If your "fanny" has "baws"
then you are definitely doing it wrong.

PS Has your house got a sea view?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:35, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

no :(
it has views of 'other houses' front and rear
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:36, Reply)

What if you built a big tower on the roof?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:37, Reply)

If I had another two storeys I probably would have a sea view, assuming the neighbours didn't have the same idea

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:38, Reply)

If we fit out the loft we'd have a sea view

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:40, Reply)

Nice view of the North Sea. Very bracing.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:41, Reply)

The coast at ours is superb
Nice bay with a lighthouse at one end the the Spanish City dome at the other
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:45, Reply)

It really is
I was pleasantly surprised.

From Tynemouth up there's about 40 miles of mostly empty beaches.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:47, Reply)

+ because it's fucking freezing

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:49, Reply)

Not in august/early Sept

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:52, Reply)

Just because you are used to the warmth coming off those incendiary bombs

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 13:04, Reply)

I've been diving up your way.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:51, Reply)

^bog snorkeler

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:52, Reply)

You don't need 2 stories,
Just a load of scaffolding and a ladder and then put a chair up there and call it an extra reception room. In fact, if you piss off the top you could call it en suite
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:42, Reply)

^I like this.
In a gun turret stylee.

I could be like that bloke out of Turrican.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:39, Reply)

a 'mental' was walking past the other day muttering to himself and pointing to locations he would place machine gun turrets in the road outside work

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:41, Reply)

I'd never get planning permission.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:42, Reply)

Did he get it right?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:42, Reply)

no, he was placing them on the inside of the curve in the road, rather than the outside, allowing enemies to advance closer before they became visible to those manning the gun placements
wot a knob
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:44, Reply)

sheesh, the younger generation, no idea
should be reading "the art of war" as a set text at school instead of all that bloobloo war poetry.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:46, Reply)

that poetry is very negative about war, enough to put a lesser man off learning and deploying military tactics, no wonder youth are such pussys

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:48, Reply)

darn right
should be Shin Tzu and Alfred Mahan, with a side of Churchill and Alexander.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:50, Reply)

wot no Clausewitz?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 13:05, Reply)

Sun tsu was famous for his excellent machine gun tactics

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:48, Reply)

general principles of war apply no matter what the weapons
I would bet there are many copies at Sandhurst.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:51, Reply)

There are also many copies the readers wives with your mum in

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:56, Reply)

the special fold out issue is the best

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:58, Reply)

I read this as "fold tissue"
:(
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 13:04, Reply)

^no respect for senior management^

( Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:42, Reply)