Dead innit.
Worrying news here: www.bournemouthecho.co.uk/news/10903747.Steak_and_kidney_pie__destroyed__in_cooking_fire/

What's big news in your area?
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 17:01, 111 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Taxis
www.yorkpress.co.uk/features/readersletters/10902786.A_traffic_system__Oh_no__it_isn___t___/?ref=mr
(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 17:09, Reply)

Renault clio shocker
www.folkestoneherald.co.uk/BREAKING-Car-crash-A2070/story-20375547-detail/story.html
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 17:16, Reply)

MM, obviously.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 17:24, Reply)

Not a great deal that's not almost as depressing
as a plumdozer Gaz
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 17:37, Reply)

He's more needy than a famine victim.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:39, Reply)

a famine Chompy is of a female
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:41, Reply)

this on its own is something of an asahi sentence

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:22, Reply)

Poundstretcher robbed.
www.bristolpost.co.uk/Poundstretcher-Kingswood-robbed-cash/story-20379875-detail/story.html
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 17:39, Reply)

I once needed some shoe laces in a hurry and was told to try one of them pound places
that was in a retail park less than half a mile from where I worked, to my surprise I saw somebody shoplifting in there...Shoplifting from Poundland WTF?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 17:42, Reply)

It was you wasn't it?

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:21, Reply)

Nahhh some Romanian types, all huddled round the stationary bit
I've been pilfering my pens and pencils from work for ages in fact I used to order from this company www.lyreco.com/webshop/P03/welcome?lc=ENEN anything that I needed for work or home*

*please take into note that I did often use to work from home and all items were used for work purposes

The laces however were shit, so poundplace in fact stole from me ONE WHOLE QUID.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:31, Reply)

Smackhead dies in smacktown
Shocker
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:23, Reply)

Being dead in Keighley puts you at a distinct advantage over the other inhabitants, I'd say
This is another lovely Chavford headline:-

www.thetelegraphandargus.co.uk/news/10902370.Mum_puts_her_baby_up_for_sale_on_website_for___150_000/?ref=mr
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:39, Reply)

City of dreams

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:47, Reply)

I dream that I don't have to live here any more...

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:48, Reply)

Do you dare to dream that?
Have a bit of this then...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6oq1MW0QJU
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:51, Reply)

Harters - I like you, but will you NOT keep doing shite links, eh?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 18:58, Reply)

Hahaha
Did you get over the Pasadenas earworm I sent you last week?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:01, Reply)

I did
But I didn't know that Cecil Womack had died this year - had the radio on the other day and this came on:-

www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8AOAap6_k4

Which is of the same era.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:05, Reply)

Tear drops ain't a quite as dated as dare to dream
Still Bobby and Linda are still alive
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:11, Reply)

I see the Pasadenas and Womack and Womack as two parts of an inglorious triumverate
I'll let you ponder the third wonky leg while I go for a tab.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:14, Reply)

Wow to many of that era to think about
I would like to think that the Gibb brothers we're the real power behind the throne
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:20, Reply)

Yep they probably usurped Cameo

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:22, Reply)

Good old Larry and his codpiece

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:27, Reply)

They were as good as your syntax and punctuation is poor
Late 80's clubbing. Dancing and grooving. Footsteps has actually stood the test of time but this was always the one:-

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UtKADQnjQmc
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:26, Reply)

Well if your going to rude.........

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:29, Reply)

I don't have time to be rude any more.

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:30, Reply)

*sniffs* It seems you're doing a pretty good job of it

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:32, Reply)

Well, look - the last few posts from you have hardly shone, have they?
It's time to buck your standards up, my man. This is not a place for slipshod grammar.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:36, Reply)

*scowls*

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:39, Reply)

And it's "Sorry Sir" when you scowl insolently at me
Now - link another late 80's banger or you'll be in big trouble.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:42, Reply)

And stop gazing at your shoes, Hare.

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:43, Reply)

My Bloody Valentine, Soon

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:49, Reply)

Well you asked for it
www.youtube.com/watch?v=t2UZ7BGRkE4

This is the era my record collection is from
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:49, Reply)

Yes I did
Forgetting that you're a soul boy.

I'm afraid I can't relate to that stuff at all.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:53, Reply)

More funk than soul really
I can't help but think you would have liked the Roy Ayers gig I went to last Sunday
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:59, Reply)

alright bogus official

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 19:05, Reply)

Over this side now Harters
Don't know any Roy Ayers.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:03, Reply)

Yes you do

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:04, Reply)

Tell me which bits I do.
I'll tell you which bits of Low you don't think you know but do.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:07, Reply)

One of the most sampled artists
If you lived during the 80's and 90's you must have listened to a few tracks or samples of his
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:14, Reply)

Really don't know any Roy Ayers
You're making me feel like a Galaxy 105 listener here - I know my music.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:20, Reply)

You could try to google him
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roy_Ayers
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:24, Reply)

I could have done that
Music is like history - you're never going to know it all so you stick to the bits you relate to.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:29, Reply)

Cubts being cunts
People standing too close to me, also cunts.
A load of shit that needs to get fucked.
I need to get drunk but I'll get even more fucking shit if I do. Fuck fuck and then again fuck. Ah, fuckit.
(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:03, Reply)

This is how I feel at most Wedding Present gigs these days

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:06, Reply)

Good old 'happy bear', really lighting up the room with his positive attitude, charm and charisma.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:24, Reply)

I don't think he's very sober, frog man
It's going to be a whitewash, isn't it?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:30, Reply)

Yes, I don't think the team have anything left to even bother in the final test, it will be a proper walkover.
As usual they will bring a couple of bowling changes in, instead of the batsmen which have been the problem.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:33, Reply)

There's something badly wrong
Swann wouldn't have walked out otherwise.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:35, Reply)

He has been declining a bit recently though, but obviously he'd had enough.
It's the lack of runs that have been the downfall, the bowlers haven't ever had a score to work with.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:37, Reply)

What next though?
Captain? Other than Bell and I doubt he'd do it who has the stance and presence to replace Cook?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:40, Reply)

I think cook will be a good captain in time, the team hasn't got enough grafters to grind out some runs since trott went home.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:43, Reply)

I don't think he will, now
If you want a captain now - bookmark this - its Bresnan.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:47, Reply)

Really?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:48, Reply)

Yes
He's got the intelligence, the attitude and the authority to do it.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:51, Reply)

I wouldn't have even considered him.
I'd go with Prior if he was getting runs, he's the only one with enough experience bar Bell, and Pietersen, and we know what happened there. Bowling captains never seem to sit right with me.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:54, Reply)

I'm not saying tomorrow and I know what you're saying about bowling captains
Next shout will be Bell who can't do it, Prior could but he's not got much left in him.

Or you do it daft and give it to Root. How old was Lillee when the convicts made him Boss man?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:00, Reply)

I don't reckon bell would be any good either, but they will probably would go with him next. They will stick with cook though
A 'young' captain might be good, but there isn't really anyone who has cemented their place in the team.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:05, Reply)

Bresnan

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:05, Reply)

I think because they rely on his batting a bit too, it may be a big ask of him.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:08, Reply)

Who else then?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:22, Reply)

I'm at a loss

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:25, Reply)

Another few years at the arse end, I reckon
Takes the expectations off and makes you not feel too bad when you loose to Bangladesh.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:29, Reply)

Well, it's been a wild ride seeing England be good for a change, but normal service must resume eventually.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:31, Reply)

I've been doing this since 1985 - first test I went to
Love it or hate it, it's infectious and other than US History I've no bigger obsession.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:35, Reply)

Agreed.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:37, Reply)

Allo Froggo.
Dunno why we have to do this 'grinding out'
Talented batsmen like Carberry and Root at the crease for 60 balls and three runs is unnatural and hasn't worked once in the series. Pietersen at the other end being a egotistical twat is out for 3 in 3 balls.
Fuckin bat like good batsmen, get in, score, then stay in.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:54, Reply)

Depends on the situation though ed, needs a reliable batter like trott and collingwood for when someone needs to get stuck in and steady an innings.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:57, Reply)

I know but your top order should all be capable of getting stuck in.
I think the Oz taught them you have to have character as well as skill.
They did look scared out there.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:02, Reply)

They were terrified
You mentioned Collingwood and maybe that's what we need - someone who can play but doesn't do the KP stunt shots.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:04, Reply)

KP's occasional brilliance does not outweigh his poor shots getting out for next to nothing enough to warrant a place in the team IMO.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:10, Reply)

Don't forget most of these guys won the ashes very recently.
I think the Oz did a Fergie brain mess job on them and once under their skin, stayed there.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:12, Reply)

It wasn't what you'd call a convincing win though
You're probably right in that complacency has been a major element in this shambles.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:20, Reply)

Unfair on the rest of the team to walk & not complete the series, no matter how bad the team are performing.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:40, Reply)

That's why I say there's something wrong
He was still - on stats - the 3rd best spinner in the world.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:43, Reply)

He wasn't doing a lot though, fuck all wickets. Seems to have jumped before being pushed I reckon.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:44, Reply)

Pushed for who though?
Monty?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:49, Reply)

They were the rumours apparently. Being a Kent fan I'd give Tredwell a chance before Monty.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:51, Reply)

He's over there now
Lets see. He's not bad.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:53, Reply)

Biased, but he's been easily in the top 3 county spinners for years now.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:55, Reply)

CRICKET CAN FUCK OFF AS WELL WITH YOUR DUCKS AND FUCKING GOOGLIES
Useless fucking stump cunts and their boring cunting followers. At least there've been a few decent films about baseball. The only decent film about cricket would be a documentary about mincing everyone that plays cricket, everyone that watches cricket, everyone that talks about cricket and Jiminy fucking Cricket into a big fucking pie that gets eaten by the homeless and shat back out again onto David fucking Camerons face. You cunts.
(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:24, Reply)

That's us told then, eh?

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:25, Reply)

Calm down dear.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:26, Reply)

EAT A SPIKY DICK CUNTSTICKS

(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:28, Reply)

Steady on with the cuss words fella, children read this forum.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:26, Reply)

Terrible bullying of Battered

(Xav loves PhillieJoe, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:27, Reply)

He might be child size, but he's actually, like, nearly 50 or saink.
TRUFAX
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:28, Reply)

You've hit us for six with that one Beararse

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:29, Reply)

alright

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 20:41, Reply)

young lad disappeared in Manchester over Xmas and they found a body today
poor sod was only 17 :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:16, Reply)

You should have left him alone.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:17, Reply)

+ after the first time

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:46, Reply)

I have clicked 'I like this!'.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 22:04, Reply)

Maybe you should just Gaz Swipe instead and ask her outright?
She does fall a bit easy for B3tans
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 22:24, Reply)

Dude, I've already got a chunky redhead right here at home, Imma all about gazzing up Cavey.
She puts out AND forgives you for ditching her before significant days.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 22:55, Reply)

Well played
not really much I could to add to that one
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 23:12, Reply)

CRICKET CHAT ONLY

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:17, Reply)

he committed suicide by train
He was bored with CRICKET CHAT and could take it no longer.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:18, Reply)

Sorry if you were bored with CRICKET CHAT
Perhaps you could add to the thread by simply replying 'alright' ,which everyone will be drawn to and reply to you in droves.



Oh.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:21, Reply)

perhaps...
Deez nutz.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:22, Reply)

Is that Dre?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:25, Reply)

Fuck, you lot still here

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:35, Reply)

No, going now xx

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:36, Reply)

Yeah, fuck off
Nobody likes you anyway
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:38, Reply)

Off to bed just right now

( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:38, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2176257
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:41, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2176258
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:57, Reply)

18, with the looks of a 40 year old
www.ipswichstar.co.uk/news/ipswich_stowmarket_courageous_daughter_reveals_how_sex_abuser_father_ruined_her_life_1_3159213
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 21:42, Reply)

would.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 22:08, Reply)

He ain't on about the first Pic.
Now just put it away please
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 30 Dec 2013, 22:22, Reply)