This morning,
I discovered I had been invited to one of those stupid facebook groups.
Only it was entitled
"Girls shouldn't sleep with their best friend's boyfriends!"
Oops.
I laughed at the wonderful irony, and considered joining for a fraction of a second, for said irony. Then ignored the request and blocked the sender, like I always do.

What ironic, or brilliantly fitting things have happened to you recently?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:18, 53 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I took the mickey out of people threatening suicide on the internet
and then on saturday night my best friend hung themselves.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:23, Reply)

I think you will find it is "hanged"

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:27, Reply)

I was actually just thinking that

(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:28, Reply)

you can say hung as soon as they are dead

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:29, Reply)

until gamey

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:30, Reply)

true
he was dead when I found him, so I was right in the first place.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:31, Reply)

in that case you were well within your rights to tuck in

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:34, Reply)

I did
but I only ate his legs so his family could have an open casket.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:37, Reply)

Very considerate of you....

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:41, Reply)

Thinking of the family at this difficult time.
Very thoughtful.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:54, Reply)

I'm all heart me

(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:59, Reply)

whereabouts in Winchester are you/will you be?
I'm from there, you see. Parts of it are very beautiful - much of it indescribably dull.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:03, Reply)

Winnall
just round the corner from Tesco, which is useful as I like to have somewhere nearby to eat and shit.

Usually I use your mums vagina, but sometimes I like a change.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:06, Reply)

Incidently, was this you on Channel 4 last night?
i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/05/05/article-1177595-04D192C3000005DC-138_468x286.jpg
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:15, Reply)

That is going to give me nightmares.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:19, Reply)

Ugh. Winnal is where the proles who work in the factories live.
If you get the chance it's well worth taking a stroll around the college area, which is where I had the marvellous good fortune to live in my time there. It's stunning.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:16, Reply)

Sadly I won't have any time
It's strictly in-BANG-BANG-BANG-out.

Much like when I visited your mother.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:17, Reply)

Oh man, I hope I haven't upset Monty

(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:24, Reply)

I'm not sure that is possible
without stooping to sub-Bert levels
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:25, Reply)

Ha not at all dear boy.
Just had to answer the phone...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:29, Reply)

But seriously
was that you on Secret Millionaire last night?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:32, Reply)

If I am a millionaire
it's being kept secret from me too, I can assure you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:37, Reply)

She did mention
that she'd been forced to take pot-shots at a faux Geordie who was wanking in her garden. I wondered if that might be you.

Hung like a sparrow, she said.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:29, Reply)

I was at Winnal Moors on Sunday
Trying to get a bonfire going. We were clearing scrub to encourage the pretty flowers.

I almost blew my lungs out my mouth, it was so damp.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:39, Reply)

Yes,
It stops all the "well hung" jokes, and makes it easier for the newsreader to say it without pissing themselves.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:31, Reply)

Where else but b3ta
Would you find a discussion about grammar in replies to a post about suicide.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:34, Reply)

Personally
I don't think many newsreaders would have an issue with giggling if the correct term were "hung" rather than "hanged"
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:36, Reply)

Tonight, tragedy strikes Haiti, *titter*
Like this then?

I'll go for that.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:44, Reply)

Well, at least he died with a hardon

Assuming it was a guy
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:28, Reply)

If he was a physisist he could have died with a Hadron.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:43, Reply)

^I'm going to edit this into a less shit joke when I can think of one.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:44, Reply)

It's going to be there for a while then.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:45, Reply)

haha

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:20, Reply)

Or a Roman Emperor
could die with a Hadrian.

Edit - Agree with above about shit joke.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:44, Reply)

I think the dying part...
...outweighs the benefit of the unused stiffy.

(At least for the dead dude - a passing necrophiliac may disagree.)
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:43, Reply)

Also known as 'Angel Lust'

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:47, Reply)

or 'Carradine's Revenge'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:51, Reply)

or
not very picky
(Halfy By light alone, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 12:54, Reply)

The 'Hutchence Hump'.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:04, Reply)

Digital Underground's disappointing single
cashing in on their earlier hit.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:06, Reply)

The video with the 'twitchy' dance was banned...
...which further hindered any chart success.

BTW Sex Packets - great album.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:29, Reply)

Wasn't it just?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Isn't 'stupid facebook groups' a tautology?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:00, Reply)

That depends
On what a tautology is.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:03, Reply)

Two words used which both describe the same thing
such as a Grumpy Monty, or a Genius Bowie.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:07, Reply)

I like this description

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:13, Reply)

It does depend very much upon that, you're right.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:07, Reply)

Yes.
I fucking hate them all over my stream. Anyone that joins too many/invites me to them gets blocked or hidden.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:14, Reply)

I found a black fly in my Chardonnay.
Isn't it ironic.
( girlinthehole, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:16, Reply)

Alanis Morissette would think so.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:31, Reply)

...and a spoon would have done after all.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:39, Reply)

It's a metaphor!

( djtrialprice, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:55, Reply)

Lucky it wasn't Spanish Fly...
...then again
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 26 Jan 2010, 13:43, Reply)