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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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chicken and choritzo sandwich today
I've lost half a stone in three weeks. Yay. Downgraded myself from super fat to fattyfatfat.

Still not as fat as Al though...
Do you really want a question?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:13, 117 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
Yes, please.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:17, Reply)
How was your holiday?

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:17, Reply)
Excellent thank you, old chum.
Testing at times, but being woken each morning by my beautiful child was beyond compare. I really, really miss her every morning.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)
GAAAAAAAAAAY

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)
Fuck off, fatso.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:03, Reply)
touche

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:19, Reply)
Hello!

(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:22, Reply)
Hello old bean
How's tricks?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)
good effort on the weight loss
and on the sandwich.

chorizo is the fucking business
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:26, Reply)
I quite like to crisp up chorizo by shallow frying it, with some garlic and sun dried tomatoes, and then toss some pasta through it.
That's my recopy for the day
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)
Try the same
But then, instead of putting it on pasta, use the oil to fry an egg or two. Eat with some toasts with tomatoe and olive oil.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)
I also like that sort of thing
I've recently discovered that if you fry up a bit of chorizo and then stir it into beans it is really nice
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)
Fry chorizo in Coca-cola
This sounds

a) weird and
b) disgusting

...but is actually great. Chappie at my farmer's market tipped me for this.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:39, Reply)
My mum sometimes does chicken fillets in Coca Cola

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)
I bet it's actually Rola Cola

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)
You cheeky get
My mother would never do that.
Proper brands or nowt for her.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)
Good to hear it too
If it's not Coca Cola, it's vastly inferior.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)
it's not even cola

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:06, Reply)
I will try this
it sounds great
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:52, Reply)
Sounds similar to the Nigella Lawson recipe for ham cooked in cola
It's lovely.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)
I've heard that is good
been meaning to try it
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:26, Reply)
We do it each year at Christmas
Always used to do a ham soaked in cider and then honey roasted but the cola is easier and far, far tastier - it does make you feel like US trailer trash though.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:38, Reply)
I would quite like a question, if you don't mind.
But don't give me a hard one, I already had a hard one today and I don't think my head could take another hard one.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:26, Reply)
You said HARD ONE
Three times. Are you trying to turn me on?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)
I'll be honest with you, a cold shower on a warm day like today would be more benificial.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Ok : (

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Its to hot for any rumpy pumpy, even it's just literature.
It's the kind ofbday where a nice pint glass filled with a can of red bull, the 50/50 orange juice and cranberry juice, and a splash of Campari and a few ice cubes... Would be much nicer.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)
That sounds yummy but I'm off the booze till Friday.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
And then we're all overdosing
Well, all you lot are - I'll stick to 3 glasses of wine max otherwise I'll be sick.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:08, Reply)
You haven't seen the size of my wine glasses.
Bwhahahaha!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)
I'll make sure I eat lots then

Oh fuck it. I'll get pissed.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:39, Reply)
mm chicken and chorizo
sounds good. And congratulations on the weight loss
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:30, Reply)
I'm well pissed off
people keep hanging up on me without saying thanks or bye, it's really pissing me off. I feel like ringing them back and asking why they don't feel the need to use good manners.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:33, Reply)
Will it improve your day if I say thank you?
I'm sure there is something I should be grateful for, and I've missed the person and the oportunity, so for you, who seems to be in need.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:35, Reply)
Aww, Aberracion's lovely!
Kitty? *hangs up*
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)
douchehole.
You're undoing Aberracion's good work!
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)
he's crap like that

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)
YOUR FACE IS CRAP LIKE THAT!
And I was nice to you down there at the bottom, but you're always so mean to me!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
So you were
I'm sorry. I'll buy you a KFC
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)
WOOOOOO!!!!
You're ace you are!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)
ha
so easily you are bought
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:48, Reply)
For KFC I will do most things

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)
*takes note*
*remembers family ties*

*bokes*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:52, Reply)
Hehehe :p

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)
O rly?
*evil laugh*
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)
Emphasis on the 'most'
Meaning it's entirely at my discretion, and I may just steal your KFC anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)
*sadface*
why would you do that
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:58, Reply)
Dammit
You're too good at that! I won't steal your KFC.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:59, Reply)
I guess my username means douchehole
Thank you
happy now?
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)
you are a major douchehole
so yes I'm slightly happier.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)
I'm actually wounded by that
I'm sorry for everything evil I've done, especially that Karma Cat...
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)
sorry I didn't mean it.
don't hurt the kitty
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)
I would never hurt the kitty
Never.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:25, Reply)
aww thanks
I feel better now.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:42, Reply)
You're welcome
I was having a crappy day today, but my mother has managed to get me involved again into this mess that is tying the knot. I should say thanks to her, but there is too much dry resentment for that.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
Tying the knot you say?

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)
Nice work, sis
Nice work!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:55, Reply)
Hahaha!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)
Aw man I hate it when that hap *Ka Chick! oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo*

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)
Congratulations!
I ate all the chorizo my mother brought last time. I still have salchichón and jamón, but I miss the chorizo.

Ah, yes, thanks for asking, Mark got the job in Worthing! Woho! He hasn't said yes just now because he needs to study the conditions and because he has another 2 interviews this week, but I want Worthing, I've decided.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:34, Reply)
Hooray!
And boooo! you'll be miles away.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)
I'll go and visit
And you can come and visit us as well, and we'll go to France for the weekend. We can even meet boat guy and do big parties and everything.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)
Wooooo!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:48, Reply)
As long as the weight hasn't gone from your boobs, then congratulations.

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:35, Reply)
^This
Mine shrank to hollow sacks when i lost loads of weight years ago.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)
I wouldn't put this on your match.com profile if I were you.

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:40, Reply)
It can't make it any worse. *laughs*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)
I'm sure we can make it worse
Maybe you should let us all play with it on Sat and "improve" it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:48, Reply)
Truthfully I'm not on it anymore.
I deleted my accounts. I'm just on Eharmony and that will run out soon. It's all been a waste of time and money.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:50, Reply)

EHarmony Adult Friend Finder, Fetlife, Bound, RubberLovers and Shibari Lovers United
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)
Now they wouldn't be a waste of money.
Even I could cop off on one of those sites.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)
Note, some I made up
and 'Shibari Lovers United' is my little pun on that particular fetish.
Japanese rope bondage
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:58, Reply)
My best friend found her lover on Friends Reunited
apparently they have a dating site attached - she didn't already know him. Mind you she did have to go out with a 'business man' first - he bragged about how he was a veritable captain of industry...turned out he was a taxi driver.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:18, Reply)
^ This
I've lost 3.5 stone in the last year, and my formerly awesome D cups have now been reduced to a ping pong ball in a sock-like B. Extreme sadtimes :(

Well done on the weight loss though TGB, I know how much hard work it is.
(berk, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:50, Reply)
*stabs at your chest with a table tennis paddle*
why...isn't this.....WORKING!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)
I think it might be the 'stabbing' bit
you murderous bastard.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:58, Reply)
pit pat pit pat pit pat pit pat it's working now, clendrix, no need to worry pit pat pit pat pit pat pit pat

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:04, Reply)
Life is better with a steady rhythm, Gumsy

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)
that sounds naughty

(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:20, Reply)
good work Berk
Although for a very long time I did think you were a guy so now I have an image of a thin man mouring the loss of his moobs.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)
Haha, fortunately not
although there is a guy at work who has bigger moobs than my genuine lady chesticles. *shudders*
(berk, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)
You work with Al?

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:12, Reply)
Is Al
particularly well boobaged for a man? No, this dude is called Graham, and he looks like Peter Griffin.
(berk, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:13, Reply)
Al's moobs are the size of grapefruit.
Giganto grapefruit.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:15, Reply)
No it's going from my waist at the moment
hurrah. I'm looking forward to seeing everyones boobs at the weekend
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)
Not mine, I'm sorry
They're not worth it :(
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)
We'll be the judge of that.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:50, Reply)
...with violence, if necessary.

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:01, Reply)
Or even if not necessary.

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:02, Reply)
: p

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:02, Reply)
At what time is the competition?
I might have an appointment just then.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)
Why do boobs do that?
Mine are half the size they used to be. I've never been Zeppelin like, but I now have barely a handful.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:12, Reply)
they're just contrary
though I would swap mine for Applebite's legs :(
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:13, Reply)
BWOOBEES!
My breasts look like to two snooker cues.

You may now all mander me.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:52, Reply)
Congratulations on the weight loss!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:35, Reply)
if I ever lose weight my dad says "Turn around. Ah, I've found it, it's in your ass"
I won't say this to you.
Congrats!
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)
I love it when people see losing half a stone as a big achievement
but the fact is, body weight can fluctuate by half a stone on an given day, depending on how much you eat, the amount of exercise you do and whether or not you've had a really big poo.

Try harder, TGB
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:11, Reply)
but if you are consistently
half a stone lighter than you were at the beginning, that is an achievement.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:12, Reply)
True, but it's not much of one
and it certainly isn't worth bragging about.

These lunch threads don't even have a 'Dave the Facts' ffs
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:16, Reply)
Stop pining for the past and look to the future.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:18, Reply)
I'm looking to the future
I'm excited about the weekend.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:19, Reply)
I'm OK apart from worrying what to feed people.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:20, Reply)
we're not fussy
If cheese is available that would be awesome
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:21, Reply)
Cheese aplenty.
I might even get some posh crisps.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:23, Reply)
Get some Philidelphia
and pour sweet chilli sauce on it. Best dip EVAH! Apart from the crazy chicken and cheese dip some american people brought to a party once. That was incredible.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:24, Reply)
How close are you to shops/take-outs/pubs?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:24, Reply)
Everything in Todmorden is nearby.
It's only a little place but the pubs are boring. They're either full of kids or old fogeys.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:28, Reply)
Do any of them sell 'scrumpy' with a 2 pint limit?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:29, Reply)
Haha!
I can find out.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:31, Reply)
That stuff was bloody gorgeous
And more than a little lethal.

Man, I'm going to get drunk this weekend.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:32, Reply)
You didn't look drunk at all when you had that cider.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)
I really felt it...

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:36, Reply)
BTW
The weekend after next is the Todmorden cider festival : /
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:37, Reply)
BAH!
Ah well, I'd rather have awesome company than good booze :)
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Tell us what food to bring
If you tell us it will come

/channels Kevin Costner
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:31, Reply)
You don't need to bring anything.
My nephew is making cup cakes for us. *grins*
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:33, Reply)
COR!
I *love* cup cakes!
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 22 Jun 2010, 14:41, Reply)

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