Alt: burglary

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 10:59, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Really?
Share with the rest of the class please.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:00, Reply)

I was 17
I sold hashish for a chap much older than me, he wanted to make more money so I set up the purchase of 100 e's for him. The deal went bad and the money was nicked so this chap made me go up to Bromley with him on the train and I climbed in the (open) window of his bedsit to get what I could of his stuff, see if there were addresses/phone numbers etc.

Whilst I was filling a suitcase with all this chaps worldly possessions, his landlord unlocked the door and walked in, showing someone the room (the occupant had fled owing rent). I bluffed my way out of it, saying that the fellow had left me in his room and fucked off. He bought it and let me out the front door, with the suitcase.

My brother found out and went fucking nuts at the guy for making me do it. Upon reflection it was pretty out of order, I was only a kid. My life could have taken a seriously bad turn had I not blagged it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:08, Reply)

Fucking hell.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:09, Reply)

Decapitation's too good for him

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:11, Reply)

I haven't thought about that for years.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:13, Reply)

Caffartic here innit?

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:14, Reply)

If only you'd had a sword

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:11, Reply)

Or an ungentlemanly submarine.

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:15, Reply)

I've just thought of a really bad thing
My mate had his bedsit burgled and woke up halfway through it. Decided to stay still as the two of them seemed to have hammers but found that:

THEY NICKED HIS FUCKING CANS OUT OF THE FRIDGE!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:14, Reply)

My boss got burgled a few years ago whilst he was asleep & they even took items off his bedside cabinet.
He was lucky he didn't wake up, otherwise they'd probably (at best) have knocked him out.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:17, Reply)

But CANS

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:18, Reply)

Baked beans aint cheap either

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:19, Reply)

My mate was burgled
Idiots took the keyring from her car keys but left the car etc. But her house was such a shit heap that it took them weeks to notice the microwave was gone.
( Peej, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:19, Reply)

Ha ha

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:20, Reply)

WTF?
You would you nick a keyring?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:21, Reply)

He would he and all.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:25, Reply)

No idea. The whole thing was farcical
They got back from their holiday and didn't notice anything, then the next day they found that a pane of glass had been carefully removed from the side of the house and placed unbroken against the wall. THey couldn't find anything missing though. Then the next day her husband went to get a beer and found the beer had been nicked, then she went to get her car key and found the keyring was gone so they called the police and told the police they have a break in but that was all that was taken. Then weeks later they went to use the microwave and couldn't find it. They probably nicked loads that they never noticed because their house was fucking disgusting.
( Peej, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:27, Reply)

I may (or may not) have unwittingly been involved in a burglary as a child.
I was out playing with a mate, when I was about eight years old.
A van pulled up with his older brother and some mates in, they asked us to come and help with something, so in we jumped.
They drove us to a house and explained that it belonged to the parents of one of them, but they were away on holiday and he was locked out. They needed one of us, with our skinny arms, to reach through the letterbox and unlock the door. It turned out that my arms were thin enough and long enough to manage this.
In they went, they rewarded us with some biscuits and off we went to play again.
It was only years later when telling this story that someone pointed out to me that it probably wasn't their house.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:21, Reply)

HHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 4 Sep 2013, 11:23, Reply)