Home Sweaty Home


Read it and weep. Or laugh. Or have no reaction whatsoever.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 7:38, 114 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

howdy light!
how goes it?
I am well.
I wrote a reply for the QOTW. I'll just pimp it now. I don't think it's brilliant but hey! I haven't made up anything awesome in a while. ;)

Whatcha doing?
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:00, Reply)

*tumbleweeds*

Never been in this early...then again I'v enever been in work this early.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:10, Reply)

Morning all
Can't be arsed working today. Again.

But I'll have to, I suppose. I'm here now so might as well get on with it.

Well, in a bit...

*procrastinates*
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:13, Reply)

Morning Procrastination
Cereal

Make tea

Poo

Check news

Catch up on inane office gossip

"file" ie move stuff around your desk

Draw faces on all of your tangerines

Take lift to the 4th floor

Take lift back to the first floor

Lunch
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:18, Reply)

well I'm supposed
to be doing chemistry homework. I'm sort of procrastinating and sort of actually doing it. I'll do about 5 minutes worth then have a little fiddle on the net.

How are you all?
/huggles everyone.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:18, Reply)

So that's what I'm doing wrong
I never have any tangerines on which to draw faces.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:19, Reply)

Somtimes I'll draw on other types of fruit as well

but tangerines are my favourites as you can make them look like angry rangas!

What kind of Chemistry VC?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:23, Reply)

A former colleague
and office mate used to have loads of fruit lying around his desk. His wife used to pack his lunch and he'd get at least two pieces of fruit per day. He didn't always eat it all (although he did eventually - he had fruit binge days!) so there was always an orange or three sitting around.

Wish I'd thought of drawing on them.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:25, Reply)

high school Chemistry
currently doing the different kinds of bonding, Metallic, Ionic and Covalent bonding. Easy stuff. Did it last year cos I was smart(er) then. Just revision.

In a few weeks we get to put Potassium Manganese into Glycerol. I can't wait!
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:28, Reply)

Potassium Manganese?
Do you mean potassium permanganate? The really purple stuff?

Nice.

Don't get it on your hands or clothes. It stains like hell. The stains are browns though, not purple.

It used to be used as an antiseptic. On the (very old) bottle I found in the lab, there's something on the label about its uses in the 'sick room'. I was amused.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:32, Reply)

sorry yes
as I said - very very excited. cannot wait. Want to see stuff blow up!

I'm actually a shocking pyro. I got banned from the bunsen burners once cos I melted someone's pen and all the ink dribbled out and stained the benchtops. oh. and the room really smelled.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:35, Reply)

Pyromania FTW!
If you can get your hands on the ingredients, I recommend the aluminium powder/iodine experiment.

Mix together (I think it's 3 parts iodine to 1 of aluminium, by molar ratio, but it's not really critical) the two ingredients and form the mixture into a little volcano shape.

Put a couple of drops of water into the crater of your volcano, and stand well back. After a bit, the reaction starts and huge plumes of deep purple smoke are emitted. Then the aluminium catches fire and burns furiously. It's quite impressive.

It also smells quite a bit, and the purple smoke stains anything it lands on, because it's not actually smoke but sublimed iodine, which recondenses everywhere as yellow iodine solids.

I recommend doing it outside on a calm day. And not in a white fume cupboard in the lab. That would make a real mess, and end up in your having to clean up the evidence with an alcohol soaked rag for ages.

Not that I'd know anything about this, of course.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:43, Reply)

Morning all!
VC- hopefully your chemistry teacher isn't as harsh as mine. He was once doing an experiment with liquid nitrogen, and after smashing a frozen banana, one pupil asked what it would be like if a finger was to be frozen.

So, the teacher bungs on a leather glove, and proceeds to stick one of the fingers into the liquid nitrogen, until it is frozen. And then promptly smashes it with a hammer.

Everyone screamed, five vomited, three fainted.

Turned out he'd just filled the middle finger with sausage meat.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:47, Reply)

Mr. K,
What's the science behind that experiment, please?
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 8:54, Reply)

K2
We did the aluminium and iodine thing! Nicked the supplies from school and took them to the park.
The entrance to the park was a cut-through that contained the smoke beautifully - we could look down on it filling the cut. Then we saw the white car drive into the smoke and legged it.

edit: FFS I have never wanted to type bbq I always want car. Stupid phone!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:03, Reply)

piston
you just made me laugh so hard a little bit of wee came out.

and where would I be able to come across the ingredients for the iodine/aluminium volcano? could I just use store bought Iodine solution and then aluminium powder?
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:04, Reply)

VC
We "borrowed" ours from the school chemists lab but that was back before all high school students were potential terrorists.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:34, Reply)

Good to know I made you giggle VC
I laughed my arse off when he told me the story.

Or the one about the absent minded chemistry teacher who flushed sodium down the sink, which caused a drainpipe to explode.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:40, Reply)

wooooo
my phone came today wooo woooo woooooooooo

Just waiting for my number to be transfered over *twiddles thumbs*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:41, Reply)

Sorry for the delay
As far as I remember it's simply Al + 3I ---> AlI₃

The water just acts as a catalyst to get the reaction going.

@V-cat - iodine solution is not much use. You'd need to leave the top off the bottle to evaporate the alcohol away, then scrape out the solid iodine. Finding the aluminium powder will be harder, as it's a controlled substance due to its potential uses for nefarious purposes.

The easy way is to take a chunk of aluminium and a file...
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:51, Reply)

Oh, thanks!
I was wondering what the water was for, if there was gonna be oxides involved or anything.

Where would you say is an easy place to get iodine from in the UK?
Just get the solution from Boots and evap it?
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:54, Reply)

*blank faces*
Like my sex face, only with more emotion.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:57, Reply)

Don't really know about the iodine
There's not that much of it dissolved in iodine solution, so you'd probably need a few bottles of it for a decent volcano. I'm fortunate here, as we've got old bottles of stuff lying around, including solid iodine, that no-one wants, or even is aware of. :-)
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 9:59, Reply)

I was going to say
what would be a fast way to evaporate it? stick a small amount onto a ceramic plate in an oven on low heat and just bake it in dry heat??
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:00, Reply)

pretty good Mr Underwhelmed
I have Jaffa cakes! I is happy :D how are you?
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:12, Reply)

Don't try to evaporate the alcohol quickly
You'll just sublime the iodine away.

Room temperature for a couple of days should do it.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:14, Reply)

Ooooh,
What about those "iodine tablets" you get for water purification?
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:15, Reply)

awesome
thanks for that K2!
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:16, Reply)

Don't forget nitrogen tri-iodide...

( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:16, Reply)

'Ning.
I'm just counting down the days this week 'cos as of Friday I'm on leave for 2 weeks and a day!

And as an extra bonus, the project I'm working on is a piece of piss to appraise and it's THE ONLY THING I HAVE TO DO THIS WEEK!

I'm a very happy DG. Apart from the prospect of going to an evening meeting at the arse end of the county on Thursday which means I'll get home at about 11pm, that is.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:21, Reply)

Don't use chlorine!
It won't give you purple smoke, and it's likely to kill you if you get a lungful or two. Anyway, chlorine tablets aren't made of chlorine (it's a gas). They're probably sodium hypochlorite.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:27, Reply)

Less than two weeks until the bash...
My sleeping place and train tickets are booked, excitement levels are rising...

Can't fucking wait!!
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:30, Reply)

ahah
I think one of the highlights (note : not *the* highlight but *one of* them) of going to the UK will be finally going to a bash with everyone :D
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:36, Reply)

Indeed
Especially if I'm there in my awesome coat!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:36, Reply)

I've just
arranged a passenger for that very trip Pisty!

Anyone else needing assistance for the trip up 'Da East-Side' (of the British Isles) on the Thursday?

Word.
To your mother.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:36, Reply)

DG
it is a requirement that you wear your awesome coat the first time I meet you. I'll wear my red velvet jacket. We'll compare awesomeness.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:43, Reply)

And as a bonus
We'll both look very festive, since my coat of awesomeness is bottle green.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:49, Reply)

I'm sorted for transport
Heading up on the train. I will most likely be drunk by the time I get there.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:51, Reply)

mine is very luffly
and I like festive! wahey! that'll be goodly! bring tourettes as welllll.

aha piston - don't get too drunk. Puking on trains is no fun. I found that out once.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:53, Reply)

I couldn't possibly leave her behind!
It is a long way off, though, and she currently works in a school, so if it's anything other than a weekend, it'll be a no go.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:56, Reply)

Yo DG
I'm driving up to Edinburgh so I'll have a lot of ground to catch up on the drinking front!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:57, Reply)

Hey Badger
When are you likely to arrive? Are you staying centrally?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 10:59, Reply)

TGB will be found in close proximity to any cock thats going

(Bazongaloid, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:01, Reply)

I shall be arriving around 2pm
on the Friday and we are staying at Learmonth travelodge so I think it's about a mile west of the centre?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:01, Reply)

we are staying at Learmonth travelodge so I think it's about a mile west of the centre? getting some cock ASAP
(Bazongaloid, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:03, Reply)

Thanks Al

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:01, Reply)

Of course
how stupid of me!

*EDIT* Sounds perfect Badger.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:02, Reply)

I think we're going up
On Thursday.
I think...

*looks around for others*

*shrugs*
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:03, Reply)

Friday for us
We'll be arriving on teh train at approximately 5:30, I think. Then going to hotel, dumping gear, and in all probability will be slightly squiffy by 8 o'clock.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:05, Reply)

I'm going up on the Saturday
What with family to take care of and all. I should be arriving at about 3pm- enough time to check in and find the pub and get settled in and get sozzled. Hopefully I can find a friendly lady to prop me up on the way back to Castle Rock.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:08, Reply)

Well Piston,
I'll make sure you get back ok.
*grins*
It's the least I can do to walk my lady back :D
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:11, Reply)

Ah yes I'd forgotten about that!
Thanks Kaol the prop will be appreciated.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:15, Reply)

No problem,
No-one gets left behind, even if I have to haul you :p
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:15, Reply)

I shall be squiffy
in the mini pre bash bash :p
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:17, Reply)

I shall be squiffy
as I am going to an 18th that weekend! Huzzah!
First visit to a pub alone. Can't wait.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:18, Reply)

The pub is easy enough to find
As it's just off Princes Street, and nestled on a corner.

At the Waverly station end of Princes Street, look for the Burger King on the corner; the Guildford Arms is just behind it.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:19, Reply)

Oooooh...
Smashing coat?

I've got one of them. Leather so you don't get bits stabbing you, with a hammer in the pocket.
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:22, Reply)

I'm pretty sure
both me and lab have GPS on our phones so we shall find it!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:22, Reply)

Thanks Kaol
Much appreciated.

/Edit

I have google maps on my phone so I shouldn't have much of a problem. Comes in damned useful for Leeds. I cannot navigate round that city for toffee.

Incidentally whilst we're on the subject of bashes, who is coming to see me and Boss Keloid do standup?
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:23, Reply)

This is, of course,
Assuming that I don't end up having anything dangerous/too exciting happen to me.
Then I may well be roaming the streets of Edinburgh, naked and covered in blood.
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:31, Reply)

film it please?
I can't make it but I'd love to be there. You know that. :(

EDIT: film that too please kaol!
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:32, Reply)

Incidentally
If anyone wants my mobile number for the Friday, gaz me.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:33, Reply)

No!
There are some things that nobody should ever see.
That's one of them.
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:36, Reply)

VC
You want to see Kaol naked and covered in blood?

I'm not going to post my next thought.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:36, Reply)

Film it?
I once had some mates around for drinks when I was a student. One brought a video camera, and proceeded to spend the next 3 hours filming ourselves getting progressively more pissed.

Probably one of the funniest things I've ever watched. Especially the bit where Rob simulated masturbating with the rather phallically shaped (and pink) Vim bottle, and managed to spluff caustic powder all over the carpet thanks to a vigorous wrist/squeeze technique.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:37, Reply)

aha post it Piston
I dare you.

And no not really. Just thought it'd be good for a laugh.

The first ever time I got drunk I watched porn with the boys from my class. The rule was "don't get it out and nothing bad will happen!" and it passed the evening by in hilarity.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:40, Reply)

"don't get it out and nothing bad will happen!"?
I wish that was true.
There's always the biting :(
( Cawl, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:43, Reply)

VC
You really wouldn't want me to. It'd put you right off your vegemite.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 11:48, Reply)

ahah
I don't eat a lot of vegemite so it wouldn't matter.

Kaol. I was... 14. they were 14. I didn't particularly relish the idea of seeing eight 14 year old boys fwapping away over some tart who was trying (read failing) to be sexy. In the end we all ended up draining our shots when we heard her say "fuck me". we got pretty sloshed.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 12:01, Reply)

I can't blame you VC
It's vile stuff.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 12:06, Reply)

Blimey
Gone a bit quiet...
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:20, Reply)

Thread pronounced dead
at 13:20. The ressusitation team didn't make it :(

*EDIT* Hooray for the Light in Chains, for he hath breathed more life into the thread.

Innit.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:20, Reply)

Bloody hell
where is everybody these days?

everytime I come in here, it's deader than a bloody dodo.





hello DG, TLIC
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:23, Reply)

Hello flesh
*waves*

Yeah, it is a bit quiet. I think everyone is taking advantage of the nice weather and are having a prolonged liquid lunch in a beer garden somewhere.

The lucky bastards.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:25, Reply)

nice weather?
you have nice weather?

its fucking pissing it down here
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:32, Reply)

I'm having to do some work
it sucks!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:38, Reply)

The weather is lovely here
But alas I didn't take avail myself of a liquid lunch. I'm cutting out beer during the week. Going on a diet you see- fed up of being an internet lardarse.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:39, Reply)

Fair to say
it is glorious oop north. I went and sat on the wall outside at lunchtime and had a smoke. The ever so slight and gentle breeze wafted though my ears, whilst the sun shone down upon my bonce and tried its best to melt the wax that is keeping my hair up. It was good to be alive.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:44, Reply)

DG
You're starting to sound like John Peel- "Content to the point of being smug"
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:48, Reply)

Still wrong
I last posted about 10 minutes ago.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:51, Reply)

Rumbled...
Bugger. How are you anyway? You don't get around here much these days.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:56, Reply)

Yo ancrenne!
Good to see you again. how do?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:57, Reply)

I'm assuming
The timestamp on your own post answered that question.
And now I'm off to a meeting. Ugh!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 13:57, Reply)

Get around HERE much
The 'here' is very important. I was in no way impuning your integrity, as well you know...

:D
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:03, Reply)

The internet where I work is so damned slow
It's like being on a shared dialup connection. Very annoying.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:15, Reply)

Yeahahknow!
I can't wait. My coat is getting very excited at the prospect of coming out of the closet.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:16, Reply)

Sounds
mind crushingly dull and yet ever so important and necessary at the same time.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:21, Reply)

I can has bork hat plz?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:39, Reply)

and I bestow upon thee
Davros Grandad, the bork hat of doom, for borking an HSH thread for a record 29th time.
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:44, Reply)

29 times?
Really?

I am fucking awesome at borkage!

*Smugs*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:50, Reply)

DG
You do seem to have a knack for borking the thread.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:52, Reply)

29
by my count anyway.

could be more.

And now, I must be leaving - horrible kids to teach, and food to be eaten first
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 14:54, Reply)

I know
it is a supreme talent that I seem to have picked up somewhere along the way.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:00, Reply)

It could be worse DG
You could have broken people's minds. I do it to people on a regular basis with my old friends lemonparty, goatse, tubgirl and 2G1C.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:08, Reply)

Afternoon all
I'm sitting at home, off sick :(
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:12, Reply)

It's a bit worrying
That I know all those. Any reason you haven't included meatspin?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:13, Reply)

LiC
Quite simply, I forgot. But now, thanks to you, I have that damned song in my head.

"You spin me right round baby right round..."
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:17, Reply)

Well, you cocked that one up
You deserve a right bollocking.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:30, Reply)

Yeah
I feel like a right dick.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:39, Reply)

LiC
You ballsed those puns up.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:40, Reply)

*sigh*
*nicks hat from Davvy*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 15:50, Reply)

That's you left holding the bag
You're sacked.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 16:17, Reply)

Thats it
I'm off down the pub for a stiff one to drown my sorrows.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 16:23, Reply)

And that's another thread firmly borked.

( jim_bob can herd cats., Tue 31 Mar 2009, 17:05, Reply)

Is it too early
to start drinking?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 31 Mar 2009, 17:51, Reply)