I've just discovered that there are two or more other b3tans living in Exeter
and one of them is a DJ on a local radio station. Fancy that!

Anything surprising happened since someone last asked?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:17, 123 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

You should call them up and be all like "lol i know you online lol" and then have an asthma attack down the phone.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:21, Reply)

I think personally think too many b3tans live in London, the greedy shits.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:22, Reply)

they're on /links
they probably haven't posted anything incriminating
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

mother fruiting brotherflippers.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

When did someone last ask?

(PsychoChomp, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:22, Reply)

well, did they?

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

Any in Bristol?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

you still haven't quite got the hang of replies have you?
in answer, yes there are at least 3 that I know of in Bristol.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:24, Reply)

does Rosie count?
cos if so, I'm going to pull her at the next bash
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:25, Reply)

She fucking loves bashes

(PsychoChomp, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:26, Reply)

I'll bash her skull in with my cock
while it's still soft
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:27, Reply)

I know she is young
but I think her skull has hardened by now
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:28, Reply)

She's not young at all,
that's just some of her online lies.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

I give up!
it's so hard to see through this twisted web of lies.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

You're probably wrong there, V
babies are born with soft skulls, I think it takes a few weeks for them to harden
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

so you are saying she is a baby
less than a few weeks old?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:31, Reply)

I mean baby Rosie Catface
if you're referring to that other Rosie, I have no idea
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:32, Reply)

I thought you were talking about rosalicous.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:33, Reply)

Naaaaaaw
NO FAT CHIX
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:33, Reply)

I can almost hear her disapointment from here, she'll be GUTTED.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:37, Reply)

I'm kidding Gonz, chillax
she looks like she'd be a right go-er
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:39, Reply)

me too
but only after you posted. so I'm blaming you entirely. you bastard.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:34, Reply)

that would explain the confusion
I blame Chompy for misdirecting me.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:33, Reply)

*belms*

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:34, Reply)

Rosalicous ?
She doesn't live in Bristol.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:32, Reply)

it's become too confusing Gonz
don't get involved.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:34, Reply)

i havent got the hang of very much at all, what am I doing wrong? (shut the fuck up bert monkey sex)

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:26, Reply)

if you want to reply to a particular post
then click on the reply link directly after that post.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:27, Reply)

Stop it, Vipros
this guy's doing it deliberately, he's Psychochomp's comedy account and he's acting like a dick on purpose to wind me up.

It's not working, YOU CUNT
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Thanks Vipros, and I'm not Chompy but if its annoying the cunt hair that is Berts fuck it I'll enjoy it.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:33, Reply)

I think I love you
so, you'd better be female, or at least have a smaller cock than me
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:34, Reply)

do one Bumder.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:38, Reply)

I don't do requests

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:40, Reply)

ha!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

You are the worst, worst troll/comedy account, ever
even Mos from the IT Crowd is more likeable than you
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:28, Reply)

My crusty ass hole is more likeable than you. And I for one like Moss.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Of course you do
anybody who is genetically defective would
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:30, Reply)

chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp
chompy chompy moss moss, chompy chompy moss moss!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:34, Reply)

You have a crusty bumhole?
I love it when I don't whipe my bum properly and poo gets on my bumhair and goes all crusty and you get to pick i...... I, I just don't know why I do these type of posts any more, my heart just isn't in it.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:59, Reply)

I thought they might have done earlier
but I may be mistaken
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

somebody posted a new thread
I think it might have been you. Today's been awfully exciting
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:23, Reply)

I got got in to work to find the top car park has stopped charging for parking during the summer holidays
Coincidentally the day they stop charging a travellers caravan park has appeared. What's odd is half appear to have shitty old caravans towed by shitty old transits, but the other half either have flash motor homes or flash caravans pulled by expensive looking 4x4's. One of them has set up a wendy house for their kids and anyone who has a wendy house for their kids can't be bad can they?
( Peej, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:30, Reply)

It's a wendy house bought with dirty money!!
that's no lesson to teach the kids.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:18, Reply)

Security have gone round locking doors everywhere
They see them and instantly think everything is going to get nicked. That said, I'm not leaving my laptop here tonight.
( Peej, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:33, Reply)

Amazon has just delivered the new Stephen King book
I was surprised that it's as thick as a phone book (Probably as interesting to read as well).
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:32, Reply)

what's it called/about?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:36, Reply)

"Under the dome"
I'm assuming it's the same premise as The Simpsons movie

Edit - Just read the blurb...small town gets cut off by invisible force field. Sounds like a rip-off of "The Midwich Cuckoos"
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Milking a practically dry cash cow for all it's worth
And generally being pretty shit?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:40, Reply)

Sounds about right.
I finished his exellent book "On Writing" the other day and then got carried away on Amazon. Hence I have his new book.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:45, Reply)

Don't get me wrong,
I do love Stephen King. But his recent books are beginning to make me think he's peaked.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:47, Reply)

I liked Lisey's story

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:48, Reply)

I liked "Cell", which gets pretty mixed reviews.
I loved the idea of a pulse going out that sent anyone on a mobile mad
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:50, Reply)

does sound good
I've not read anything of his since his last book of short stories gave me really weird dreams.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:52, Reply)

I envy your ability to read books and then get weird dreams.
Didn't "Gateway" give you weird dreams? I read the book because of that and what happened to my dreams?...Nothing.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:54, Reply)

yeah, gateway gave me particularly weird ones
my dreams tend towards the odd anyway, and just occasionally something I've read will spark off some extra weird dreams. It's quite enjoyable. I don't tend to be scared by them, despite most of them having a scary premise, but often find that I'm left feeling thoughtful or some random emotion for most of the next day.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:58, Reply)

I only tend to remember dreams where i'm being chased by zombies
which seems to happen more times than is safe for ones mental health
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:06, Reply)

I get quite a lot of those too

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:11, Reply)

Cell was awesome
and typical King kind of creepy.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:19, Reply)

I agree
but if you look it up on Amazon, it's one of his least liked books.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:21, Reply)

I loved the Dark Tower series, the rest, meh.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:50, Reply)

I want to start Darktower
but the first 3 books get ace reviews, then the rest nosedive. I went through that with the "Dune" books, not sure I can go through that again.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:52, Reply)

Worth sticking with, the third and fourth are the weakest in my opinion, the last is soooo good. I don't know if you know of Jon Shannow in David Gemmell books, but Roland is reminiscent of him and a really good character.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:55, Reply)

i'll give them a go
it's got to be better than watching tv (or getting a life)
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:57, Reply)

Kaol sent me the first one
which was nice of him. thoroughly enjoyed it, but not got round to getting the others.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:59, Reply)

I can post you the others if you really want them apart from the last one as its a big huge hard back that would cost me a weeks wages to send!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:03, Reply)

tempting
but I fear I have nothing to offer in return. I have a terrible affliction that means once I have a book I can't let it go :-/
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:04, Reply)

if you change your mind the offers there,
I am not fussy about not getting books back as I do love buying a new book, if it was a dvd though I would hunt the fuckers sorry ass down! I hate it how DVD's migrate
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:08, Reply)

thanks
I appreciate that. I'll bear it in mind
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:13, Reply)

I'm going to keep checking back with you to make sure you're bearing it as promised

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Good old Kaol
Didn't he move to Wales to become a teacher? I hope he's enjoying it (or at least as much as one could enjoy being a teacher in Wales)
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:04, Reply)

not quite a teacher
he has a menagerie which he takes round to schools to terrify children with
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:06, Reply)

He never could let the zoology degree go

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:09, Reply)

What colour should I paint my nails?
That's the most exciting thing for me to decide today.
It's a toss up between "blueberry" dark purple, "Tantalise" dark red, "electric punk" blue or "hello sailor" Blue-green.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:39, Reply)

Electric Punk is a colour!?
Now that's a colour like the sound of!
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:41, Reply)

It's a dark metallic blue
It's very nice.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:44, Reply)

varicose vein blue

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:42, Reply)

I ran out of that one last week :(

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:45, Reply)

abortion yellow?

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:46, Reply)

Nope.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:47, Reply)

Period blood red

(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:54, Reply)

Now that one I think I might....
Yep, here it is.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:02, Reply)

electric punk blue

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:44, Reply)

Hello Sailor
mine need painting again, I've not done them since the bash.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:44, Reply)

Though Blueberry is an excellent song

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:45, Reply)

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:46, Reply)

What, why? Why have I disappointed you?!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:47, Reply)

You should only listen to Motley Crue.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:49, Reply)

Wait, have you heard of LOTP?

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:50, Reply)

who? I bet they don't wail and have rotating drum kits and sing about strippers and drugs.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:57, Reply)

They sing good songs.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:04, Reply)

I doubt this youngling.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:10, Reply)

"hello sailor" blue-green
definitely
( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:46, Reply)

That's two each for electric punk and hello sailor.
Come on guys, I need a decider. Electric punk is the one I painted Al's nails at the bash, BUT hello sailor looks different colours from different angles.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:50, Reply)

Red and black and sky blue.
you'll look well unique.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:01, Reply)

Don't be fucking daft.
Only emos have black nails.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:03, Reply)

And coal miners.
Not that there's many of those about these days.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:26, Reply)

Hello sailor!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:22, Reply)

that the south west has electricity!

( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:45, Reply)

You mean they've gotten it before us?
The bastards!
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:46, Reply)

Hahahaha
Beats me making jokes about northerners and their outdoor toilets I suppose. Didja see my thread earlier?
( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:47, Reply)

Don't take the piss, when my parents bought our house in 84, the only toilet was up the top of the garden.
And there were still gas lamps upstairs.

Nope. What was it about?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:48, Reply)

about me being a desparate, gay
wussy beta male apparently.
( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:52, Reply)

Beta males are the best

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:53, Reply)

I like it.
Can I have an honorary one in my profile since I inspired it?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:04, Reply)

Oh go on then
I approve ;)
( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:12, Reply)

Yes!

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:16, Reply)

what you wrote next to it made me lol

( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:37, Reply)

I was born in 84, it was the dark ages

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:23, Reply)

And regular power cuts
those annoying ones that only last for a minute or so, but might happen 3 times in a row. Re-setting digital clocks has never been so much fun.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:48, Reply)

we don't get those here

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:51, Reply)

well you see
some scientist found that by putting an electric current through quartz it was possible to make a time-piece without moving parts. They then put some computer circuits and light emitting diodes around it and... sorry, I've lost you haven't I?
( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:54, Reply)

very good indeed
you bastard
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:54, Reply)

You don't live in some piss-pot back-of-beyond village though
like wot I do (although I wouldn't want to live anywhere else).
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:15, Reply)

that is true
but I used to, and we didn't get them there either.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:28, Reply)

GREMLINS

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 15:52, Reply)

GREMLINS II
the new batch
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:23, Reply)

Hardly surprising
Shit all the same.
Has put my plans a bit squiff...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:03, Reply)

c'mere
let me de-squiff that for you
( djtrialprice, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:38, Reply)

You...
;)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:50, Reply)

Fuck yes.
Unless he's posting from beyond the grave, 'Wet Ham Man' appears not to have been murdered, after all. I cannot actually believe this.

Here he is, right as rain:

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 16:06, Reply)

I found out that my brother
once owned a monster truck. He bought it for £1000 on ebay, then sold it because of a lack of legroom
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 12 Jul 2010, 18:41, Reply)