We need another version of this pafe, for posters who aren't gentle.
We could call it Oaf Topic.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:09, 52 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

oof topic

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:11, Reply)

How's you?
I haven't seen you about the other place lately.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

I'm not mean enough to hang out on /talk

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:22, Reply)

You could fake it.
Most of them do.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:24, Reply)

that's the thing...I can't even fake it
I'm shit at insults
plus I don't like being mean, whether I mean it or not
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:29, Reply)

Or one for people who don't live between Cancer and Capricorn
/offtropic.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

Don't make me link my blog at you.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

Is there anything I can do to stop you?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:23, Reply)

Yes.
But you're too scared.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:24, Reply)

Or
For those who want to discuss the cheesy, dipsomaniac, singing '80s TV star of Knight Rider and Baywatch fame.

Hoff Topic.

I am so, so sorry.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:19, Reply)

I've created a monster.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:20, Reply)

I found a discarded selection box at the back of a kitchen cupboard
It must have been from a Christmas a few years ago. There were a couple of chocolate bars left, they were well past their use by date though, so I had to bin them. One of them was an off Topic.

Eyethangyew.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:23, Reply)

You were owned by the third Off Topic post.
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post188585
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:31, Reply)

Or French B3tans who like eggs.
Oeuf topic
( girlinthehole, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:25, Reply)

this is rather good

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:29, Reply)

*bows*

( girlinthehole, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:31, Reply)

A place for american rich kids who want to pretend they are alternative
we could call it Hot Topic.

wait....
( Peej, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:28, Reply)

A place for french people lacking in enthusiasm
/bof topic
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:30, Reply)

Or somewhere for the aristocracy to hang out and talk about how their rights have been violated due to the hunting ban.
And the size of their stately homes and stables.

/Toff topic.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:33, Reply)

All those people who like to post how ill / hungover they are
Could move to Cough Topic
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:33, Reply)

For the R'n'B/Rap enthusiasts
/Puff Topic.

getting desperate now
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:34, Reply)

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:36, Reply)

For cardigan wearing, cuddly uncle types
with a liking for coke and prostitutes...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:38, Reply)

EXACTLY!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:43, Reply)

A section for recipes.
/Scoff topic!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:38, Reply)

or a place for 3rd-rate awful poets:
McGough Topic
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:50, Reply)

or for 'Great Suprendo' fans.....
'Pif-paf-pof Topic'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:50, Reply)

How about one dedicated to the gentlemanly art of raising one's hat
at an attractive lady. Doff topic.
( Sunburn Go on.... It's character building!, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:51, Reply)

Governor Tarkin fans?
Moff Topic.


Surely this wins?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Taking part means you lose.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:55, Reply)

Or the corner of the site where people can pander to women and claim they've had sex.
muff topic
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:56, Reply)

That's the internet in general.
And may I say you're looking well.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:58, Reply)

it's because I have breasts

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:01, Reply)

I know what they are.
I've had sex.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:01, Reply)

with a person?
Wow. What was it like?

Eh, I mean, me too. Yeah.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:04, Reply)

It was like SKY ROCKETS IN FLIGHT!

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:06, Reply)

I wish people would break into song more often
particularly if 4 part harmonies are involved.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:09, Reply)

Or one for live role-players to discuss
what they have just ordered from the 'stout yeoman of the bar.'
Quaff Topic.
( Sunburn Go on.... It's character building!, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:57, Reply)

this reminds me that I was watching Worst Jobs in History
with Tony Robinson (I wasn't watching it with him, he was presenting it)

In Tudor times, Henry VIII had someone to wipe his arse who was called the Groom of the Stool.

Apparently said chap was quite a powerful person.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:59, Reply)

Nice.
Actually sounds more attractive than my current job.
*sends CV to Prince Phillip*
( Sunburn Go on.... It's character building!, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:21, Reply)

I've studied the Tudor court at some length
The Groom of the Stool was such an important post because he had the king's ear in private. He also had the King's shitty anus in his face, so it wasn't all larks...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 16:10, Reply)

what about a place for hazelnut bars past their sell-by date...
'Off Topic'.

Err....
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:59, Reply)

not only has that already been mentioned here
but it was the third ever post on off topic.

you substantial spastic
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 14:59, Reply)

Substantial spastic
is now my favourite phrase.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:06, Reply)

spoken like a true insubstantial spastic

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 16:11, Reply)

For people who like mashing the keyboard randomly and talking to themselves
myopic topic
(Fancy a weekend on my Raymondo Luxury Yacht?, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:08, Reply)

For people who now dislike Egyptian
Off Coptic
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:18, Reply)

A farting thread.
/Guff Topic.

And as I can't see it further up, a bad metal one. Goff Topic.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Paint
everything black and listen to some glum old woman warble over some industrial noise?

goff topic
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Are you a great mind or a fool?
I know which I am.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 28 Jan 2010, 15:46, Reply)

bit of both

(Halfy By light alone, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 16:18, Reply)

Regarding the appropriately named Danny Dyer's character in the drug film 'Human Traffic'
Moff topic.

And I know the Star Wars version has already been done.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 28 Jan 2010, 18:30, Reply)