of the doubt.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:20, Reply)

I'm usually right about these things Al.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:21, Reply)

*puts on benefits*

( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:24, Reply)

(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:28, Reply)

Well yes, quite.

( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:35, Reply)

Terrible bullying, etc etc.
MODS!
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:34, Reply)

Nope, no idea here. sorry.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:14, Reply)

Shall we just pretend he never happened?

( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:15, Reply)

I wish that were possible.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:18, Reply)

Throw a printout of Vag's dismal 'Python' thread from earlier.
By the time he gets three posts into it he'll kill himself. If I didn't have a child depending on my income I certainly would have.

Alt: The entire scripts of Highlander and The Running Man are utter genius. Withnail and I is heap of shit which appeals to students and wankers who STILL think getting 'rahlly, rahlly pissed' is cool.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:00, Reply)

Oh and PS, say 'sammich' one more time and I will electrocute you.
x
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:02, Reply)

all of them sound totes nyom

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:08, Reply)

Alright Legoland?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:02, Reply)

Is this leona dolebanger then?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:07, Reply)

I believe so.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:12, Reply)

tell him he's a very naughty boy!

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:07, Reply)

Altalt: Brown. There is no other response. None. Whatsoever.
Monty goes on about Giacomo all the time with a shit Geordie accent.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:08, Reply)

The expected response from a shitstabber such as yourself.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:09, Reply)

You didn't complain when we were in Bristol.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:12, Reply)

You promised you wouldn't tell.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:15, Reply)

It really is a shit Geordie accent - it's supposed to be a St Helen's one.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:13, Reply)

I see.
NEEDS MOAR PIE.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:15, Reply)

Needs moar GIACAMURRRR

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:17, Reply)

ah nur man

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:23, Reply)

Please kill yourself

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:08, Reply)

Unbelievably, not one of the Monty Python quotations from Vag's thread has made it onto the popular page yet.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:15, Reply)

It must be broken. Silly popular page!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:17, Reply)

Best thread ever.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:19, Reply)

NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE
NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE
NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE
NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE
NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE
NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE NEEE
(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:19, Reply)

lolclikindis

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:20, Reply)

LOL
Clickin dis
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:20, Reply)

Tarquin Fin-tim-lin-bin-whin-bim-lim-bus-stop-F'tang-F'tang-Olé-Biscuitbarrel

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:22, Reply)

That's just not funny.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:25, Reply)

What?
That's fresh from 1970.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:27, Reply)

It about as fresh as Jade Goody's spam purse

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:28, Reply)

A bison head
Alt: Point Break, greatest movie EVA

Ketchup always, brown sauce is for plebs and northerns
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:26, Reply)

Ketchup for sausage, Brown for bacon
You know nothing.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:29, Reply)

Bollocks
Ketchup for Bacon and Sausage sarnies. Brown is for mixing in with baked beans. And BBQ is for chips.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:30, Reply)

I like ketchup and mayonnaise with my chips
I might go to the chippy tonight \o/
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:32, Reply)

Ketchup and mayo is know as "bloody cum"

(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:35, Reply)

What if there's a bit of mustard as well?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:37, Reply)

Then you're wrong
and your winky is probably a bit messed up too.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:38, Reply)

you beardy brummie nonce, brown sauce is for mouth wrongs

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:30, Reply)

You crossed the line. People trusted you and they died. You gotta' go down.
Classic!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:29, Reply)

altalt: this stuff is frickin' A, dude:
www.thepickleman.co.uk/hot%20tomato%20sauce.html
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:31, Reply)

(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:31, Reply)

I am genuinely hypnotised by this.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:33, Reply)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:40, Reply)

That's quite spooky.
Can you make it any bigger?
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:41, Reply)

Woops, what that last one too much? I've deleted it now.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:45, Reply)

Why is there one missing from the second row?
are you just trying to flush out the OCDers?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:42, Reply)

Fucking Ninja.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:44, Reply)

Haha, also added another row to the top.
MAFFS IZ FUN
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:45, Reply)

I'm having an acid flashback now.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:43, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jlNyxzG2rM
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:48, Reply)

Dearie me

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:55, Reply)

\o/

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:34, Reply)

Have you ever had Stoke's Ketchup? Dead good.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:34, Reply)

I think I had it at your gaff, Gonzie old boy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:36, Reply)

Ahh, yeah', I remember putting that in =)
How about the HP Guiness sauce? DId I show you that one?

I got an invite to MoshiMoshi in Liverpool St next week, all on the house =D
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:39, Reply)

Text me back, you pesky nob.

( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:39, Reply)

Haha, didn't hear it go off =)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:47, Reply)

But you just texted me to ask me something!
Oh man...my response to 'them' will be good *plots*
( thealternativefact, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:50, Reply)

There's some of that Guinness one in the fridge at my office for some reason.
Not sure if I've tried it though. Nice one on the free grub.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:40, Reply)

GIve it a shot on some pre-cooked chicken, trust me blud, dead good.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:47, Reply)

A man wakes up one morning in Alaska to find a bear on his roof. So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there's an ad for 'Bear Removers.' He calls the number, and the bear remover says he'll be over in 30 minutes.

The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He's got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a mean old pit bull.

'What are you going to do,' the homeowner asks?

'I'm going to put this ladder up against the roof, and then I'm going to go up there and knock the bear off the roof with this baseball bat. When the bear falls off, the pit bull is trained to grab his testicles and not let go. The bear will then be subdued enough for me to put him in the cage in the back of the van.'

He hands the shotgun to the homeowner.

'What's the shotgun for?' asks the homeowner.

'If the bear knocks me off the roof, shoot the dog.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:31, Reply)

This is actually quite funny.
and if you take into account who told the joke, it's even funnier.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:32, Reply)

Thanks, Superfly.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:32, Reply)

You're very welcome stunned.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:34, Reply)

Needs moar 'choccie biccie'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:34, Reply)

D-
See me after class
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:34, Reply)

Haha

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:39, Reply)

I liked the Arnold the Anus cartoon
where Arnold was stretching a friend and the reader asked what he was doing and Arnold replied "I'm widening the circle of my friends"

it was well good that
( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 16:43, Reply)