I'd like a moment of your time, please.
Today, internet 'character', 'gamer', microbrewer and micropenis owner, King of the Redlands, MK Ultra, the hardest working man in showbusiness, Psychochomp is 30 years old*.

Post your Chompy-related good wishes and congratulations here.
Share your memories of the man like Chomp-Dogg and how he has touched your life. Or your missus.

*I think this is right
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:24, 86 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

*pours pint*

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:31, Reply)

*onto kerb*
one for my Hommies
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:43, Reply)

Who could forget this piece of all-time classic internet:
b3ta.com/questions/anon/post615785?highlight=answers-post-615796
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:35, Reply)

Still one of my Fav. b3ta posts EVAH

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:37, Reply)

Slightly ruined by the overenthusiastic responses of some flids but hey ho, not Chompy's fault.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:38, Reply)

I'd like to extend my very best wishes to Mr Chomp on this joyous occasion
I hope to see as many of you as possible at P***a E*****s at Xscape, MK this evening for the s******e p***y!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:47, Reply)

*winks theatrically*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:49, Reply)

i a
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:56, Reply)

theatracally?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:57, Reply)

Yeah I really don't get this one.
I think *someone's* been at the 'breakfast cyder'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:02, Reply)

Oh arr oh arr aay

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:03, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1951651
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 May 2013, 8:56, Reply)

Well it's plain to see from the popularity of this thread, the popularity of the man himself.
lol
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:03, Reply)

Vegetables was better
Tangles was positively tumescant
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:05, Reply)

I was too aroused to even participate in that thread.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:07, Reply)

I think I know a few things about this one
As follows:

Milton Keynes
oven gloves
fosters drinker
rapey
something to do with rachelswipe that everyone alludes to vaguely but never in too much detail in a 'I know something you don't know' kinda way
Gingham shirts

Happy Birthday Ya Flamin Galar!
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:04, Reply)

I like it when he knows more about something than somebody else

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:04, Reply)

Ok, this was one of my favourite witty chompy moments, in which he sums up people's characters based on their posting style:
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1553700
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:06, Reply)

There are some good Lols it that thread

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:12, Reply)

God you're so middle aged

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:13, Reply)

I no rite :(

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:16, Reply)

Good news for all you terribly endebted people, groaning under the weight of your repayments
It's pay day today! Boom £5 more paid off!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:17, Reply)

I'm afraid I spent this week's loan repayment in the pub.
WHEN WILL THIS VICIOUS CIRCLE OF DEBT END???
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:20, Reply)

I see there is already a "facebook page" called "RIP Drummer Lee Rigby"
with a load of people saying "RIP you brave soldier".

Does it make me an awful person to find these massive outpourings of public grief directed very personally at people they've never met to be not just odd, but actively shit?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:37, Reply)

I see the not even thinly vieled racism has already started there too.
"A guy who fights a war and returns safe, Gets back to the uk leave camp and get done over , stabbed and killed by two guy who should'nt be in the uk anyway. Those two guy should be delivered on to the ranges for target practice. RIP Lad"

And the delusional:

"Rest in peace young man. The name LEE RIGBY will be remembered forever. I hope that we can all unite in our grief and horror and find a way to rid our once great nation of these disgusting animals and bring freedom and peace to our children and grandchildren again"
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:39, Reply)

And the totally sidetracked
"Don't know what to say I'm so disgusted in our country policies we are the first country to help other countries out when we are supposed to be struggling ourselves and this is how it ends up with the death of a young man who put his life on the line for another country, survived came home to be with his beautiful wife and son only to be slaughtered in his own home town. Sorry but its about time Britain looked after its own and stopped worrying about other countries because this is what happens when you let things get to soft Grow a back bone Britain times like this I'm ashamed of where i come from so angry"
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:39, Reply)

Beautiful?
She was a fucking hippo
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:42, Reply)

hahaha clickin dis
good old b3ta
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:43, Reply)

Oh man if the Daily Mail see this I'm done for

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:45, Reply)

P4K1'S 0UT!!!!!!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:43, Reply)

No, it makes you a sensible and rational human being.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:42, Reply)

he's still a cunt though

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:43, Reply)

*checks iTunes chart for Little Drummer Boy*

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:42, Reply)

This page treats the whole issue rationally and with sensitivity:
•Link fail? :(
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:46, Reply)

I tell you who's got the right ideas about this stuff - that Nigel Rees

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:56, Reply)

There's an article somewhere
claiming that at least one of the tribute pages is a covert EDL page that's been set up to get as many likes as possible.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Apparently the number of "likes" of the official EDL page has increased form 25K to 75K since this happened.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:54, Reply)

They have EDL branded balaclavas because they are sensible people with a political point to make and nothing to hide

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:55, Reply)

Fuck's sake.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 9:55, Reply)

I hope you get Woolwiched.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:45, Reply)

I'm with the Woolwich

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:47, Reply)

Lovely camping weather we're having.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:54, Reply)

Oooohhhhhhhhhhh Matron

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:55, Reply)

Hahaha
camping is excellent.

Don't forget to take a tarp to keep the rain off your cooking area.
( Kroney, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:04, Reply)

Meeting Chompy has been one of the highlights of my life so far.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 9:56, Reply)

no one can find your prostate quite like him eh?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:57, Reply)

He was gentle and considerate, it's true.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 9:58, Reply)

He buttfucked me like a grizzly

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Psychobummed.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 10:01, Reply)

The best kind

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:02, Reply)

Thank God
For a while there I thought I was the only person whose life has been so touched in that way.

Chompah U Akhbar!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Put it this way,
at the last bash I was at with him, if I'd just been out for a smoke and was coming back inside and spied Chompy going out for one, I'd immediately dash back outside just so I could suck in his second hand smoke.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Happy Birthday Chompers
I'm in the soft play with a coffee and a teacake. There are only about 5 kids here so nice and quiet
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:59, Reply)

Smug Git :(

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:01, Reply)

Teacakes are the new croissant

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:02, Reply)

I have a meeting this afternoon
Any how the cunt cancels I will go balastic, as I wanted the day off today
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:04, Reply)

I may have scrambled eggs and smoked salmon for lunch
I'm enjoying a rare day off
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:06, Reply)

P33D0 SCUM

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:05, Reply)

not even in my top ten Star Wars droids

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:07, Reply)

I tell you what, the best thing about my b3ta stag drinking session
was the site of Chompy with his flailing lizard tongue down Lampito's throat.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 24 May 2013, 9:59, Reply)

Lol at 'flailing lizard tongue'.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 10:01, Reply)

I saw Chompy at a bash, once.
He was so hammered I didn't think he'd manage to stay upright, there was a definite weave on, there. However, through a supreme effort of will, he not only stayed upright, but didn't vomit on me once.

A true hero.
( Kroney, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:06, Reply)

Sadly taken from us by some overzealous NHS manager,
probably a forrin an' all, by them blocking non-work related websites.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 24 May 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Like Lee 'Riggers' Rigby RIP lad

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:14, Reply)

Well HB CHO-CHO
BUT A NEW THREAD AWAITS
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:06, Reply)

I Like the way he dresses like a badger
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2329360/Pupils-panic-giant-badger-Animal-spotted-sniffing-classrooms-chasing-girls-grammar-school.html?ito=feeds-newsxml
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:08, Reply)

well......

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 24 May 2013, 10:18, Reply)