I was just about to add a post
when I spotted this 'Please think twice before adding line breaks -- your post will be skipped over if it looks too spread out or is a wall of text'

When did we start getting tips on how not to be crap on Off Topic? -post your suggestions for tips you'd like to add to the list here
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:15, 28 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

"Please think twice before posting pictures of your cock"
then again, that advice could be used in any internetty sitch
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:20, Reply)

I thought about it many times
and with each passing thought, I got harder and harder
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:21, Reply)

*sweats*

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:28, Reply)

"being a cunt has a limited shelf-life and gets boring quite quickly"
"Remember, this isn't /talk"

Would be two I'd like to add
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:22, Reply)

Is your post interesting
to anyone but yourself? You narcissistic, yawn-inducing FUCK?
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:53, Reply)

wow.
Hugely friendly response there. Loving the whole chilled, laid back sie of your personality. No no, seriously, made me smile.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:58, Reply)

Hmm, I seem to have touched a nerve
Interesting.
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:01, Reply)

see I was actually serious.
it made me giggle. It just sounded so ridiculous in my head - I could picture you saying that with the funniest expression on your face.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:11, Reply)

Where are the emoticons
when you need them? :-p
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:15, Reply)

the one time I don't use them, after months of people complaining,
I get asked where they are.. :P
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:20, Reply)

Silly Poppet
I think it was a suggestion, rather than an attack directed at me. I haven't been a narcisstic, self-obsessed tool for ages
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:09, Reply)

I have no beef
with you Bert. Or anybody, really. I'm being 'controversial' for a change.
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:11, Reply)

o u
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:15, Reply)

Cuntroversial
That ought to enter the OED, it's brilliant.
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:18, Reply)

I wasn't sure if this was a suggestion
or a critique of the original post.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:05, Reply)

I thought about using
quotation marks, but I kind of like the ambiguity it serves up.
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:07, Reply)

I approve

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:10, Reply)

Oh, I have so much to post for this.
I'll post more later.
Etc.
Good times.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 13:55, Reply)

My mate, we'll call him 'P' and his girlfriend, 'H'...
*snaps*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:14, Reply)

Is your post a scene from Star Wars
Re-told in such a way as to conceal that fact for as long as possible?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:12, Reply)

Is your post
the same old shit about beating up Mr T, worded in a slightly different way each time?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:14, Reply)

Haha
Are you the self-proclaimed saviour of b3ta?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:15, Reply)

those are funny though
well, if they are done by mon bison, and a select couple of others
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:16, Reply)

You *don't* like those?
I fucking LOVE a well-encrypted Star Wars post
( chart cat has an itch, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:16, Reply)

It's getting a bit old
Probably not quite dead yet by the looks of things.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 14:23, Reply)

does your post
involve that shittiest of cars, the Honda Accord?
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 17:41, Reply)

• Be yourself.
• Don't be judgemental.
• Make an effort to get to know and get on with everyone.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:54, Reply)

Stop with the
"...for that is his name"

and

"...but I digress"
(NDayave , Hooray For, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 12:18, Reply)