"I love you so much, I can't shit"

(fibonacci_cunt cunt, cunt, cuntcunt, cuntcuntcunt,..., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:05, 72 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Wow, erm, gee.
Thanks for that.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:06, Reply)

Are you talking to Guiness?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:07, Reply)

So sweet
You should try that game someone posted before. It's fun and you always shit.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:12, Reply)

he posted it in the first place

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:15, Reply)

Ah, look at that
Maybe he loves that game so much he can't go to the toilet IRL.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:23, Reply)

Was this meant for Kristines thread?

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:12, Reply)

you didn't post a question
IT'S NOT STATEMENT OF THE WEEK!!!

you're upsetting me and when I'm upset I use loads of exclamation marks and that upsets the Chomp!!!!!!!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:26, Reply)

Breathe, breathe, there we are
Do you want a question? Which things stop you shitting?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:31, Reply)

Which hand do you use to wipe your arse?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:31, Reply)

Yours
Alright sexy?
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:32, Reply)

Who are you
and why are you calling me sexy?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:32, Reply)

Because you are

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:33, Reply)

*winks* *triggerfingers*
Back atcha!
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:34, Reply)

Bloody hell, I'm well in here

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:34, Reply)

Aw mate!
Have you forgotten so soon?
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:33, Reply)

No idea who you are
slightly worried now
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:34, Reply)

*sadface*
Okay, but we both know you're hot.
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:35, Reply)

I don't know who he's either
But he must be a teenager.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:36, Reply)

At heart, yes.

(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:37, Reply)

I don't know
You might not be a teenager, as you ninja edited your your for you're.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:40, Reply)

Ha!
Yeah, couldn't make up my mind, then I realised I was right after all.
Mustn't head to the pub at lunchtime!
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:42, Reply)

Haha
Yeah, blame it on the beer :)

I hope it was good beer too.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:43, Reply)

Yeah, good stuff
Real ale.
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:45, Reply)

Then I'll excuse you
I could do with a nice beer now. I have 2 bottles of chocolate old tom waiting for me at home. We're having toad on the hole and a version of it with mushrooms instead of sausage. The beer will go perfect with them.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:47, Reply)

I don't like this

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:38, Reply)

Sorry mate
Didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable, but we had a laugh ages ago and I've not been back around here for a long time - yours was the only name I recognised.

*shrugs*
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:40, Reply)

What did we talk about, Dick?
and why did it have such a profound effect on you? Was it before or after my breakdown?
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:41, Reply)

I'm guessing before
You had a profound effect because you made me laugh and you fucked goats - always good for a laugh, if you can catch the buggers.
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:43, Reply)

That was a long time ago, Dick
the goat-fucking trio have disbanded, Kaol's off somewhere in Wales, balls deep in a girl who's only vaguely preferable to a sheep, and Al's buggered off to marry some tart with a face like a downsy royal.

:(
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:52, Reply)

Ew, I use bogroll

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:32, Reply)

The whole of it?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:33, Reply)

Yup

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:35, Reply)

sideways?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:35, Reply)

I start on the edge

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:36, Reply)

And work your way to the other side
or change direction when you're around the middle?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:37, Reply)

change

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:38, Reply)

You must end up with sticky fingers, then.

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:39, Reply)

I know someone who'll buy that bog roll off you after you're finished using it, you can get a good rate these days, depending on your diet.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:37, Reply)

That's sick man
Sicker than a lot of things. Sicker even than a glass coffee table - ever had one?
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:44, Reply)

They look pretty at the shop
But I know that at my home they'll just look dusty and dirty.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:47, Reply)

I don't like questions about poop!
call yourself a BFF, psh.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:35, Reply)

Oh, but the whole thread is about poo
Right, I'll change the question just for you. What silly things have/haven't you done for love.

Better?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:38, Reply)

aww that's better, thanks :D
I let my ex live with me for a month because his parents threw him out. He used the time and freedom to bring other women back to my flat.

That was pretty silly.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:43, Reply)

FFS
Really? That's crap, sorry. At least you got rid of him now.

I let a stupid bastard to take advantage of me several times, make me cry, abuse me... at the begining for love, and then because I was scared.

They can be really bad and we can be pretty silly.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:45, Reply)

I'm really not bothered about it anymore
because Wiggy makes up for everything bad that ever happened and for this guy to be so shit just makes me realise how lucky I am.

Sorry, that was uncharacteristically soppy.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:59, Reply)

This isn't QOTW anyway
nobody here posts just one question a week, that'd be daft.

This is Off Topic, it's sub-QOTW.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:31, Reply)

I suppose so
but it's more tradition I suppose. If you don't ask a question you should at least try and engage fellow posters with a lively discussion.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:37, Reply)

Or jsut call them all a bunch of cunts

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:41, Reply)

She wouldn't do that
She's a nice girl.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:41, Reply)

You're such a liar
that Kitty's pure wrong, you should have seen the gazzes she used to send me... photos of her sister in next to nothing, they were
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:53, Reply)

Tsk, don't talk like that about my BFF
or I'll stop liking you.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:56, Reply)

yeah Bert.
so ner.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:03, Reply)

You like me?
I like you too, Abe. Now I'm having second thoughts about Becky from Fredley Park, maybe you and I are meant to be together now instead
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:03, Reply)

An ex of mine once drunkenly told me that me and my sister
looked the same naked.

He's a douche.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:00, Reply)

AWESOME
I like him alot
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:03, Reply)

thought you might
I was so upset I covered myself in tattoos so no one will make the same mistake again. That'll learn him.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:03, Reply)

YEAH
Tattoos are the business, I have a really cool angel that I designed on my arm, and military tattoos are pure shiz
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:05, Reply)

Oh fantastic, fibiosndfonasdofncco_cunt.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-u8ByQAY3Q&feature=related

That really cheered me up seeing that, Iwas feeling ever so down before.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:26, Reply)

I get off on being mean to people online
it makes me feel macho and sexy. Right now I could fuck a horse
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:28, Reply)

I think you're trying too hard.
There. I said it.
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:55, Reply)

Trying too hard for what?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:56, Reply)

trying too hard to make everyone like you
by gazzing them pictures of tapirs.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:00, Reply)

Are Tapirs like Capybaras?
I like them, my ex took me to the zoo once and I said they looked like a cross between a hairy pig and a cow
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:06, Reply)

to be mean

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:03, Reply)

It takes no effort at all
All the sweat on my palms and forehead are from looking at photos of Applebite on facebook
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:06, Reply)

what sort of club do have I got to join to see these photos?

( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:12, Reply)

Not really, I was lying on the internet
she's never come up as one of my friend recommendations, but Kitty O'Hara has repeatedly for some reason. Her photos and videos are nice
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:14, Reply)

lies on the internet?!
trouble is, I don't know what most of these people look like so when they do, I don't know who they are
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:17, Reply)

I'll gaz you a list of names if you like
you can get your stalk on
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:21, Reply)

ha
ha
nah
( Lisette von Falcon, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 18:23, Reply)

what the fuck?
I hate facebook.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Jul 2010, 7:53, Reply)

Easily sorted
Lube + anal
(Stiff Richard, Tue 13 Jul 2010, 17:32, Reply)