Year to date
What has been your biggest acheivement of the year? Biggest failure?

Alt:
Best/worst party
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:12, 99 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I love a party with a happy atmosphere.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:13, Reply)

I was Abott to say that

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:14, Reply)

always rustling around for a pun

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:15, Reply)

Its a mad house here

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:16, Reply)

His jumper makes the video
www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFPLk5mJ1D4
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:17, Reply)

I cannot unsee this

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:25, Reply)

I have literally achieved nothing this year and have failed in the job and family department
Alt. Best Alex Party. Worst S-Club Party
( Peej, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:23, Reply)

Well done

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:24, Reply)

Thank you

( Peej, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:31, Reply)

Getting on the popular page of off topic.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:30, Reply)

\o/

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:33, Reply)

Got on a bike for the first time in 10 years - Success
Fell off it 8/9 miles later - Failure.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:32, Reply)

How is the arm?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:33, Reply)

Bit sore today, but recovering well, thanks
Bruise has come out quite well
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:50, Reply)

nice

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:53, Reply)

Ouch.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:54, Reply)

Aye, stings a bit
Just glad to finally have properly visible damage, tbh
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:55, Reply)

So were you in the middle of nowhere with a broken arm then?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:56, Reply)

Not quite middle of nowhere, thankfully

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:11, Reply)

It's no "foot bruise"
but I'll allow it.

imgur.com/9GlxGRP
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:09, Reply)

Oof, that is impressive!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:59, Reply)

Decorating my living room / dining room myself. Looks fucking brilliant.
Alt: Bukkake party at YM's house.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 13 May 2014, 10:35, Reply)

I'm really pleased with all the work I've done on our house
as someone who doesn't do DIY
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:42, Reply)

If you work on your own home
what do the Polish in your area do?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:45, Reply)

We dont allow the Polish into Whitley Bay

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:45, Reply)

That explains why it looks so dull

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:46, Reply)

I purposely added a "the" into that

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:48, Reply)

From the sounds of it your DIY skils exceeds mine.
Although I'm fairly nifty at decorating - but I wouldn't like to pay me by the hour.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 13 May 2014, 10:46, Reply)

I'm genuinely gobsmacked at how much I've done
Boxing in the stairs was the most difficult one but its turned out really well
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:49, Reply)

Long as you had the higher step and superior reach you should have won easily.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:52, Reply)

I told Mrs Cow that before we started
Does she listen? Does she fuck
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:54, Reply)

I told Mrs Cow that before we started
Does she listen?

Yes. She does. In fact she's due round at 3pm.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:04, Reply)

Good luck with that

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:04, Reply)

Not getting YM pregnant.
TBF she has only been swallowing my manphat.

Alt: EDL.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:37, Reply)

The EDL are lightweights.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:38, Reply)

Thank you, Oswald Moseley.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:41, Reply)

#jewsout

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:46, Reply)

#laycablestreet

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:47, Reply)

I think at 70 you might have a touch of difficulty

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:44, Reply)

She is still really juicy.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:45, Reply)

I'll pass on your lovely comments to her

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:46, Reply)

Are you going to my dungeon then?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:47, Reply)

Ain't no party like a dungeon party

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:49, Reply)

biggest achievement: getting someone to like the shitcom script or my very glowing work appraisal
biggest failure: utter spectacular failure to progress the new kitchen, curtains, carpets, sofas.

alt: ain't no party like an s-club party
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:50, Reply)

Don't forget discovering that you're magnetic!!!!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:52, Reply)

oh yes, that was a really special moment
"look, the metal sticks to that kid because he's so fat and sweaty."

5 mins later:

"oooh look, it sticks to you."

THIS IS WHY YOU DON'T DESERVE NICE THINGS.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:53, Reply)

however, it has just reminded me.....

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:54, Reply)

I'm trying the iron tonight.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:55, Reply)

Omen II

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:57, Reply)

pfffft, you don't even know where the iron is

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:59, Reply)

Neither does your cleaner

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:00, Reply)

Rache Sucks cock well.
Goal for the year: Suck more cock.

Great appraisal.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:53, Reply)

it's like you were in the room

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:54, Reply)

I had my input.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:55, Reply)

Did you also provide a solution?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:57, Reply)

I suggested that she suck more cock.
Problem solved.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:58, Reply)

Well it saves you getting off on the wrong foot

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:00, Reply)

yes
it was more salty than alkaline
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:58, Reply)

Biggest achievement: exhibiting my photographic work

Biggest failure: getting YM to stop pestering me for sex.

Alt: best party: the one where I met Mrs Vagabond.

Worst: that one where I ended up staring into a mirror over the toilet with my cock in my hand for 10 minutes, while passers-by openly pointed and laughed at me.

Altalt: Apex Twin, Didgeridoo.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:53, Reply)

here is MEATSNAKE'S biggest failure of the year
"can identical twins be male/female?"

REALLY? IN WHAT WAY COULD THEY BE IDENTICAL??????????
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:55, Reply)

Hahahaha. What a tool.
They are fraternal if boy girl twins?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:57, Reply)

yes indeed, as opposed to monozygotic twins, which are identical
even triplets, you can have one pair of identical twins, and one loser. but that pair of identical twins ain't going to be boy/girl!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:58, Reply)

I would say the twins are the losers.
Freaky looking fucks.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:59, Reply)

this^
There's no win in twins. Unless they are going at it on you hammer and tongs
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:00, Reply)

i did once say, "just because they're identical twins, it doesn't mean they look the same," and got ridiculed
but i maintain that my point was a good one: hairstyle, clothes, tatts etc.

what's freaky is when you see a story about twins who were separated at birth, but when they find one another, they are wearing virtually the same clothes and have the same haircut. NATURE'S CLONES.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:02, Reply)

Twins are freaky full stop

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:04, Reply)

it would be great for shopping
you could see what you really look like in your new clothes
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:06, Reply)

OR UNLESS YOU NEED A KIDNEY
bound to be a pretty good match
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:02, Reply)

^ this.
Heir and a spare.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:07, Reply)

RACHELSWIPE GAVE ME A FORK TO EAT A YOGHURT LIKE THAT WAS NORMAL

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:57, Reply)

it is perfectly normal
who wants a giant spoon in their mouth, taking up all the room, and making them heave?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 10:58, Reply)

GO FORK YOURSELF

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:00, Reply)

?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:00, Reply)

i don't like spoons, unless it's for soup, when i accept it's a necessary evil
they shovel it all in there, and you get no choice. whereas with a fork, you can take it delicately from the prongs.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:01, Reply)

Yoghurt is fucking runny you mong!
Eat it with a spoon
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:02, Reply)

She looked at me like *I* was the idiot for being surprised at the delivery of a fork

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:05, Reply)

or uc
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:09, Reply)

You are a fucking idiot
/ac
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 13 May 2014, 11:06, Reply)

spoon cock
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:01, Reply)

YM?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:06, Reply)

Of course
she gets paid by the inch
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:07, Reply)

You are a fucking idiot.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:02, Reply)

Congratulations. You have now reached international-level fucktard foodwrong.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 13 May 2014, 11:13, Reply)

officelol

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:16, Reply)

Weapons-grade foodwrong.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:16, Reply)

I actually wrote 'weapons-grade' initially and then changed it.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 13 May 2014, 11:18, Reply)

^ froths like battered ^
i wish i could get that fucking song out of my head
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:31, Reply)

click

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 13 May 2014, 11:18, Reply)