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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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well that shut you all up
what don't you give a shit about? apart from cricket.

alt: what rather sad or pointless thing do you secretly give a shit about? we all know battered loves a bit of Eurovision

altalt: what was the last thing you put in your mouth?
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:01, 138 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
altalt
Psychochomp's cheddary penis.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:02, Reply)
Excitement over 'games consoles' etc.
and how much money people have apart from myself.
Alt: Bowling figures.
Altalt: Electric 'Gay' Cigarette \o/
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:04, Reply)
33 more sleepies till chrisspopplemass!!!!!!!!

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:05, Reply)
But only 15 until hollipoppps!!!!!! 'WOOP WOOP!!!!'

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:06, Reply)
:( I am taking 0 days off over wintermass

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:07, Reply)
I only have 13 :(((((((
And I have to work from 10-2 for ONE day between Xmas and New Year.
And I have a long weekend in n Barcelona before Xmas :'('''''''''
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:09, Reply)
Har har
I'm off for about a week over Chrizzywizzles. Got to come in for the 27th, though :(
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:12, Reply)
I'm gonna burgle your house while your away

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:13, Reply)
my away what?
All I can think of is "kit", but I don't play sportball, so you're going to be empty handed.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:14, Reply)
I only have 2.5 days left until the end of the year :'(

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:14, Reply)
I have 19 which I'm getting paid for :((((

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:15, Reply)
do you never take time off or sutin?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:17, Reply)
Nope.
New job, new part of the business I'm managing, been here for 14 months and wanted to get things set up and running nicely before I start taking time off. Plus this year I'd rather have the money!
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:21, Reply)
that peshay record still ent turned up

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:22, Reply)
It has just turned up back here. Fucking wankers.
I'm going to the post office later, I will Royal Mail the fuck out of it this time.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:23, Reply)
I honestly couldn't give a crap about sport. It does not interest me at all.
I enjoy the spurious cricket chat on here sometimes, but only really for the linguistics.

Alt: bad cycling winds me up waaay more than it should. This is because I'm so fat, warm and comfortable I have nothing else in my life to feel offended by.

Altat: a sip of coffee.

Dear gods rereading this I conclude that I am perhaps the most boring person on the planet.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:18, Reply)
You think you have it bad
I get wound up and annoyed by extraordinarily petty things. Like, for example, people not wearing the correct evening wear. Why the fuck should I care if other people want to look like jumped up povvos in decent company? I don't know, but I do.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:20, Reply)
Well at least that's a legitimate complaint.
Cyclists are saving the planet, so we don't have any right to complain.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:38, Reply)
Is it, though?
It doesn't directly affect me if they either don't know or don't want to follow the dress code. It's pretty rude to the hosts, but that's between that person and the host.

As for cyclists, I think there ought to be the same sort of cursory investigation into cycling accidents as you get with two cars. Witnesses etc. Some of the time, the accident is the cyclist's fault. The car driver shouldn't be to blame when a cyclist comes out of their blind spot and throws themselves under their wheels.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:45, Reply)
Do you mean like your reluctance to wear fancy dress to a party that specifies it on the invitation?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:49, Reply)
That's because I feel ridiculous. I still do it, though.
It'd be rude not to.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:52, Reply)
This is at least the second post of the day that Vag has felt it necessary to explain his indifference to sport.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:34, Reply)
I'm just posting here to let you know that I am indifferent to this, and indeed all of your posts

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:37, Reply)
And I'm posting again to point out that, of the two of us, you are more likely to be upset than me.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:38, Reply)
What? No it isn't.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:39, Reply)
Oh yeah, I meant to say Football.
The shittest sport ever, for yobs, thickos, scum and commoners to chant and jeer at whilst watching a ball being kicked for 90 minutes.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:33, Reply)
Most things, really.
Alt: I am often capable of working myself up into an apoplectic rage about the behaviour of other road users. I wish I wasn't.

Altalt: Tea
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:34, Reply)
Yeah, when they keep papping you as you drive along at 30mph in the middle lane of the motorway
Must really get on your nerves
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:59, Reply)
I like it when people driving along in the middle lane for no discernable reason
get annoyed at you for undertaking them.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:00, Reply)
^^^

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:00, Reply)
I like it when they get cross and make hand gestures.
I give them a little wave.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:03, Reply)
On the rare occasions that I can contain my fury, I like to make overly friendly gestures to idiotic drivers, smiles, waves, thumbs-up and the like

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:04, Reply)
One thing that makes me properly cross
is when I'm overtaking somebody, already whilst speeding, and some jerk speeds up behind me and hangs onto my bumper. Some douchebag did that to me last night, I was doing 65 in a 50. So I kettled him for a mile and a half.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:07, Reply)
There's no finer revenge than a petty one.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:08, Reply)
He did the obvious staring when I let him past.
It was beautiful, he was puce. I smiled and gave him the finger.

I was smug about that all evening. I'm a terrible person.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:10, Reply)
Mrs tangle is never impressed by this sort of anecdote
She's an idiot.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:21, Reply)
This is why they shouldn't be allowed to drive.
Without women, the roads would be a constant Mad Max style battlefield. It'd be awesome.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:23, Reply)
I like it when people drive with due care and consideration for all road users
Even *dare I say it* cyclists
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:44, Reply)
That's just bullshit.
Cyclists are worth points. As are the elderly, though they're worth fewer points due to being a slower-moving target.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:46, Reply)
I have a loathing of drivers who wear hats they generally fall into two
Categories
The geriatric buffoon, who seems to think they are the only ones on the road.
The boy racer, enough said on that one really

Anyway I'm about due for my meeting so Fuck you lot
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:53, Reply)
I think you've got me mixed up with Lokesy here

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:00, Reply)
probably because you drive like a bent oid lady and everyone has to overtake you

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:59, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post2150974
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:01, Reply)
YM.
Alt YM.
Altalt YM.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 10:35, Reply)
poor people
Alt: keeping my pants and sock drawer tidy

Altalt: air
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:01, Reply)
Most things, to be honest
Alt:
Football, cricket

AltAlt:
Beechams Flu Plus
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:16, Reply)
I JUST DROVE A FUCKING CAR, BITCHES
STAND BACK...I AM A MOTORIST!!!
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:17, Reply)
Aren't you usually?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:18, Reply)
Nope, never learned
Thought it was about time.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:20, Reply)
Well good work and congratulations on adding to the number of people that get in my way
every time I want to get anywhere. Cheers. No, really. Thanks.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:21, Reply)
I solemnly swear to never get in anyone's way ever
amen
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Be sure to quickly forget everything the instructor taught you.
It's a warzone out there and your only weapon is ruthlessness.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:25, Reply)
I already have
I'm planning on drinking heavily before my next lesson. Dutch courage and all that.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Celebrities, and reality TV (except X Factor, which I love, in a post-ironic sort of way, I'm not a pleb, honestly, please don't judge me, I'll be your best friend...)
Alt: Dr Who. I'm stupidly excited about this weekend.

AltAlt: chelsea bun. It was ver' nice.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:18, Reply)
*judges*

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:19, Reply)
Yeah, thanks, hippy.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:39, Reply)
A facebook 'friend' keeps posting Dr Who stuff like an over excited child, and no matter how insulting I am he REFUSES to delete me.
I don't know what to do anymore :(
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:23, Reply)
Post child porn all over his 'timeline'
You know, from your extensive collection.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:24, Reply)
It was all seized.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:27, Reply)
Shouldn't have taken it to PC World.
Will people never learn?
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:40, Reply)
Tell him that Dr Who ripped off the whole 'time travelling phone box thing' from Bill & Ted
Which was way better.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:27, Reply)
HA HA!
I will.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:28, Reply)
Why did you add DG on facebook?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:47, Reply)
Where the fuck is Monty Anyway?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:24, Reply)
DEAD

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:26, Reply)

Stop all the clocks, cut off the Internet,
Prevent GeordieJay from playing with a juicy bone,
Silence the paedos and with muffled rape victims
Bring out the coffin, let the beekers come.

I was going to do the whole poem but I got bored sorry. just make up the rest and include blah blah swipey sucked chompys cock, swipey is ginger, swipey is northen, swipey is fat, blah blah blah
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:43, Reply)
Sitting on the sidelines, crying like a girl

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:26, Reply)
Tears gently rolling down his face, forming the shape of the SS 'runic' lightening emblem.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:30, Reply)
I know who the Lionel Richie bust really is

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:32, Reply)
Who?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:32, Reply)
Not telling
I took a photo of it for prosperity
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:33, Reply)
I have seen it IRL

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:34, Reply)
How do you think I managed to take a photo of it

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:37, Reply)
Did you see it with 'the hat' on?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:37, Reply)
Unfortunately the photo predates the purchase of the hat.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:38, Reply)
It looks better with the hat. It completes it.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:40, Reply)
Is there anyone here who hasn't been lured back to Monty's flat?

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:40, Reply)
o/

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:41, Reply)
Well, no, you would have to leave your house for that to happen.

(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:41, Reply)
When I awoke in the morning he was gone
and that was the last time I ever saw him Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:44, Reply)
Are people not replying to The Doveston because they don't want him to post a picture of his balls?
That's gay.
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 11:58, Reply)

NEW SHIT THREAD
(, Thu 21 Nov 2013, 12:01, Reply)

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