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	Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW?  Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
	
	(
 rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
 
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	So Battered? Two foot of angry spastic or basically a good kid just tryin ta get by in a crazy mixed-up world?
 	Keyword: eppy
	(
 Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:11,
	
122 replies,
	
latest was 12 years ago)
 
	
	stop stomping
 	and answer my wicked questions
	(
 rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:12,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Ha ha
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:12,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Deep down I think he's a good un
 	Keyword:Empathy
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:14,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I have said it before, and I will say it again, 
 	I'm not sure about Battered.
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:14,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Any particular reason?
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:15,
	
Reply)
 
	
	nope. 
 	I've just never got the measure of you. Not in a horrid way mind.
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:22,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Ah. I see.
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:25,
	
Reply)
 
	
	4' 8"
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:27,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I've become addicted to wet shaving my head, Windy
 	It feels wonderful.
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:18,
	
Reply)
 
	
	i thought you had a jew fro?
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:20,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Lord no
 	I've been shaving my bonce for about 15 years.
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:21,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Theoban has the curly locks of a yid. 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:23,
	
Reply)
 
	
	that's what I thought
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:24,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I asked me mum and I think she's an anti semite cos she looked dead horrified at the prospect of the family being all jewy
 	
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:37,
	
Reply)
 
	
	check for other isms
 	turn up for a sunday dinner blacked up
	(
 glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:40,
	
Reply)
 
	
	and wearing a burkha
 	 and do a sort of bucks fizz unveiling while observing her reaction
	(
 glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:41,
	
Reply)
 
	
	But we're a family of muslim B&W minstrels?
 	Gluey it's like you don't even know me at all :(
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:42,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I'd love to shave your head one day. I think it would be highly arousing. 
 	I'm currently trying to decide on a new style of facial hair for the summer.
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:21,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Handlebar moustache
 	Perfect in your line of work.
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:24,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I've already got one of them stoopid . 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:46,
	
Reply)
 
	
	WELL THEN GET ANOTHER ONE
 	jeeeeeeeez
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:48,
	
Reply)
 
	
	handlebar eyebrows are the new handlebar moustache
 	
	(
 glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:50,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I'm totally imagining this the troi and ryker beard shaving in the bath scene
 	DON'T TELL YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS
	(
 glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:31,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Here you go buy yourself something nice for the summer xx
 	www.goateesaver.com/
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:32,
	
Reply)
 
	
	A little from column a)
 	A little from column b)
Keyword: vaginal discharge
	(
 the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:15,
	
Reply)
 
	
	 
 	A from column a)A from column b)l discharge
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:19,
	
Reply)
 
	
	chocho? Is that you chocho?
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:20,
	
Reply)
 
	
	v v NAHHH look down there v v 
 	
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:21,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Little little keyword: vagina?
 	
	(
 the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:20,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Yes 
 	
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:22,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I think he seems charming
 	And I'm an 
excellent judge of character.
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:17,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Apart from that awful racist woman you married.
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:18,
	
Reply)
 
	
	1 mistake out of 1000's, Tangled
 	
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:19,
	
Reply)
 
	
	was she the one from the youtube video of a tram in Croydon?
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:23,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I think he's alright, but he does seem to use this place to just vent anger and when he's in that sort of mood he's a prick.
 	
	(
PsychoChomp, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:19,
	
Reply)
 
	
	So you think it's okay that he cheated on his wife with a sex worker and then blamed her for the breakdown of their marriage?
 	
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:24,
	
Reply)
 
	
	No one is suggesting Battered slept with _ _ _    _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:26,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Quentingazgate still worries you, eh?
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:27,
	
Reply)
 
	
	i'm feeling nie today, don't want to get anyone angry
 	they might write something mean about me in their sig
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:28,
	
Reply)
 
	
	You're feeling what today?
 	
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:34,
	
Reply)
 
	
	 
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:36,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Run it's the old Bill
 	
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:40,
	
Reply)
 
	
	nice
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:36,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Snow White?
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:30,
	
Reply)
 
	
	You have a way of seeing into the truth of things Al.
 	
	(
PsychoChomp, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:26,
	
Reply)
 
	
	He may seem like a square peg in a round hole, but I think he fits perfectly.
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:20,
	
Reply)
 
	
	+ in my arse
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:20,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I dunno he looks a bit funny, and smells a bit funny
 	but he's like a "very fierce" puppy, small very noisy but not actually dangerous in any way.
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:22,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I've now got the hang of using my straight razor
 	and my face didn't leak at all after last nights shave.
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:23,
	
Reply)
 
	
	So not a waste of money then?
 	
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:24,
	
Reply)
 
	
	No, I think it will pay for itself in spades as the blades cost peanuts compared with Gillette cartridges.
 	
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:25,
	
Reply)
 
	
	How long before you got used to it? and is there any lasting damage?
 	
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:26,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Unfortunately not
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:31,
	
Reply)
 
	
	so al manages to use a cutthroat razor, one of the most dangerous of all bathroom based implements, and remains unscathed.
 	You, however use a safty razor and take a chunk out of your forehead?
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:34,
	
Reply)
 
	
	 
 	yes
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:35,
	
Reply)
 
	
	hahahaha
 	
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:38,
	
Reply)
 
	
	It's taken me about 4 attempts to feel comfortable
 	and I reckon I'll get better as I still miss the odd bit.
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:32,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I have thought about investing in one but have yet to pluck up the courage 
 	
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:42,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Just do it.
 	But take you time while shaving, and accept that the first few times your face will hurt.
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:44,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I have been asked what I wanted for Father’s day 
 	This is now on the top of the list
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:46,
	
Reply)
 
	
	this is wonderful news
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:24,
	
Reply)
 
	
	If you want to pop round I'll give you a wet shave.
 	
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:25,
	
Reply)
 
	
	will you do my crack and scak?
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:26,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I wouldn't recomend it to be honest.
 	
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:33,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Al, you use a cutthroat razor?
 	That is well steampunk.
	(
 Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:31,
	
Reply)
 
	
	It's actually one of the ones the barbers use where you break a double sided blade in half and put it in a "shavette" as it's called
 	But yes, it gives my beards and moustache a very steampunk feel.
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:32,
	
Reply)
 
	
	How many beards do you have exactly?
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:33,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Two, one for everyday and one for best.
 	
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:34,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Excellent answer
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:34,
	
Reply)
 
	
	They look rather dangerous
 	I'll stick to a scalpel blade and a bit of masking tape.
	(
 Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:35,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Well you're all made up as far as I'm concerned
 	But I dunno why Battered is seen as worse than the rest of you awful human beings
Except Windy he's my favourite
Favourite made up 'person' on the internet
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:23,
	
Reply)
 
	
	How many songs has Windy written and recorded about SBP, eh?
 	NONE, that's how many.
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:26,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I dunno who you are soz
 	I can't keep up with all this name changing
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:30,
	
Reply)
 
	
	You can be so hurtful sometimes
 	
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:33,
	
Reply)
 
	
	AW BUNNY YOU CAN'T BE ANGRY WIV ME
 	Luv you loads twoey
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:34,
	
Reply)
 
	
	This is why I keep coming back
 	Your sweet lovin'
	(
 Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:36,
	
Reply)
 
	
	one day theo, we'll get married. 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:49,
	
Reply)
 
	
	In common with many other B3tans I've met in real life,
 	Battered is a fine fellow, working hard to be a cunt on the internet.
	(
 Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:24,
	
Reply)
 
	
	In that case he needs a RAISE 
 	tee hee
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:25,
	
Reply)
 
	
	this is why that thread was created about you
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:28,
	
Reply)
 
	
	YES.
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:28,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Pfftttt....
 	I liked it
	(
 hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:29,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I'm setting up a LinkedIn account at work.
 	Inappropriate? Desperate spastic?
Had it for ages and couldn't be fucked with it, then thought meeeeeeh.
	(
 Kroney, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:47,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Make sure you add Battered, Dozer and Nakers.
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:47,
	
Reply)
 
	
	+ AA & Sporters.
 	Oh, and DG too.
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:48,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Christ, have you considered setting up a new account?
 	
	(
 tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:49,
	
Reply)
 
	
	isn't LiC on there as well?
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:49,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Yep.
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:51,
	
Reply)
 
	
	AA?
 	HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:49,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I got approaches for some consultancy jobs from LinkedIn
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:59,
	
Reply)
 
	
	As long as they aren't looking for male grooming advice
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:01,
	
Reply)
 
	
	My forehead is as smooth as a babies bottom, thank you
 	
	(
 sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:02,
	
Reply)
 
	
	head nonce
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:04,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Contact Kroney for: 
 	- Cardigans
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:49,
	
Reply)
 
	
	No fucking way I'm endorsing that bogey green piece of shit
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:50,
	
Reply)
 
	
	what does LinkedIn offer that I can't? 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:50,
	
Reply)
 
	
	a picture of battered
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:51,
	
Reply)
 
	
	really? 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:54,
	
Reply)
 
	
	yu have one?
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:56,
	
Reply)
 
	
	have one what? 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Possible employment opportunities.
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:51,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Only if you're the sort of cunt who uses LinkedIn
 	
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:52,
	
Reply)
 
	
	what's wrong with it?
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:56,
	
Reply)
 
	
	It's just a bit pointless
 	and it leads to you getting pestered by recruitment consultants all the time.
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:57,
	
Reply)
 
	
	not really...
 	I know several people who have got good jobs through it, easy enough to ignore recruiters
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:58,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Well I don't know anyone who has got a good job out of it.
 	So you're wrong.
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:03,
	
Reply)
 
	
	internet arguing 101 here
 	
	(
 Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I've never heard of that
 	So you're wrong.
	(
Bazongaloid, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:07,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Yeah, I mean, a company with a market valuation of $18 billion, clearly offers no benefits to its users.
 	
	(
 Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:09,
	
Reply)
 
	
	yeh but b3ta is worth $87 BILLION and look how shit it is
 	
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:11,
	
Reply)
 
	
	If you put 'dogging' down as a skill you can get laid off it four times a day
 	CAN YOU DO THAT?
No you cannot
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:52,
	
Reply)
 
	
	I can. 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 14:54,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Walking round Oxford carrying a banner stating you 'Fuck like a Sex Weasel' isn't the same Piggo
 	Now I know your Oxfordites go for that, and fair play to them, but Kroney wants some quality dogging here, and you can't provide that
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:57,
	
Reply)
 
	
	well, I just want him to know that if his LinkedIn dogging plan fails, I'm here for him. 
 	
	(
 Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 9 May 2013, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	
	You're all heart and no mistake
 	Well mostly heart, some bumhole too
	(
 Theoban What of it, Thu 9 May 2013, 15:05,
	
Reply)
 
	
	Well, the man knows his oven gloves, that's all I can say
 	
	(
 Reginald Donkeyfuck, Thu 9 May 2013, 14:50,
	
Reply)
 
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