NEW THREAD
GLASTONBURY
Stevie Wonder, Muse, and U2 semi confirmed.

Tell me your opinions on that eh?
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:25, 70 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

*cue Stevie Wonder 'seeing' joke'*

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:26, Reply)

No, I will have none of that in my thread.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:28, Reply)

What goes "hissssssssss Aaaaaaaaaaaarggggggh"?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:33, Reply)

Why can't Stevie Wonder read?

( Peej, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:42, Reply)

Because he's blind...?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:44, Reply)

I think the hilarious punchline is "because he's black"

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:45, Reply)

lolracism.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:49, Reply)

Stevie Wonder is black?
I didn't know as I'm blind myself
( Peej, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:50, Reply)

we can't Stephen Hawking jump?
also, best joke ever: what's the fastest thing on land?

Stevie Wonder's speedboat
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:51, Reply)

Why can't he jump?
tell meeeeeeeeee
( Peej, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:53, Reply)

because he's white

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:54, Reply)

you knows it

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:02, Reply)

Stevie Wonder walks into a shop
and starts swinging his guide dog around by its lead. The manager storms up and says, "What do you think you're doing?" To which Stevie replies "just having a look round".
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:46, Reply)

I have just 'lolled'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:13, Reply)

What goes
*click click click* "Is that it?"
*click click click* "Is that it?"
*click click click* "Is that it?"

Stevie Wonder playing with a Rubik's Cube.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:11, Reply)

I like to assume glastonbury is not as good as it was
mainly because I've not been able to justify going since 1999
it better not be good
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:29, Reply)

I've been for the last two years
it's possibly the most fun I've ever had and it is my favorite place in the world.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:31, Reply)

i refuse to believe it
since I don't have a spare £150 and I have another field to be a different kind of geek in.
Also, it probably got even worse the last two years
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:37, Reply)

It's been shit since 1991

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:35, Reply)

Have you been since 1991?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:36, Reply)

1992
Plus I have a television.

When they got rid of the Travellers' Field it became completely gay.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:38, Reply)

TV's not the same,

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:41, Reply)

You get a different lineup from the TV?
I'm just not a Will Young/Oasis kind of fellow.

One of my old mates is married to Emily Eavis, I could go VIP if I wanted to, I just can't be fucking arsed. It's full of cash machines, mobile phone masts and cunts these days.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:45, Reply)

There's more than one stage and there's plenty to do even if you don't see a single band.
There's obviously no reason to argue with you though.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:49, Reply)

you can spend days
drumming
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:50, Reply)

Tsk
You must leave time for juggling, and wacky jester hat wearing.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:51, Reply)

i did wear a cloak to the 1998 one
and convinced my friend to buy and wear a golden waistcoat made of old curtains. Proper crazy, us
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:59, Reply)

None whatsoever
Go, have a great time, I just don't don't want to go myself, that's all.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:51, Reply)

The Wurzels have confirmed too.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:59, Reply)

*gets on the phone to Eavis*
I would have liked to have seen Shakin Stevens when he played (last year? Year before?)
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:01, Reply)

Based on the fact that I won't be going
I don't really care have one.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:31, Reply)

Are we talking Glastonbury
or the Royal Variety Performance?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:35, Reply)

They're much the same as each other

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:47, Reply)

Muse, yes

Other two no, the whole legend thing is always a bit gash.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:39, Reply)

Bad U2 Joke
Hey kids, if you go to Glastonbury Festival this year don't stand too close to The Edge!
( Peej, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:44, Reply)

get the fuck out of my thread.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:44, Reply)

Or what!
Come on Chompy, if you think your hard enough. I'll get my dad on you.
( Peej, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:51, Reply)

upon Reflection
The Bearded Theory Festival is a far better option.........
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:49, Reply)

Upon reflection
sitting in a puddle of piss in a rainswept bus shelter in Doncaster is a far better option.....
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:52, Reply)

Is it your life ambition to be a tramp?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:54, Reply)

It's to escape the cycle of trampdom

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:59, Reply)

ha ha
he has obviously achieved it.........
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:00, Reply)

sitting in a puddle
drunkenly ranting about how much he hates Bowie while people look on with a mixture of sympathy and fear
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:03, Reply)

sympathy and fear envy and wonderment.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:05, Reply)

mfrmfrdrubgBOWIE!mfwiforeio
mfoenueKILLEDMYDOGTHEBASTARDmjhdiuehRAAAH
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:10, Reply)

Are you covertly recording me?
That's uncanny.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:14, Reply)

see that pot plant behind you...?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:20, Reply)

Stevie Wonder will be ace
I don't need to say what I think of U2

Muse trouble me. for several reasons.
they are great live
they are tossers
all of their new songs sound exactly the same
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:49, Reply)

Muse are the only ones I'm not that bothered about seeing,
because they're one of those bands that I know I'll have a chance of seeing again (and I've seen them before).
(PsychoChomp, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:52, Reply)

I saw them at the Eden Project which was superb quite frankly
not sure I'd be fussed about seeing them again though, given the state of the last two albums
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:06, Reply)

I think the very same thing about Muse.
I wish I hated ALL of their songs.
And I'll never forgive them for whoring Jeff Buckley's name about when they started out.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:53, Reply)

They were probably at their best around the time they released Feeling Good
but their old stuff was much more original and better.

Today's stuff is too produced, too hand clappy and too effecty. and every song is the same
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:04, Reply)

Sorry?
Who are you?

Yeah, everything has sounded the same for quite some years now.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:06, Reply)

Bellamy's dad
played guitar on Telstar by the Tornados. Margaret Thatcher's favourite song.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:02, Reply)

I knew there were more reasons to hate them
also, everyone from Teignmouth is a dickhead.

Worse though, is that cunt Chris Martin is from Exeter, and that daft bint Joss Stone is from nearby too.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:05, Reply)

*points*
You're related to them.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:08, Reply)

you're related to those scouser from the fast show
and the ones in Lock, Stock
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:09, Reply)

And Margi Clarke
Yup.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:12, Reply)

Is your dad The Beatles?

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:13, Reply)

Yeah
And my mum is The La's.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:22, Reply)

Christ!
Robyn Hitchcock lives in Winchester - and the mighty TROGGS hail from nearby Andover. That's all I have to offer. Apart from this....

I heard, now don't take this as gospel, but I heard that legendary psychedelic funk act Electric Head Funk were also from around those parts...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:09, Reply)

no. way.
*whispers* I hear that post-prog duo The Red Squirrel / Grey Squirrel Scenario live and work around here...
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:12, Reply)

no fucking WAY, duuuuude!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:14, Reply)

I camped on their lawn and their mum made me a cuppa

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:23, Reply)

I camped on their lawn and made their mum a cuppa

( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:26, Reply)

Really?
You learn something new everyday, Thatch, a Joe Meek fan, by proxy.



*Hums 'I Hear a New World'*
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:10, Reply)

Not sure if she was aware of his *cough* lifestyle choices....

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:15, Reply)

The guy is a legend
His, 'I Hear a New World' album was grounbreaking stuff, it still sounds crisp as fuck. The sleeve notes for the tracks are a great insight into the mind of a crazed genius.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:19, Reply)

Psychedelic pioneer for sure

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 17:39, Reply)

Blind, Deaf and Dumb?
Actually, I have nothing against Muse, but it would have been shit if I'd written "Blind, pretty good and dumb".
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 3 Feb 2010, 16:57, Reply)