Monday evening. At least the worst part of the week is over.


If you could only wear one outfit you own for the rest of your life, what would it be?
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:38, 67 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

My outfit
Tie-died t-shirt, combat trousers with lots of pockets, hiking-boots, and a comfortable pair of underpants.

Have spent the worst part of the week hiding by taking a day off.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:48, Reply)

Would love a week off about now. Far too much shit going on at work at the moment,
including a whole day today where every single train was delayed. Bye bye annual leave.

Am currently thinking my rainbow felt bead necklace I bought in Siena, black netting skirt with pink spots, and black top of some description. And boots. For some reason it makes me feel like Carrie Bradshaw.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:52, Reply)

winter wetsuit
wetsuit boots, wetsuit gloves
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:50, Reply)

Can you not spring amusingly in wetsuit boots?
*wants, if this is true*
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:56, Reply)

spring amusingly?
as in bounce?

lamentably not
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:57, Reply)

Gah. Shame.
I will still use this as an opportunity to try surfing, though.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:58, Reply)

do it
it'll change your life
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:58, Reply)

Guitar was the first step.
I shall be the first surfer to plink a cheap acoustic guitar across the waves of Kent.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:59, Reply)

Have never tried surfing
but did once go body-boarding. Getting a feel for the waves is the first step.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:03, Reply)

Is now a good time to mention
that I can't swim for shit? I'm totally at home in the sea, but only if I can spazzflail about and not actually have to swim.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:03, Reply)

Funnily enough
I learned how to swim in the sea. Kept walking into the sea when at the beach, and then realised that I could still float if my legs weren't on the sea-bottom. A bit of experimentation later and I figured out how to swim.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:08, Reply)

I can flail ineffectually, as anyone who went on our team trip to the posh manor with the swimming pool will attest.
However, ask me to do this at more than a literal crawl and I can't...
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:13, Reply)

I can't swim
At all.

How crap is that?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:08, Reply)

Not that crap.
I can't sing, and this galls me.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:18, Reply)

I can just visualise the two of you at a beach having this conversation
TD is in the sea and Maladicta on the beach.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:21, Reply)

No no no
I'm not going into the sea.

Don' make me go in that sea, bro...
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:29, Reply)

But you can frolic with the crabs and lobsters!

( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:33, Reply)

I've only worn a wetsuit twice
but I found that when I heat up the water, it gives me a nice warm feeling. But maybe that was because the last time I wore one it was winter.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:57, Reply)

Rip Curl's wetsuit shampoo isn't called Piss Off for no reason

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:57, Reply)

I prefer using patience rather than piss to heat my wetsuit thankyouverymuch

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:14, Reply)

a no-brainer this one...
full motorbike gear.
i would never get on a bike without it and i ain't giving up riding.
simples.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:52, Reply)

Simples indeed!
I possess a leather coat I absolutely adore, so if I ever stop wearing the silk corset coat I got in Camden some time ago, I might start wearing that again.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:54, Reply)

same reason as my wetsuit comment
I want to be able to surf, in whatever conditions, so it has to be that

also, as far as I'm aware a man in skin-tight rubber is welcome at any occasion.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:55, Reply)

Even Ambassadors' dinners?

( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:57, Reply)

in my experience
yes
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:58, Reply)

Given most politicians' predilections for such things, this surprises me.

( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 19:58, Reply)

me in leather, V in rubber and you in lace?
wow!
*tumesces*
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:05, Reply)

Lace?
Wait, what?
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:13, Reply)

lace corset coat.
be careful what you say on the internet...
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:14, Reply)

But 'tis a silk coat.
Awesome coat is awesome; if I could be arsed to take a photo I'd show you.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:15, Reply)

you used the words "silk", "corset" and i appear to have imagined the word "lace".
a classic example of the Freudian Slip.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:19, Reply)

Gah. Now I've just been reminded I want another corset.
*rocks back and forth* only three days till pay day...
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:20, Reply)

what's the collective noun for corsets, i wonder...
how about a constriction of corsets?
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:21, Reply)

A OH GOD OH GOD I CAN'T BREATHE
of badly-fitting corsets.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:30, Reply)

An asphyxiation of corsets?

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:44, Reply)

This works better
than mine. A bit like the oh god of hangovers.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:45, Reply)

I'd call it the uuuuhhhh of hangovers
pronounced like the sound Sideshow Bob makes when he steps on a rake.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:49, Reply)

*spang* nyyuuuhhuunnnh.

( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:50, Reply)

* self-spang *
uuuuhhhh
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:57, Reply)

And when he's in the middle of the big circle of rakes :D

( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:05, Reply)

No seasonal allowances?
I'd be wearing my dog-walking stuff all year round, which is shirt and knackered jeans in good weather, waxed coat, hat and waterproof trousis in less clement conditions.

That assumes that I'm going to spend every day walking the dogs. Me and some dogs that I know would be very pleased with that but at some stage I must go to work to earn money to buy dog (and cat) food.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:07, Reply)

marra!
hoo'st tha' jaarn urn?
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:09, Reply)

Reet smart our lad.
An tha?
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:11, Reply)

me sneck's fair gowpin', bonny lad.
the bairn managed to clonk me with her noggin about 6 times whilst we were larking about. i'm surprised there wasn't blood!
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:16, Reply)

Composure slightly rattled at present.
Big kitty is in vets overnight having an abcess removed.

Little kitty has become alarmed by all this and has run away.

Off to find little kitty. Hopefully back later.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:56, Reply)

Oh noes!
I hope kitteh turns up OK :(
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:04, Reply)

righto dude, good luck on the kitty patrol...
catch you later...
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:15, Reply)

My birthday suit
What?

It's dead smart - got it from M&S and all.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:12, Reply)

Ah well
at least you weren't dyslexic when you were shopping.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:17, Reply)

Never thought of that
Could have had some serious consequences.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:23, Reply)

Like some odd stains on the birthday suit?

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:26, Reply)

Yeah, you want to be careful with hot wax.
A bugger to get out...
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:30, Reply)

But if you made the wax stains into a nice pattern
I'd happily wear it with solidified wax.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:41, Reply)

Just don't go near anything abrasive
because there is no pain in the world like being waxed.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:42, Reply)

The closest I got to being waxed
was pulling individual nose-hairs out with a pair of tweezers. I'd imagine being waxed would feel like that a thousand times over, but at the same time.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:47, Reply)

Imagine pulling a plaster off your knee, over and over and over.
But worse.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:49, Reply)

When doing martial arts
I've landed knee-first on a surface that did just that to my knee-hairs.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:00, Reply)

OW OW FUCKITY OW.
Gave myself a dead knee on my desk drawers today and remembered just in time that yelling "FUCKING CUNTING CUNT!" wasn't the best course of action in an office where people are on the phone...
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:04, Reply)

Sometimes if I lower my elbow and hit the armrest off-centre, I can feel a pain that goes all the way up to my hand.

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:10, Reply)

Yes
And pulling things other than business cards out of the pockets at meetings.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:31, Reply)

I can top that.
Emergency condom dropped out of my bag in front of the boss. Not cool.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:41, Reply)

I hear they do lovely birthday suits these days.
Personally bar the very occasional set of lingerie I can't find anything in there I like.
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:17, Reply)

As a bloke who hates clothes shopping
places like M&S, Debenhams and the like are great. They make it easy to identify suitable clothes, then pay and exit in the fastest possible time.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:25, Reply)

I am a lady who loves shopping.
M&S reminds me of too many Saturdays in Cardiff looking for the perfect gran coat for my nan...
( Maladicta, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 20:27, Reply)

OOOOOOOOOOh theres sooooo many choices !
How about my white/black corset, black knit pants, ponte knit riding coat and my piratey black pleathah booooots
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:18, Reply)

Nipple tassles and biker boots.

( girlinthehole, Mon 28 Sep 2009, 21:43, Reply)

Outfit?
The one i wore for my wedding. Oh yeah.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 28 Sep 2009, 23:21, Reply)