Who do you think you are?
Well? Were your ancestors Kings of great nations, or intolerable knaves famed for rooting around the land? Perhaps you ancestors were knights who carved their way through the crusades, or Vikings who pillaged Europe. Maybe your forefathers made a discovery, or drew the first CDC. Tell us your past!

Bonus points for being interesting and/or funny.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 21:25, 35 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Fishermen, tailors and craftsmen on my mum's side, miners and criminals on my dad's.
Which is probably one of the reasons I like sailing, have steady, skilful hands, can see very well in the dark and have an irresistable compulsion to steal people's wallets. Your Honour.

The highest achiever in my family was my great-grandfather; he was a captain in the navy during World War I. And apparently a distant ancestor of my mother's helped found one of the Netherlands' first trade unions, but that's not confirmed.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 21:34, Reply)

Interesting *and* funny
2 bonus points to you sir! :)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 21:37, Reply)

Depressingly...
I am a descendant of one of Tomas de Torquemada's sisters. He was the dude behind the Spanish Inquisition and probably the most hated man in all of Spanish history. It is a source of great embarrassment in my family and we keep it quiet, which is why of course I am typing it here on the INTERNET.
(powervator and NONE SHALL PASS, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 21:47, Reply)

Again, interesting stuff!
My other half is a descendent of Oliver Cromwell. That's pretty huge, I reckon!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 21:50, Reply)

Based on my surname I am saxon
But so far family history research has only revealed centuries of peasantry. My First cousin however is from french stock, specifically french people who had to come to England over a minor legal misunderstanding about piracy/smuggling/treason charges.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:03, Reply)

Your 'fist' cousin? Poor thing!
But piracy? Are we talking family friendly pirates, or killy, rapey, robby type pirates?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:12, Reply)

YARRH
eighteenth century pirates! So yeah robbery and sex crimes area possibility if the family rumors are true
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:14, Reply)

I'd suggest not keeping up the family traditions... ;)

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:18, Reply)

Im related by marriage not blood
I am however keeping up the family traditions of dyslexia, geekdom and smoking.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:22, Reply)

Also
If your surname is "Ormes" and you come from London, you may be related to me. Apparently all people with this name spelt in this way are from one family who came from Spain or Portugal originally.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:13, Reply)

My mother is German and from a rich family but based on my maternal grandmothers personality, I'm probably a descendant of Hitler.
My fathers side is poor Lancashire weaving stock.
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:11, Reply)

my surname makes me from viking stock originally
apparently my not-too-distant ancestors on mother's side were aristos who lost a lot of money gambling...

grandfather on my dad's side flew these ww2db.com/aircraft_spec.php?aircraft_model_id=250 or something like them in world war 2, which is quite cool

edit: more interestingly, my ex is descended directly, or almost directly from the pirate Henry Morgan
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:12, Reply)

My maternal grandmother's family
were distantly related to Prince Albert, and had a castle in Germany which the Nazis nicked. It was a lunatic asylum for a while, but I think it's derelict now.
My gran did a bunch of research, and I think I'm 2000th in line to the throne or something ridiculous.

On the paternal side...circus/carnival people, smugglers and general scallywags unto the nth generation.

Strange things, families.
(berk, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:12, Reply)

Indeed.
But surely you have a nefarious plan to off the 1,999 in front of you? A series of horrific bus 'accidents', perhaps?
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:17, Reply)

Miner
One of my great grand fathers is worthy of a darwin award. He was a miner who went back to get the dynamite that was a little late in going boom. Oops...
Otherwise my most famous ancestor had had a northern part of scotland named after him, not bad for a ferryman.
( hedge_diver, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:14, Reply)

One of my great grandfathers got to fire one of these
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BL_14_inch_Mk_VII_naval_gun
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:30, Reply)

For me:
On the English side we're mostly farmers and coppers, although there are a few scientists. Quite what happened to me I don't know. My most well-respected ancestor happens to be this chap.

On the Danish side, we're pretty definitely from the Jutland Vikings, and there is a quaint insistence that we're on the wrong part of the royal line. But that's most likely untrue. However, I await the day that I am called to ascend to the Danish throne. Hurray!
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:16, Reply)

My mum is actually half Danish/German so that means I have a little bit of Danish in me : )
Edit - We also have someone who was a raving loonatic on my German side. Hence my joining this site.
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:18, Reply)

No loonies in my family
Just a lot of engineers.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:22, Reply)

Half Danish/German?
My lord. What an unholy union that must have been! ;)

EDIT: We've one loon, on the English side. One of those guys who is so crazily intelligent he's a little bit mad. He is a lecturer in Biomedical Science and designed one of the first hip replacements. He's written books and is something of an authority on the subject. Can't tie his own shoelaces though.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:23, Reply)

Mine lived in an asylum until he escaped and raped one of my female descendants.
It did answer a lot of questions about my family when I found out.
( girlinthehole, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:29, Reply)

sounds nasty

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:35, Reply)

Ooh, I'm from various stock I think
But, for the last hundred years, my namesakes seem to be gathered around New England and the Scottish Borders and not graduated too far.

There was however, a lad with my surname (and there aren't many of us) actually born on the Mayflower.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:35, Reply)

Oceanus Hopkins?

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:36, Reply)

Hehe, no
It was a Benjamin Wight. Google my name and you get a lot of Maine hicks moaning about tractors.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:38, Reply)

I vaugely remember oceanus hopkins
as a English child born in a seventeenth century transatlantic crossing
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:41, Reply)

All over realy.
On my mums side, kentish farmers, miners, french shopkeepers (I think?) and a sweedish captain who went down with his ship, accidentaly or not I don't know, he might just have been a bad swimmer! On my dad's side, london criminals and circus performers (My great grandad was capable of tearing telephone directories in half - one of his tricks apparently. God knows why i'm a scrawny little fucker... clearly those genes missed me), Communists (my grandad got the full send off - we sung the red flag at his funeral) trade unionists, and jewish criminals/commies (my great grandad fought in the spanish civil war. When we got some of his effects he had several different passports in different identities) who either ran from austria to escape the pogroms or escape the law. Possibly both. Realy quite fascinating stuff. Shame that some of the stranger ones are either out of contact or dead realy.
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 22:52, Reply)

My missus
tore a telephone directory in half, but that was a few years back before they changed the glue on the spine (which prevents you from cracking i to get it started.)
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 23:12, Reply)

Yeah
Apparently that was how it was often done, breaking the spine and then tearing it. I think he was a circus strongman, and he had a bunch of tricks like that. Another one apparently involved breaking a leather belt that was wrapped around him. I think there must have been a trick to that one too....
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 6:51, Reply)

Some of my ancestors....
Fought in quite a special Clan War with their dearest rivals, the unsavoury Clan Keith. It may possibly have been the last clan war ever in Scotland but I can't confirm this either way. What is certain is that the Keiths (boo) and the Gunns (yay), have always hated each other.

So anyway, a fine lass by the name of Helen of Braemore was betrothed (fantastic word!) to Alexander Gunn. She was also known as "The Beauty" of Braemore, and her looks were envied and admired across the Highlands. The insidious Dugald, Chieftain of the Keiths held an incredible fancy for our Helen, and made an unsavoury approach towards her. Upon embarrassing rejection, Dugald plotted revenge. On the night before the wedding the Keiths without warning set upon the relatives of the Bride and Groom, who were enjoying the obligatory pre-wedding celebrations. Alexander was brutally slain, although he put up a brave resistance, along with many family members. Helen meanwhile was abducted and imprisoned in Ackergill tower.

While imprisoned, how shall I put it, she fell victim to the insidious and disgusting Dugulds lecherous and licentious behaviour. In despair the Beauty of Braemore threw herself one fateful night from the tower, to her death.

After further years of conflict following this sad event, it was eventually agreed that once and for all their differences would be decided at a Chapel called St Tears - the Battle of Champions, with 12 horse on either side.

The 12 Gunns first appeared and seeing the lack of Keiths, entered the Chapel to pray. But those dastardly Keiths in a "Usual Suspects" like twist - entered the fray with 2 men per horse-back, doubling their number. Into St Tears they entered, and under the altar slaughtered every one of their foe, although sustaining equal if not more casualties of their own.

But don't worry Gunn fans, one of the relatives later murdered the Chieftain of the Keiths in revenge, piercing his heart with an arrow and uttering the immortal: “Iomach gar n’ Guinach gu Keith;” that is, “The Gunns’ compliments to the Keiths.”

**Edit - *ahem* these are of course distant relatives, with the battle being fought in the 1400's.....
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 23:03, Reply)

nothing much
The paternal family lineage worked on barges on the rivers Humber, Trent, Ouse et al. Great Grandad was a river pilot. Another great grandad was German.

My mum's side of the family were from Beverley (not far from Hull) and seem to have lived there for generations.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 23:10, Reply)

My ancestors helped create the doomsday book

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 23:53, Reply)

Ooh
On my Mum's side, there are hints of old blue blood from the surname Crossland- apparently they used to be big shots somewhere in West Yorkshire. And makes me related to a big portion of Barnsley. And the surname Ardron is... well I don't know actually. But apparently blue blood once again. But three generations back one of my ancestors had a *cough* liaison with a gypsy prince (the proper ones, not those pikey bastards), and it still embarrasses Gran to this day. So thanks to her I'm gypsy royalty, apparently. Oh, and I may be decended from Captain Cook (well, related to him). This however needs further research.

And to my Dad. With his surname, it goes back 400 years with absolutely nothing of note, until you count the French influence. They were French Huguenots who came over to England when they were being persecuted, and to this day all members of my family on Dad's side have the right to get married in Canterbury Cathedral. I may well exercise this right- just for the hell of it. And, so I'm told, one of them was a member of the Academie Francais- the very same body set up by Cardinal Richeleiu.

Oh, and my Dad reads the news on the radio for all of East Anglia all the way over to Hertfordshire, if that counts.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 15 Jul 2009, 23:57, Reply)

I'm Norn Irish.
My great-great grandfather was a farmhand and my great-great grandmother was a potato.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 16 Jul 2009, 0:07, Reply)

According to Mother,
who is so immersed in geneology I'm beginning to think it is actually a cult, her side traces back from Texas to Georgia, previously to England, then to the Orkney Islands. My father's side is almost the same but without the islands. On both sides there are a small handfull of germans and 1 french guy.

Apparently the most common employment options my ancestors chose were either in government (judges, law enforcement, etc) or as artists/artisans. We also had merchants who owned ships apparently. Though, in recent years, we've seen a significant increase in psychologists.

The most interesting bit though, is that if you go back on Mother's paternal line and Father's maternal line......a few generations back, they go to the same person. Yes, my parents are (distant) cousins. (which explains sooooooo much)
( flirting with badgers What? It sounded good at the time., Thu 16 Jul 2009, 3:43, Reply)