Right this is what my kid is getting for her birthday.
Big hardback book on Greek Mythology.
Several 70s kids TV DVDs (the Herbs, Magic Roundabout, Clangers etc)
A ninja suit and sword

Does this sound sufficient?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:05, 7 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

More than enough.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:05, Reply)

i have got mini ape nothing, so in comparison, yes.

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:05, Reply)

Don't forget the Femfresh.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:06, Reply)

Yes
If you buy too much it detracts from the value of the main present which I assume is the Ninja suit.
( Peej, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:06, Reply)

That's the thing she asked for.
Well, her first choice was 'a big motorbike - not a toy one Daddy, a real one'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:07, Reply)

ha love it!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:08, Reply)

If you loved her you would get her a GSX-R1000

( Peej, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)

My first proper bike was one of these
www.motorcyclespecs.co.za/Gallery%20%20A/Suzuki%20GSX%20750SD%20Katana%2084.jpg

Suits the ninja theme methinks.
( Peej, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:18, Reply)

i think you shold be3 careful of her using the hardback book as some sort of thrown ninja weapon.
those edges are dangerous
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:10, Reply)

Maybe I should gaffer tape some foam onto it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:12, Reply)

Or use PJ as a human shield

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)

nah, just tell her to only aim for fat people.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)

I'd throw in some home-made vouchers for activites.
You know, like 'One game of hide and seek', 'One board game of your choice', 'One picnic in the park', 'One packet of sweets before dinner', that sort of thing.

Bet you she'd love that, and wouldn't cost you anything. Plus, it would be all the sort of stuff you'd do with her anyway, but it would seem extra special because it would keep reminding her of her birthday every time she used one.

/gaaaaaaaaaay
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)

'packet of sweets before dinner'
^Scottish
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)

Kids being allowed sweets at any time of day is what's wrong with this country.
Well, that and all the darkies, obviously.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:17, Reply)

it was a bit awkward at our recruitment thing,
22 applicants, 3 darkies, and everyone got at least a trial shift except the darkies.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:19, Reply)

'Here you go, here's a tray of mints and some Blue Stratos, now go and sit in the bogs'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:19, Reply)

there is a lot more of that still going on than i thought.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:21, Reply)

I hate it so much I will leave a venue after one piss if they have them.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:22, Reply)

Piss on the mints.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:25, Reply)

+ wipe my arse on the bloke's hands

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:32, Reply)

That's what he does.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:34, Reply)

hahah at Tayyabs and Needoos they have jugs of water in the khazis
so the Muzzers can sluice their anuses.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:36, Reply)

A lot cleaner than toilet paper, I'm sure
I'm also sure no-one has EVER pissed in them whilst drunk
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:37, Reply)

Yates' in pompey used to have them on the weekend,
and they are a recognised national chain, why they thought it was ok i'll never know.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:28, Reply)

wow, that is a great idea, who did you steal it off?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)

It is a good idea actually

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:17, Reply)

It's a BLOODY good idea.
I'm incredibly creative, thankyouverymuch.

Everyone *loves* getting presents from me.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:18, Reply)

its my birthday next week,
i'll gaz you my address.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:19, Reply)

I'll send you a botdog.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:21, Reply)

i have no idea what that is, is it :) or :(

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:23, Reply)

It is my own invention:
A baguette with a shit in it, plus the usual hot dog trimmings.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:23, Reply)

Sauer Kraut?
No...but he will be when he eats it!
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:25, Reply)

oh HO!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:37, Reply)

i don't want one of those for my birthday,
why would b3th get me one of those? and surely a human poop would contravene some sort of royal mail guidelines, especially from a scottish poop.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)

It's a very unpleasant suggestion.
In fact, I would suggest you alert the mods to this bullying but obviously in this case you're going to have to right to the top and gaz 'Kunt'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:29, Reply)

Twin hammock presentlolz

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:20, Reply)

I like this

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:58, Reply)

Did next door's kid get bought a 'my first drug dealing' outfit or summat?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)

Yes.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 9 Jul 2013, 15:17, Reply)