Short personal honest.
Thank all the people you have to,
don't try to be funny if you're not.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:13, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

good advice
I'm banking on being enough of a bastard to everyone I know that no one will ask me to be their best man.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:15, Reply)

I like this,
he is ginger though. Problem is, so is half of his family.
( @RBFesquire Good luck b3ta, was nice knowing you. So long., Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:16, Reply)

serves them right
you need to start off with some kind of joke about being surprised he has any friends because he is ginger
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:17, Reply)

I know,
there are loads I can do. Any put down. And when I first knew him, he had LONG ginger hair. A must I feel...
( @RBFesquire Good luck b3ta, was nice knowing you. So long., Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Well if you're not sure..
Find a bunch of old pictures of him and tape them under peoples chairs. Then when everyone thinks you've given a really nice, honest speech, you can invite them to reach underneath... I'm sure the jokes will write themselves.
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:27, Reply)

Well say something like,
"oh I didn't realise there'd be so many red heads here, I'll have to cut my speach short"
Then tear off 10 pages from your speach.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:17, Reply)

I like this idea

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Hey,
great minds think alike :-)
( @RBFesquire Good luck b3ta, was nice knowing you. So long., Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:18, Reply)

This amuses me greatly

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:42, Reply)

I should be your best man.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:52, Reply)

well you've pretty much already started preparing
so I wouldn't want to disappoint you.

The guy who thinks he's going to be my boyfriend's best man will be lucky if he gets anywhere near my wedding anyway. He introduced the two of us, but when my bloke later said that he fancied me, the guy said "dude, everyone's been there".
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 15:17, Reply)

ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
hahahahaha
I like him already, he should be your best man.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 15:18, Reply)

He was the photographer for his girlfriend's sister's wedding
and turned up late.

He wasn't asked to do the photography at his next friend's wedding and he spent the whole party slagging off the real photographers.

Funnily enough he's the guy I was slating the other day for always letting people down.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 15:33, Reply)

In that case
Try and avoid anything along the lines of the last wedding I went to, where the best man had already had a few, and included as one of the jokes, forgetting that the priest was at the reception, as well as all of their parents,
"I can assure you one thing about this man: the carpet matches the drapes."
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:24, Reply)

This is further proof,
that I shouldnt drink before the speech. I need some pain killers though for my emerging wisdom tooth.
( @RBFesquire Good luck b3ta, was nice knowing you. So long., Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:29, Reply)

drapes what a numpty

curtains is what he meant, lolz
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:34, Reply)

I know! I bet he felt a right prawn when he realised...

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 7 Apr 2010, 14:40, Reply)