Train thread, best of all the threads!
Home sweet home, pull up a kittum and have some nummy caykes!

Alt: best Blue peter presenter

Altalt: where would you like to touch me?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:25, 113 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

lets go train thread lets go *clap clap*

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:26, Reply)

Choo choo!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:39, Reply)

someone sat next to me :'(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:40, Reply)

Oh I always to have that
Plenty standing as well, chumps
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:46, Reply)

I try to sneak a look at their tickets to see if they get off before me.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:48, Reply)

Winch is the first stop innit

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:53, Reply)

how longs your journey?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:55, Reply)

1 hour on the train
1:30 or so total
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:02, Reply)

that takes longer than mine

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:06, Reply)

Woe is me :(

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:11, Reply)

ha! see? there are downsides to having a better career and more successful home life than me!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:15, Reply)

I'm sure you are very important and successful frogger

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:19, Reply)

I was :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:21, Reply)

Didn't the company go under or summit? Couldn't you get a similar position elsewhere?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:22, Reply)

I thought that was HH?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:23, Reply)

Yeah...shit it the fan for poor old frogger as well I think, prior to his residency here

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:24, Reply)

he's a big deal in central heating

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:25, Reply)

which is why he's dating a boiler

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:26, Reply)

yes and no. not enough vacancies about. might do something different soonish perhaps.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:25, Reply)

trains are shit
alt: Janet Ellis, bet she's well dirty
altalt:in the back, hard enough to go over a cliff
(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:27, Reply)

She used to live near me, we'd chat in the coffee shop

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:38, Reply)

i don't even like cake
but right now, I could really go for a piece of cake. preferably lemon drizzle, but failing that, a nice superlight sponge or madeira, topped with lots of icing.

alt: no idea, never watched it.

altalt: there. oh yeah, gary.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:28, Reply)

What is it with woman an anal?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:39, Reply)

lemon drizzle is Snoop Dogg's favourite cake

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:44, Reply)

i thought that was why he carried an umbrella
fo' drizzle?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 17:49, Reply)

NO.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:13, Reply)

he used to be a carpenter
he was quite handy with a chizzle
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:16, Reply)

he came to jeffstock
in Brizzle
(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:18, Reply)

I'm always touched by your presence dear.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:00, Reply)

Itboh after all

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:02, Reply)

I'LL JUST EAT NOMMY CAYKE BY MYSELF

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:12, Reply)

Can we snugglewuggle?
Alt: Tim "the nutkins" Davidson

Altalt: I'd like to stroke your hair
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:12, Reply)

You would be welcome to, it's as soft as an eider ducks arse
Good day annoying office types?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:14, Reply)

Yeah.
I was working in an office that does admin and stuff for sheltered housing. Thick. Really thick. I mean just depressingly stupid. At least someone sensible seems to have them on minimum wage and managed to get them to sign contracts where they aren't reimbursed for milage on work visits.

I know I'm not smart, if anyone wanted to point that out, but this lot took it to a level where even Jason would be head of the quiz team.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:17, Reply)

Public sector innit, thick jobsworths

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:20, Reply)

and lazy wikijockeys convinced of their own intellectual superiority yet eking out a life of penury in rented accomodation.
While single.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:22, Reply)

The more time I spend around the public sector,
The more I hate them. I've got a long week at Birmingham City council soon. That'll be shit.

How's tricks your end?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:27, Reply)

Jason heads up the ppi investigation team

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:20, Reply)

poo pipe internal...

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:22, Reply)

he's GeordieJay: inspector

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:23, Reply)

Pop penises inside

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:23, Reply)

pootube protection insurance

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:24, Reply)

You boys are weird obsessives.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:41, Reply)

let's go round again

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:24, Reply)

Alright Francois?
How's IT support today?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:25, Reply)

that's drimble

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:26, Reply)

You know there's not just 1 job per sector right?
I mean, imagine if swipe was the only lawyer?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:28, Reply)

what are you talking about?
User 84237 is drimble. You have misunderstood my post.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:29, Reply)

'that's drimble' = 'that user is drimble'
I assume you understand basic sentence construction and use of pronouns?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:31, Reply)

Oh I thought you meant the person in IT was drimble,
No need to get all up on your cunt horse.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:32, Reply)

what, like you did?
No, no need at all.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:32, Reply)

NO YOU DID!

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:33, Reply)

you did it first!
I was just trying to help out mi nigga de nyaked ape.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:35, Reply)

Fair.
How's life in York?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:36, Reply)

expensive, tourist infested and students keep drowning
Also a dead expensive development on the river gonna get sold to London people.

Locals are upset, maybe they should earn more.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:39, Reply)

Who drowned?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:42, Reply)

a girl in January, they only just recovered the body
Some other kid vanished near the other river. Presumed drowned.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:44, Reply)

is that the one who was seen on cctv at one end of the bridge and then never seen again?
or was that somewhere else?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:46, Reply)

yeah that's her
Her body's been found.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:48, Reply)

Her mates were a bit shit mind. How pissed were they to lose someone from one end of a bridge to the other.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:49, Reply)

because she went home and they were all prodigiously pissed

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:54, Reply)

Probably she jumped at their encouragement,
As a silly student prank, and now they've all got some pact to keep it a secret, then one will get scared and tell another one they're going to confess leading to a bunch of bizarre murders in a hall of residence as the only sober one who secretly killed her on purpose tries to silence them all in case the truth comes out

Or you know. Booze.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:54, Reply)

booze
And the Ouse is fucking lethal.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:57, Reply)

Ouse is a stupid name for a river.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:00, Reply)

no doubt it is of ancient origin

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:07, Reply)

flucken counts not knowing about 84237 innit mein brüder

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:32, Reply)

yer
Some niggaz wud fink dat dere ent no knowledge of drimblepops and his notoriety in the non IT sector.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:34, Reply)

dey dont no about his kru
Dey dont no wot he do
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:51, Reply)

he fingers disabled kids

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:52, Reply)

well yeah but other people didn't know that

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:54, Reply)

shit.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:58, Reply)

dunno who that is and I don't work in IT
but thank you for your interest
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:28, Reply)

I get a lift home, thanks.
alt. John Leslie
Altalt. On the dolly's no-no parts to show the policeman
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:41, Reply)

get bent

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:42, Reply)

woah, too late

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:42, Reply)

you have sex with men

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:45, Reply)

no... wait.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:45, Reply)

you look like a potato with special educational needs

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:46, Reply)

You look like a pointy, novelty key hanger, bo jangles face.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:50, Reply)

yeah, in a picture where I'm pulling a face on purpose, well done

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:51, Reply)

Didn't need to try too hard did you?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:52, Reply)

what, to emphasise my great cheekbones?
No. No, I didn't.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:53, Reply)

How can you tell through camo pants?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:58, Reply)

yes, I wear trousers over my face
Idiot.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:59, Reply)

u iz both well hideous but in differing ways hth

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:53, Reply)

Not me though.
I'm handsome, like you.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:55, Reply)

goes without saying piggers

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:00, Reply)

I was even once compared to the almighty Monty, late of this parish.
R. I. P
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:02, Reply)

swipe said I looked like him in an old pic where I was resplendent in hair and beard
I would say that is very unfair on that handsome homeless devil though
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:04, Reply)

He was the most handsome wasn't he.
Maybe one day he will return.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:06, Reply)

im quite lucky that I see him sometimes, hes great fun.
Are you coming to Bristol?
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:09, Reply)

Don't think so,
But I am looking at a London jaunt soon.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:11, Reply)

I will buy you one (1) pint if im about

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:13, Reply)

Deal.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:20, Reply)

B3ta isn't known for churning out models really, Im up there with the best, however.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 18:58, Reply)

Ha, Bollocks, I hear you're a fat cunt.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:00, Reply)

IT'S HOLIDAY WEIGHT!!!
You boys are mean and Im TELLING!!
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:01, Reply)

I've never seen you. You might be a looker.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:03, Reply)

how many holidays have you had?

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:04, Reply)

Don't you be throwing shade at me!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:06, Reply)

no, you look like a potato someone has drawn a mong face on

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:00, Reply)

Alt: helen skelton
Altalt: in my mum's kitchen
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:06, Reply)

I'll kitchen your mum's Skelton if you know what I Helen.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:12, Reply)

haha yes I sort of do!
Alright?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:13, Reply)

I'm tops.
Got engaged innit. All domestic and shit.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:19, Reply)

ooh get you!
Well congratulations! Can I come to the recepsh?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:22, Reply)

Totes.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:24, Reply)

Probably get some of the good ones from the super secret board to the stag as well.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:24, Reply)

alt: richard nyommy baconz because he took drugs and got fired

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:14, Reply)

Alt: Konnie Huq.
WOULD.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:24, Reply)

Alt: Konnie Huq

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:27, Reply)

Thought you'd prefer Shep.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:31, Reply)

Yeah, well I heard you wanted to 'Go with Noakes'.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Mar 2014, 19:52, Reply)