It's a bit moany in here today, so to lighten the mood

I just went to the loo and let rip with a massive fart and burp at the same time! This amused me no end as I'm a juvenile twat, but I did worry that the burp was made of fart and my breath now smells of poo.

What awesome/disgusting things has your body done recently?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 9:59, 19 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

if you had sneezed at the same time you would have become immortal
or exploded
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:08, Reply)

I woke up with a wotsit in my bed.
It was undamaged.
(TheColonel, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:15, Reply)

My body hasn't done anything awesome or disgusting for ages.
It's just there at the other end of my neck doing nothing of interest.
( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:27, Reply)

I reckon it's done something disgusting
within the last month.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:30, Reply)

No not even that.
I'm on the mini pill and don't get them anymore.
( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:32, Reply)

all the pills I've seen are pretty small
how small does it have to be to be mini?

how big was the other one?
this big?
lh3.ggpht.com/_pBfObnJwOiY/SCD9JcTVeqI/AAAAAAAACFU/eiXe0JA6F28/DSCF1140.JPG

or this big?
3.bp.blogspot.com/_hqWSBaiHG_s/SbhKazRRiwI/AAAAAAAAARU/L57I61pn8So/s400/Giant_pill.jpg
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:35, Reply)

What!?
I didn't mean that! I just reckon that within the last month, you've got all squelchy down below and had a good play.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:36, Reply)

That is not disgusting.

( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:37, Reply)

It is if you're doing it.
BOOYAH!
(Bazongaloid, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:38, Reply)

*sad face*

( girlinthehole, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:41, Reply)

I'll get him for you, BGB
Naughty al! Go to your bed!
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:42, Reply)

I pulled out a bum hair
that was longer than Meatloaf
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:39, Reply)

I'll bet it wasn't longer
than one of his bloody epic songs though.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 13:32, Reply)

My brother tells a tale
of an occasion when, with an upset stomach, he let rip a wet, stinking follow-though fart. Convinced that at the very least he was going to have to bin his underpants, he made his sorry way to a public lavatory, dropped his trousers and.....


Nothing but a single grain of rice in the back of his pants. The way he tells this story you'd think it was on a par with the Marie fucking Celeste.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:42, Reply)

This has got me in fits right here.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 11:24, Reply)

I did the same
I was so impressed I texted half my phonebook, haha!

It's not so much my body, more my brain power that was awesome last night. I got a question right on a quiz, and had absolutely no idea how I knew the answer until about 10 minutes ago.

The question was something like, "What S was the name of the festival that was a precursor to Halloween?" The answer being Samhain. Turns out I knew it from Halloween III, the one without Michael Myers in it.

Now if only I'd got the much simpler "Who played the babysitter that was terrorised by Michael Myers". As I'm a retard, I turned to my mates and said 'If only they were talking about Hallowe'en, that'd be Jamie Leigh-Curtis.'.

But, as previously stated, I'm a retard
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:47, Reply)

Grew large tumours.
Benign, but disgusting nonetheless.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:49, Reply)

maybe beten on a good day?
/awful joke
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 10:50, Reply)

I had a great big migraine all day yesterday.
And as a result I had a really good vomit at about 10 O'clock last night.
Now I'm dehydrated and I feel hungover.
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 11:47, Reply)